When Lightning Strikes Sixx: A Tommy Thayer & Nikki Sixx Story)

Chapter 3- Awkward to say the Least (Tommy Thayer POV)

I take my shower & while I'm in there.... thoughts are as ever on Nikki. He makes me SO nervous, why does he have to be so intimidating? And why the hell is it always the beautiful ones? Or the sexy as hell, bad-boy types like one Nikki Sixx. I don't get it.... I don't get him. What is his deal? I'm trying to engage him in conversation but he's snappy & really kind of rude or very rude.... maybe it's just because he doesn't know me very well. I don't know the reason...all I know is things are very tense between us.... very awkward. Still, despite my head telling me 'Quit while your ahead or quit now', I am trying to listen to my heart...I cannot help my heart. I love him, so I am determined to try & get to know him and in the very least be a friend. However, will Nikki even let me do that much? My heart says I should try, my mind screams this won't go well. I just overall don't know what I'm doing wrong!

I finish my shower with a sigh, quickly dry my hair & put on a t-shirt & sleep pants...I sigh heavily as I turn out the light & re-enter the room and quickly the tense atmosphere hits me, nearly making me stagger. Nikki doesn't seem to notice, I mean he is still awake...the tv is on some movie channel, not that he's paying attention as he seems to be absorbed in writing something or other. Lyrics maybe? Nikki Sixx really doesn't get enough credit for what a brilliant lyricist he is and an amazing bassist as well.

I gulp as I make my way to my bed, slip under the covers grab a book & start reading.

Should I say something? Anything? How much of this can I deal with? Tours can be stressful enough but having Nikki Sixx as a roommate is even more stressful and really, we've just barely gotten started on this tour, haven't been at it long at all. I feel like pulling my hair out NOW as it is.... maybe I should talk to Eric or something? I get the feeling everyone else has really hit it off with their roommates, damnit!

My phone buzzes with a text & I groan as I set my book aside & I feel Nikki's gaze on me though I don't dare look in his direction...glancing at my phone: Eric. His timing is uncanny, the man must have ESP.

Eric: Hey Tommy, thought I'd check in and see how you were doing with your roommate. Mick & I are getting along great, seriously the man is amazing!

Me: Do I really have to answer how it's going?

Eric: Yes! (Insert eye roll emojis)

Me: Emojis, really? What are you 12?

Eric: Tommy, don't avoid the question.... Wait, let me guess...

Me: Whatever Nosy! It's awkward as hell, ok? He's so fucking intimidating...he acts like he can't stand me. I keep feeling him looking at me though. I just don't get it! I don't know what I'm doing wrong! Still maybe I should keep trying you know.

Eric: Tommy.... Tommy, I know you love him, just please be careful. I don't want to see you get hurt. Do what you feel is right but remember everyone has their limits & I can tell your already close to yours. Stand up for yourself, ok?

Me: I will try my best Eric.... now let me go. I need to try & sleep...if I can anyway.

Eric: (sighs), Ok.... but I'm here if you need me, ok? And think about what I said...and try & get some rest.

Me: Ok Eric & thanks man!

Eric: That's what family is for & you are family.

I put down my phone & put it back on charge when suddenly the source of my anxieties, my love speaks...startling me, making me jump slightly...

"So, who was that? Kind of late don't you think?" I gulp...Nikki, kill me now.

"Eric was just texting me to say hey and yeah I guess it's late." I sigh my eyes on my book. Why does he care anyway?

"Oh, Singer huh?", there's an unmistakable edge to his voice & is that jealousy I hear in his tone?

"Yes Eric...sorry to have disturbed you.", I say with cheerfulness I Don't feel.

"Whatever.... just keep it down.", He snaps. Ouch! And what the Fuck? Who pissed in his cornflakes?

"Nikki its not like I was on the phone, ok? And really man I'm sorry...so sorry", I whisper the last part quietly and slam my book on the side table and turn so my back is facing him and I sob quietly into my pillow, and I drift off....

"You know what? You can go fuck your self Sixx!!" I screamed. "I don't know what the fuck I did to you...really I don't! I've tried so hard despite you being the world's biggest asshole to be nice to you, to be a friend....do you really hate me that much?"

"Tommy, get off my fucking back! I didn't ask for this.... didn't ask for YOU! Just leave me the hell alone!", Nikki screams back at me eyes blazing.... something else too is in those eyes but all I SEE is red.

"Well, Sixx, not like you've made it easy! No! This attitude of yours is bullshit! Know what? I'm done.... you'll get your wish allright...I'm done...I'll leave you alone allright, you can have a room to your damn self! And guess what else? I quit.... I'm done with this tour.... done with you!! You can go to hell.... Everyone has limits and I've surpassed mine, greatly. I wish things were different that you didn't hate me...but you will never know...never know how I've really felt about you." My chest is heaving....and my bangs cover my eyes and stupidly I look up to see Nikki looks stunned. Eyes wide.... I turn on my heel quickly, but not quickly enough for I hear...

"Tommy I-I— ", Nikki stammers.

"Save it!! I don't care, I don't want to hear it! Fuck off!" I snap and flip him off over my shoulder.... 

then the scene shifts....

"Eric, Mick...look.... I have to for the sake of my sanity...what little there is left ...go....", I sob rocking myself back & forth like a child.

"Tommy...don't do anything hasty. Don't go...please.... We will do whatever we have to be here for you. We can get you a separate room, just please stay if not for him for us...please....", Eric pleads.

"Eric is right Tom.... I know you well enough to know you wouldn't want to let the fans down, that Kiss is your life. Fuck Sixx.... but do what you feel is best in the end...", Mick says earnestly.

"Ok, I'll stay for you guys, for the fans...not for HIM.... I still love him, but I am so hurt.... I just want to forget. I'm not going to talk to him if I can at all help it, not unless I must. I am gonna go find a bar or something.... not the best idea but I don't care.", I am so drained and despite Mick & Eric, both telling me not to go to a bar, I don't listen.... what's the worst that could happen? I just want to forget, that's all.... but I feel I won't. Alcohol only amplifies emotions and is like a truth serum of sorts....but I am going to try & forget. I head out of the room and head to the bar down in the hotel lobby...to lost in my thoughts & emotions to notice someone is following me...

A/N: I cannot wait to hear your thoughts on this!! Dreams at the end or foreshadowing? Poor Tommy doesn't know the real reason why Nikki is being harsh to put it mildly....