Dissolving

Chapter 26 - Insomnia

I don't know how I managed without Jordan for six years.

Ever since he came back to live with us, he has been nothing short of amazing. Lately, I think he is the only person in my family who stands behind me no matter how badly I fail at being a good, reliable person and sibling. Thinking back to the past nine months since his return, I cannot remember even one occasion where he got really angry with me or questioned my decisions.

Sure, he freaked out like I have never seen before when he found out that I was approached by that strange guy at Noah's baseball game last week. But although his harsh reaction scared and confused me a bit, I know now that his rage wasn't aimed at me but at the situation.

Also, when I ran away with Will to Chicago, he was rather cool about the whole thing. He did have a few serious talks with me, of course, but so did everybody else. Jordan never made me feel like I was a huge disappointment to him though. Instead, he tried to show me the errors of my way and generally acted really understanding.

Not to mention how wonderful and supportive he has been throughout my recovery after the soccer accident. I genuinely don't know what I would have done if it hadn't been for him encouraging me to keep going whenever I was ready to surrender and just wither away in my bedroom for the rest of my sad existence, refusing to do my exercises or to simply face the world. He was always there to pick up the pieces and to motivate me to keep going. I don't know where he's got that determination from, but it might have something to do with what he went through as a teenager himself – a skill that I guess he later perfected in the military.

"Alright, bro, we'll see you tomorrow at 2pm," Jordan confirms, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Yep. – And you, young lady, make sure to take it easy until then," Sam replies, looking sternly at me via Jordan's phone screen.

"Ye-e-s," I drag out, annoyed to be reminded of the same thing for what feels like the tenth time in just as many minutes.

If it were for me, this phone call would only have lasted a couple of minutes, max. But, unfortunately, beggars can't be choosers, as they say.

"And please leave the attitude at home tomorrow, too," Sam adds, shaking his head.

"We'll show up right on time, don't you worry. And of course, we'll be the walking, talking, living and breathing sunshine happy people that you know we are," Jordan promises with a wide, cheesy smile while not so subtly nudging me with his shoulder.

"I'm looking forward to it," Sam retorts, a smile tugging at his lips at our brother's exaggeration. "Get some rest, squirt, and your knee should feel a lot better by tomorrow. Bye, guys."

Both Jordan and I say our goodnights to Sam and then the screen goes dark.

"That went okay, didn't it?" Jordan muses, pulling me against him.

I lean into his comforting embrace and enjoy our cuddle for a moment. He is right, it could have gone a lot worse. I initially didn't want to speak to Sam at all, fearing that he would chew me out for missing my appointment and worrying the family yet again. But Jordan insisted that we should talk to him together since he doubted that Sam would appreciate it if I hid behind my older brother and made him sort this out on my behalf. He felt that if I am old enough to disappear for a few hours, I should also be mature enough to face the consequences.

I obviously dreaded this phone call since my relationship with Sam is still fragile. Also, I figured that he would be none too pleased to hear that I potentially re-injured my knee when I ran and fell. As it turns out, Jordan is way more concerned about my painful knee than Sam is. Jordan examined it like he was an actual doctor who knew that he was doing, which I accepted wordlessly, since he certainly knows more about this than I do. He put ice on it and ordered me to stay in bed for the rest of the night. Sam, on the other hand, just cautioned me to take it a bit easy and to not consider running a marathon for the time being – his words, not mine.