Alette

15: his girl's pink lemonade

F I F T E E N

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Alette's POV

"I'm meeting Josephine campus soon, they're going to show me around so that I can make my final decision about switching over from online school," I told Dr. Esa, who sat in front of me, a smile on her face.

She nodded, "That's a great idea. It would be smart to look at the environment before making the decision to start going. You'll feel more secure and less anxious about your decision."

I hummed in agreement, twiddling my thumbs in my lap, and looking out the window. I thought about what I wanted to say next.

"I went to Reece's house a few days ago," I started, "Reece is Aresius, that's what I call him."

Her face morphed into understanding, and she waited for me to continue.

"We cooked together and watched a movie. I wasn't afraid of being alone with him in his house," I paused, "I mean I was scared at one point because there was a scary movie on, but I wasn't scared of him, I've never been scared of him."

She smiled kindly at me and I returned it, feeling proud of myself.

"I saw him again two days ago as well. He dropped me off to work, and then he was supposed to pick me up, but something came up so I went to see him in his office," I mumbled, reminding myself to not reveal any details about his work.

"We talked and um then we hugged and then he..." I turned red, fidgeting my hands faster. My lip wobbled, suddenly I felt overwhelmed. "I'm confused Dr. Esa."

"What about Faye?" she asked gently.

"I just...I don't know honestly. I've never been with anyone before like that so I don't know how I'm supposed to feel. But I think I..." I trailed off, taking a deep breath, and finally admitting it, "I like him."

She kept her face passé, waiting for me to clarify.

"I like him. But there's two problems: I don't know how to do this whole relationship thing and," I took a breath, "I don't know if he feels the same way."

There. I said it. What I was the most afraid of.

Dr. Esa looked at me for a few moments, checking to see if I was going to say anything else.

When I didn't, she took off her glasses and leaned forwards in her seat.

"That's a very valid fear that you're having Faye. We can hardly just look into someone else's mind and figure out how they're feeling, so it makes sense that you're apprehensive," she took a breath, carefully choosing her words.

"I think that there's a lot of bravery that goes into being vulnerable. With that being said, why don't you just rip off the proverbial Band-Aid and ask him?"

She must have seen my look of horror and hastily continued, "I know I have asked a lot of you recently, with all the self reflection and talk of going to school in person, but I truly believe that you are beyond capable of doing all that I have asked you. The fear that's holding you back will only hold you back as long as you let it."

She was right.

She cleared her throat, "There's no harm in letting him know how you feel. Life is fleeting, and if the outcome of your confession isn't something that you wanted, and hey, if anything, you can just ignore him for the rest of your life and never look back. But at least you'll know, you were honest about your feelings," she finished, her tone humorous.