→ ฬђєгє เร ๓ץ ๓เภ๔? → norman x reader

06. my guilt; is something wrong?

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ꜰᴏᴜʀᴛᴇᴇɴ ʏᴇᴀʀꜱ ᴍᴇᴀɴᴛ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴏɴᴇ ʏᴇᴀʀ ʟᴇꜰᴛ, and you hated thinking about it. You bonded and loved and cared and for what? Just to lose everything? Just to have them taken away? Just for him to be yanked from your hands?

You tried not to think about it, you just turned fourteen, Emma wasn't quite there yet, Ray was, and Norman was too.

That was the order: Ray, Norman, you, and Emma.

You felt so selfish for never telling them, him, about the real world, the cruel dark reality that they didn't even know existed. The reality that they would never know until it stood right in front of them. The reality they would only discover when they would be forced to part from it.

Well, that's what you thought anyway...

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"PSt! Y/N~ Y/N? Y/N!!", Emma says shaking your shoulder. She usually has to wake you up because you have your noise-canceling headphones on while you sleep. Not that Emma ever minds waking you up.

"Mhm...", you turn away and pull the blanket over your head.

Emma pokes your side repeatedly and you make a whining noise, sitting yourself up and glaring at Emma.

You pull down your headphones so that they hang around your neck, "What."

Emma giggles at your messy bed head and hops in your bed, "I woke you up last like always! All the others are ready."

You rub your eyes and yawn, "Oh. Sorry."

Emma smiles and gestures for you to sit in front of her. You sluggishly move and start to feel her hand hold your hair and a brush start to move through it.

"Thanks," you say mid-yawn.

Emma nods and hums, focused on putting your hair into two dutch braids. After a couple of minutes, she claps, "All done!"

You move off your bed and watch as Emma walks out of the room, leaving you being the only one in the girls' room. 

You peel off your nightshirt and swiftly put on your snow-white shirt. Even though you are alone in the room, you are scared the others will ask about or see the scars on your body. The ugliest one is around your neck, the biggest one is on the right side of your back, a large X shape. There are more scattered around your arms and legs and torso. Then there are your two tattoos. The one on the higher part of your neck: 11294, and the one just below your left collar bone. It was more intricate than the numbers, it hurt more too, it was formed with angled lines and something like a hexagon with more shapes inside. It resembles something like a cage.

Thanks to the scars on your legs Isabella gave you black tights to cover them up. You always wear them.

You are lucky that the collar of the white shirt covers the lower part of your neck, lucky that the shirt is long-sleeved, lucky for those black tights underneath your white skirt.

One time Norman asked you about why you always wear the tights even though the weather gets very hot, you just answered: "Becuase I like them." Norman also asked why you had black boots (something he has just recently seemed to notice) unlike everyone else, you answered: "I think it's because I wasn't brought here as a baby."