Chapter 49 - Curiosity

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CONTENT WARNING: suggestive themes, MAJOR secondhand embarassment lol

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Bakugou was embarassed at how much he was thinking about Y/N after she left.

Training in the mornings felt boring without her. She would usually piss him off, but the emptiness where she used to be was worse. It had only been two days but her absence already left a mark. It was only five more days. Five more days and then she would be back and everything would go back to normal.

After his shower he made his way to the 3-A classroom feeling much grumpier than usual. His peers seemed to pick up on it and left him be, though were very curious what was bothering him so much.

Kirishima, on the other hand, had no fear.

He approached Bakugou and slapped him on the back. "How you doin, my man? You feelin okay?"

"I'm fine."

Kirishima sighed. "Look, if that photo is bothering you, I totally get it. I'd be upset too--"

"What fucking photo?"

Bakugou's question didn't get an answer. Aizawa strolled into the room and Kirishima was ordered to his seat, leaving Katsuki completely in the dark-- but the fucks he gave were limited that day so it didn't bother him much. He was too cranky for that.

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When Bakugou arrived back at the dorms, he was in too crummy of a mood to make dinner. He stole one of Kirishima's protein drinks from the fridge and sulked to his room. He wasn't even sure why he was sulking-- it wasn't like he spent a lot of his time with Y/N anyways; so why did her absence feel so frustratingly heavy?

Once in his room he changed into his black tank top and sweats, collapsing on his bed and pulling out his phone.

Should he text her?

No. He didn't want to look like an idiot. He wasn't desperate. It's only five more days, Katsuki. Fucking get it together.

As he browsed through the news headlines, his mind started to wander back to her. What was she doing? Did she miss them? Was she going to go back to America after the next semester was over? Was she thinking about him too?

He set his phone down on his chest and squeezed his eyes shut in frustration. Stop. Thinking. About. Her. But she was just so... so funny, so weird, so exciting and so unreasonably beautiful. Those damn butterflies started to move around inside him again and he clenched his fists to try and diminish the feeling. It didn't work.

Though he tried not to, he wound up remembering the night she was in his bed. Just the thought of it made his heart start pounding and his breath catch in his throat. Part of him had hoped that after sleeping with her those confusing feelings would go away-- it only increased them tenfold. It was like he had taken a hit of a drug, not scratched an itch. The need to feel her again, kiss her again, touch her again was growing like an addiction. Goddammit.

"He'll have to wait in line."

Why the hell was that still in his head? It was just a joke. She was only trying to make him squirm the way she always did... right?

"Hmm... well it might be, because I like being in control too."

Maybe it wasn't a joke. And neither was the boner growing in his pants right now.

In a moment of weakness, Bakugou pulled his phone out again and went to... a certain website. Katsuki had never been the type of person to watch porn. He thought it was gross and overexaggerated-- and he was right, of course, but that didn't usually seem to stop other people. He just assumed it wasn't his thing... and it usually wasn't.

He was inwardly cringing at himself when he typed blowjob into the search bar. What am I doing? he thought.

No backing out now.

The titles of the videos were ridiculous, but the thumbnails were even worse. The men getting head in the photos looked so... vulnerable. Desperate. Is that what he would look like if he got a blowjob? The thought made him grimace. So far he was definitely not a fan.

He tapped on a video. Instant regret.

His phone was at full fucking volume. He almost dropped his phone as he scrambled to turn it down, the sound of a woman's erotic moans reverberating through his room. He frantically turned down the volume. Every fiber of his being hoped that Kirishima hadn't heard through the walls.

Once the panic of the porn noises subsided, he let himself eye his phone cautiously. He peeked out of one eye; why was he so uncomfortable? He blinked, trying to process what he was seeing.

The man was sitting on the edge of a bed, a woman between his legs bobbing her head up and down. The man looked so defenseless, so weak, so exposed. It was like his worst nightmare. Even the noises he was making felt... too vulnerable.

During sex, Bakugou was able to avoid that by taking the reigns. He was in charge of what happened. He touched her, and that way she never saw him looking like that. He maintained control, and he liked it that way. He felt protected. Guarded.

He exited out of the site and turned off his phone, slumping down in his bed. Okay, so he didn't like blowjobs. It wasn't his thing. His eyes closed and sighed, slightly relieved.

And yet...

Unable to stop himself, he imagined himself and Y/N in the position from the video; Her between his legs, her lips wrapped deliciously around his dick as she moved up and down, giving him so much pleasure that he couldn't even handle it.

And now he was hard again. What about her made it different?

It was irrefutable at this point. The idea of Y/N going down on him sounded... really nice. Too nice. He knew what her lips were like-- soft, warm, gentle as ever. The sensation it must create with her mouth on his cock-- well, that sounded embarrassingly good.

He was scared of being reduced to a moaning mess like the man in the video. The last thing Bakugou wanted was to let his guard down, but...

For something like that, it might be worth it.

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