𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐖𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐁𝐞 | 𝐉𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐞 𝐅𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫 ✅

7 - France

One Week Later

For a week, Eira and I went on in that way - she would leave her bedroom door open after 7PM, when she knew that Jenny's shift had finished, and by the time that the entire household had gone to sleep, I would have slipped into her bedroom and would be sitting by her bed, holding her hand tightly as she drifted off. Sometimes, when she cried, I would hold her head to my chest and soothe her, but I always made sure that the door was left open so that what I was doing was proper and Eira's reputation would not be ruined should anybody catch us together.

I was exhausted, and on my way to take up my shift for the night when my father asked me to step into his study for a private conversation.

"But Jenny -"

"Can wait a few more minutes, James." My father bowed his head, speaking lowly, "this is important."

When he had that tone of voice, I knew that he was serious. I nodded in understanding and let him take the lead as we walked to his study.

He sat down in his chair behind his desk, a fire blazing in the large fireplace behind him. He gestured to a chair in front of his desk for me to take, and I did, not seeing fit to argue with him.

"Ye'll no doubt ken that I have been exchanging letters with a family member of ours in Paris these past few months?"

I hadn't known that, but I nodded anyway. "Aye." I paused, "cousin Jared, is it?" He was the only family of ours that I knew of whom lived in Paris.

Father nodded, "aye. He has a townhouse close to the university -"

Ah. I knew where this was going.

"I canna leave Lallybroch."

"It's only for a year -"

"I can't leave Scotland." I paused, "ye need me in the fields, and Eira needs me here -"

"Eira will be fine without ye, she was before." My father frowned, "James, ye canna turn opportunities down because of Miss MacCraig -"

"Eira." I corrected him because to me she would never be anything else. "And I can. I left her once before, and it hurt us both. I willna put her - or myself - through that again -"

My father sighed, "James, I didna want it to happen like this... but ye dinna have a choice." He paused, "and Jenny and I will be here for Eira whilst ye are gone."

That wasn't good enough for me. I had to be the one here for Eira, but I knew that I had no choice in the matter. Whilst I was a man myself, my father was laird and I had to do whatever he willed of me until a time came when he was laird no longer.

So that meant that I had to go to university in Paris and that I had to be separated from Eira once more... and that also meant that I had to tell her that she was to lose one more person. I hated my father for making me go, and I hated myself because there was nothing that I could do to prevent my leaving.

I sighed and hung my head, looking at my tartan.

"When do I leave?"

"Saturday next." That was only six days away. My heart sank.

I had thought that I would have a little more time to say goodbye to my home, to Jenny and to Eira. I thought that I would have some time to prepare the speech that I would give to Eira; about how when I came back and she had recovered a little from the shocking death of her father, we would truly spend some time together, and hopefully, things would go the right way for us. But instead, I had a matter of days until I left, and that meant that I had to break the news to her as soon as possible.

"Ye're excused."

I stood up and left the study without another word to my father. I had to take over from Jenny, and then I had to think of how to tell the only girl that I had ever loved that I had to leave her once more.