January. // z.m. au

Chapter 49

Love | Justin Nozuka

"He wants you to move in with him, dumb ass." Was the first thing Alexa had told me once I told her and Grace about my situation with Zayn. It wasn't that I hadn't expected Alexa to be so straightforward, but it did catch me by surprise at how blunt she was. And, of course she'd come at me with an insult, I'd been expecting that much.

"As much as I'd like to scold Alexa for her harsh words, I have to agree with her on that. You're a dumb ass." Grace chimed in. I guess I deserved that.

"Well, he could've just told me, you know. He was beating around the bush, how was I supposed to know?"

"You could've taken the hint at least." Alexa rolled her eyes.

"Oh shut up, he's so difficult sometimes. Plus, I didn't want to assume anything. How embarrassing would that have been?"

"I think it's safe to say that you've already embarrassed yourself enough." Grace shrugged. She hadn't even bothered to look up at me, just continued typing away at her phone like this situation wasn't a big deal.

Oh, it was a big deal alright. First of all, according to my two best friends, I was a complete dumb ass. Which, okay, I was totally fine with being called that since they did have a point. But then again, was I necessarily being that dumb? I mean, clueless was a better word I'd say, daft even, but I didn't think I was being dumb. I wasn't dumb, right?

"I can't believe you told him to keep his key." Alexa laughed like this was the funniest joke she'd been told in her life. Which was pretty funny seeing as this wasn't a laughing matter at all. "Like, he literally told you to keep it, but no, little Jan had other plans."

"Shut up," I groaned, roughly sliding my hands across my face. "He probably fucking hates me now."

"Hate is a strong word, you know." Grace added. I couldn't be bothered to respond to her seeing as I was sitting in my own pile of self pity right now. I felt so... dumb.

"He's probably plotting ways to break up with me as we speak." I pouted.

"Or maybe he's just, I don't know, feeling just as bad as you are." Alexa said. I highly doubted it, though. What did he need to feel bad about?

"Yeah," I scoffed. "Right."

"No, Alexa's probably right," Grace sat up, finally pocketing her phone. "I mean, like you said, he was beating around the bush, yeah? So if we're correct about him wanting to live with you, he's probably feeling bad that he didn't straight up ask you."

Now that I thought about it, what my friends were telling me did make sense. It put things into perspective as well. I mean, here the both of us were sulking (at least, I was going to assume that's what Zayn was doing) while we could be sorting this out. I supposed I should get to that pretty soon.

"You guys obviously have a ton to talk about."

Alexa was completely right. Zayn and I did have a lot to clear up and I couldn't deny the fact that I was somewhat dreading what was to come.

***

After hanging out with Grace and Alexa for a few more hours -- which I admit to stalling a bit so I wouldn't have to face my problems sooner -- I finally made mends to speak to Zayn. My heart was racing all the while.

This was a pretty big deal. If my friends' predictions happened to be true, of course, this would be a huge step Zayn and I would be taking. Because moving in together led to a lot more opportunities for our relationship to expand. Living together meant a lot more than just living together. I wasn't exactly sure if I was ready for that yet. But I did know I was willing to try.