Janthony Oneshots

When the Bell Tolls

please listen to the song while you read.

*exhales*

here we go

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It had only been a year since his original diagnosis, but it felt much shorter than that. The two had only been married for a few months when they received the heart breaking news; Anthony had stage 2 lung cancer.

They started with treatments, but nothing seemed to be working. Chemo, radiation, everything. But nothing seemed to fight the sickness that took more and more away from him every day.

When flu season hit, Jasmine tried to be super careful, going out only when absolutely necessary, as to not bring anything home that could hurt him. Still, something managed to get in, and naturally, Ant caught it.

His cancer jumped to stage 4.

It was all the doctors could do to make him comfortable, having to tell the couple that he was simply living on borrowed time. Every day he stuggled more and more, until he eventually had to move into the hosptial, so that he had the resources he needed.

She stayed with him everyday, most times sleeping with him in his hospital bed, afraid that if she left him, he'd let go without her by his side.

It was September when they knew he was on his way out, but neither of them were ready for him to go.

His family had already been by, his brother and sister bidding him tearful goodbyes. It was especially hard for Steph. After losing her mother, and now being close to losing one of her older brothers, she felt like her world was crumbling around her.

Mario was affected too, but he wouldn't let it show. Usually Ant was the one who could get him to let down his walls, but now Mario stood firm. He would wait until he was behind a closed door before breaking down, cursing the world for taking out his brother and best friend.

He had to practically carry Steph out of the room when it was time to leave, sobs racking her thin frame at the raw pain she was feeling. They both felt hopeless. Mom - gone, Father - gone, and their only other brother couldn't even breathe on his own. The amount of loss and sorrow they felt couldn't possibly be put into words.

It was late afternoon when Anthony started to struggle more and more to breathe, dispite the steady drip of oxygen provided by his cannula. Jasmine was sat on the edge of his bed, stroking the pale skin on his face as she fought back tears, broken after seeing her soulmate in such a state of pain for so long.

"...Jas?"

His sentence was barely a whisper, just talking taking all the energy he had, but she heard it all the same.

"Yes baby?"

There was a pause before he could continue.

"Jas... I don't want to leave you."

She shook her head as a tear escaped, sliding down her cheek.

"Oh bubba, I'll see you again, don't worry."

"But what if I don't... what if I wasn't good enough? I swear... I swear I been trying to live for God. I tried... I swear I did. B-but I messed up. Wh-what if I don't get to see you again be-because I messed... messed up?"

His sentence was choppy, words interrupted by gasps for breath. Everything was getting harder. Even keeping his head propped up was a struggle.

Jasmine wasn't sure how she was to answer, but she decided to take a route of honesty and comfort.

"Well... then you pray. You pray to God and you ask for forgiveness."

He gave a weak nod before closing his eyes. He lifted his head, the room going silent aside from the beep of the heart moniter and the sound of Anthony's labored breathing.

It was a while before either of them spoke again, Anthony feeling a burning in his chest as tears dripped from his closed eyes.

"Jazzy..." He hissed in pain. "I'm not... I'm not ready to go yet Jas."

His sentence was filled with pain, and she knew he didn't have much time left. She kissed his temple before picking up his hand and kissing the back of it, finally letting her tears fall at the feeling of his cold, cold hand gripping hers.

"Shh, it's okay, you're... you're gonna be okay."

Tears were now streaming down her face, thousands of unsaid curses being sent up to the heavens. "Why?" they said. "Why are you taking my love from me? Why are you making him hurt like this?

She looked over at her husband, her rock. His eyes were shut, and his chest rose and fell in a ragged pattern. She could practically see the pain that came with every breath he took. She deperatley wished that he could be released from the hurt, but she wasn't ready for him to let go, to let go of him. She couldn't imagine a reality where he wasn't there to hold her. Where she wasn't tucked into his embrace, safe from the rest of the world.

"Jasmine... Jas-Jasmine."

She quickly snapped back into reality. Even in good times, he only ever used her full name when it was something important.

"Yes baby?"

Dispite his painful state, he managed a slight smile, the edges of his lips curling up.

"I love... I love you. My ba-baby."

What felt like millions more tears found their way onto her cheeks, but she couldn't be bothered to wipe them away. Her only focus was him.

"I love you too Anthony. Gosh, I love you so much. More than you'll ever know."

It was a couple seconds before she noticed the odd silence in the room.

His grip on her hand grew weaker and weaker, until she crumbled, the beep of the heart moniter turning into a shattering, steady droning.

Darkness surrounded her as she heard what sounded like bells, signaling that her love had gone home.

996 words

a/n - *hands over tissues*
A few tears may have been shed in the making of this

(Okay, more than a few.  Who am I kidding?)

Anyways, the next one will be lighter, I promise

Have a great day!
- Sarah :)