BILLET-DOUX ✦ CLASSIC ROCK

63 - roger waters ⁴

For Howdyhoneighbor .
❪❤︎❫
After nearly a month of dealing with Roger's moody temperament during the writing of a new album, you had finally had enough. He hadn't been consistent once, either becoming clingy or distant, loving or cold. That was Roger. He worked in extremes. You had to have all the patience in the world to deal with him, and right now, you just didn't have it in you to handle him.

He wouldn't eat, he barely slept. You couldn't even convince Roger to leave his room, let alone talk to you! There was no breaking through his walls this time. He had built them higher than you could reach, and you had grown far too frustrated to keep trying to scale them. It became easier to just ignore Roger's presence in the house than entertain him and, though you missed seeing him, it kept fights at bay and (you hoped) speeded his writing process up a bit.

Instead of begging Roger to finish his supper, you just made extra and wrapped it up in the fridge. Eventually, it would turn up missing, and you could rest easy knowing that Roger was at least sustaining himself with something. But with all of your methods of handling Roger in this stage, none of them prevented his confrontations and blow-ups that came out of nowhere. You were the only other person he could take his problems out on, and Roger never hesitated to throw all of what you did for him back in your face.

He was cruel when he thought that he deserved the isolation, pushing you away with insults that stung and keeping you at an arm's distance. You gave Roger time to come crawling back with the usual apologies, only to return to his room again and disappear for days on end.

It was one of Roger's distant days today. Despite your best efforts in making his favorite breakfast and brewing countless pots of tea, Roger hadn't ventured farther than his music room. You busied yourself with cleaning the kitchen and scrubbing down the floors. It was enough to distract you from the hurt still lodged in your heart. As much as you tried to deny it, there was a bitterness welling up inside you, but you were quick to push it down again and again.

"It'll be fine," you murmured to yourself as you wiped down the counter that had already been cleaned the day before. "He'll be fine."

Regardless, you were worried. The threat of your relationship sinking for good, of Roger isolating himself entirely, still loomed large in your psyche. What if he just never came back out? What if this was the day he'd leave for good?

You scrubbed a little harder, your knuckles turning pearl white and bulging against the thinness of your skin. Distraction was the game here, and you were a master at it. Cleaning the flat fifteen times over was a better passtime than brooding about your relationship taking a nosedive. It was better than moaning and groaning about someone who was too busy to see how you truly felt.

A thud could be heard from the music room. The first noise in what seemed like hours. You tensed up slightly, expecting the rumble of Roger's voice to follow. A curse perhaps, or maybe a call of your name. Nothing came. Your shoulders slowly sagged, betraying your disappointment.

With a sigh, you continued to scrub.

By the time you finished cleaning the kitchen from top to bottom, the sun had set well past the horizon and your stomach was growling in protest from the lack of food. You cleaned up the room temperature cup of tea that was meant for Roger and began the menial task of preparing a simple meal for yourself. You really weren't in the mood for much more than a grilled cheese sandwich, if you were being honest. It was a comfort food that would get you through the long night and empty bed ahead of you.