He's Quiet Until You Listen

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This one is about my Grandpa who passed away a few years ago.

Dado, how could you be so quiet and loud at the same time?

How could you be quiet when you were here, and leave heavy silence behind?

Your quiet laughter,              faint like a soft wind in my ear.

The scraping of your callused hands as you would rub them together.

The soft taps of your shoes on the floor, and the shuffling of your feet on the carpet.

The way the coins would jingle in the front right pocket of your pants.

The way you could snore so softly, but fill the room with the sound of your breathing.

You were quiet until I really started listening.                      Then you were loud.

Your heartbeat slow and steady when I could listen,          only growing fast at the mention of surgery

How it stuttered like a broken-down car when hearing about cancer as well.

How did you remain so quiet?              Why could I never hear you cry?

No, there was only one sound that made my stomach knot up in anxiousness.

The soft, sharp gasps for air as you would cry               but you never let me hear more.

You made me stop.                 Listen to you, again, but more carefully.

Then I could hear you,     the Abuelo I knew. The one that helped raise me.

Your Spanish slowed and your accent thick like champurrado.

Your broken English as it would be filled with "uh's" and "um's," and the nickname "_____" (Sorry, that's personal)

The worried tone in your voice as you would fret over my wet hair at night.

The soft groans and grunts as you worked in the yard or of you burning your tongue on coffee.

The dismay in your tone as you explained why you ate three red chili peppers.

How could your tone be so kind and patient to anyone and everyone you'd met?

I never heard you raise your voice louder than the T.V. at the setting 24.

You never liked bothering people by making too much noise, did you?

I guess I have that in common with you.

I was really the only one who listened to you, hear the small sad tone ever-present in your speech.

I only have one question, Dado.

How come you chose to be so quiet?

Maybe it was because of where you came from.               Your past.

Maybe it was because you wanted to focus on family...            you always were a family man.

Maybe,                          it was something else...

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