Hetalia Oneshots/ drabbles

Sublime (Cardverse Itapan)

Beautiful, reserved, graceful, perfect, those were most common the words people used to describe the queen of hearts. He despised when people referred to Kiku as perfect, they couldn't be more wrong, their words were coated with lies, veiled with uncertainty and naivety.

Felicaino had repeated those words a long time ago, he had made the same mistake as everyone else, in those times the queen of hearts was like an ethereal entity for him, an idea, a symbol of the kingdoms' grandiosity.

It was only until he became the jack that the translucent, blurry presence of the queen became a part of his cotidianity. As the new chosen jack, Feliciano had to learn how to behave, how to look and how to be around the royals.

It was no easy task, he was accustomed to his simple lifestyle. He had to dress properly, the layers of clothes were uncomfortable, the heart emblem on the fabrics seemed overused, almost ridiculous.

He had to eat his words as the tailor reprimanded his refusal to wear the puffy lower garment. "King's orders" he repeated bitterly as he fumbled with the buttons of his coat. Feliciano was led into the dinning room, that day, he would finally meet the King and Queen of hearts.

The large doors opened and his feet stumbled on the polished floor, a screeching sound announcing his arrival. Feliciano's face grew warmer as a soft chuckle escaped from the dinner table, followed by a cough.

With slow steps he approached, not daring to look up, a small bow, that's what they had told him to do. He spared a hesitant glance , meeting the King's stern stare, a motion with his hand and Feliciano moved swiftly to the seat assigned to him.

As the food was served, silence engulfed them, Feliciano wondered if it was always this way. The clustering of silverware and the shifting of fabrics were the only audible sounds. With the excuse of glancing at the food displayed, Feliciano dared to raise his stare, the king's face didn't seem to change at all, like a marble statue, cold and perpetual.

His eyes traveled to the side, the queen was as serious as him but he did meet his gaze, offering a small smile. Feliciano's heart skipped a beat and he averted his gaze, not raising his stare for the rest of the dinner.

As the days passed, the pressure of acting accordingly seemed to vanish, he no longer had to repeat the instructions on his head, his body was adjusting to the mannerisms, performing them mechanically. The less he cared about every single detail about his stance, the more he was able to perceive in the palace.

He noticed the stiffness of the royals, the hesitation they displayed with every step and Feliciano relished in the idea that just as him, they had to learn and act. Everything was an act. This knowledge gave him a certain power over the situation, he became the disruptive element in their play, stumbling upon the queen on his matutine walks around the garden and forcing the King to chat with him or at least acknowledge him on the evening tea.

A dull ache on his chest was bothering him, Feliciano had no idea why but the time he had to spend by himself was tortuous. In order to lull his ache, he tried to follow them everywhere, noticing that his pain was soothed around the queen.

One of the guards had told him it was the effect the queen had on people, he could lure anyone into his grasp if he wanted, though that was merely a rumor. As the string attached to his heart started to tug harder, Feliciano started to wander around the places the queen frequented, serving as a wordless spectator and offering his company.

He discovered the royals had names, families and interests aside from the Kingdom's affairs. Just like them, Feliciano shared his own thoughts, he grew closer to them, their shared diners no longer silent, their talks less stiff but the friendly atmosphere seemed to only flourish when he was present. That unveiled a handful of questions for him.

Hearts was a kingdom tightly linked with the idea of love. The monarch had to engage in the activities a marriage demanded of them and until now, Feliciano hadn't questioned that unspoken rule, but how could one force two people to love each other? Certainly, that wasn't the case here, Kiku seemed more willing to marry the roses in the garden than to spend more time than necessarily with Ludwig. As for the latter, he didn't seem to pay heed to the matters of the heart.

For Feliciano, the idea of love was haunting, deep inside his thoughts he knew he was falling in love but it was as scary and daunting as the time he discovered he'd be the jack of hearts. The ache on his chest grew stronger each day until he could no longer take it, barging into the queen's chamber, his breathing ragged and his hands shaking. Kiku gave him a small smile, lowering his eyes and motioning at him to sit.

Feliciano did but his heart only hurt more, with a shaky voice he said. "I love you."

Kiku sighed, enveloping him in his arms and running a hand through his hair. "I am deeply sorry, I didn't want to cause you such distress."

Feliciano basked in a smell of soft, sweet tones that he could not name, perhaps that was just Kiku's scent. He buried his head on his shoulder, the ache in his chest disappearing slowly.

"I didn't mean for this to happen and I understand if you do not feel as you are saying." Kiku hummed, pulling him away. "You are only saying it because you're bound to, because I grew fond of your presence, and now, my power is bringing you closer as it is what my heart wants but you do not love me. You must be thinking I'm perfect, beautiful and kind but that is far from the truth, I am neither of those things."

"I do, I mean what I said." Feliciano's hold grew tighter, how could Kiku say those things? "You are silly, uptight, you have an unruly strand of hair that parts the other way, your feet stumble on the garden by the gardenias with that stupid rock that nobody thinks of moving and you are cruel, so very cruel for pushing aside my feelings and yet, I love you all the same."

As he pulled away to gaze at Kiku, he found his heart relieved, the words basking him with peace, the ache was gone yet it was replaced with a growing anxiety as Kiku observed him.

Feliciano fidgeted with his hands, offering Kiku a small smile that was met with an equally shy one. His hands shook as he caressed Kiku's cheek, their lips meeting for a brief moment.

"I love you too." Kiku said, pushing them closer to kiss again, this time Feliciano smiled through the kiss, his stomach fluttering with excitement.

Sublime, that was a better way of describing Kiku. Sometimes Feliciano was afraid of how much he loved him, of how much he yearned for his company when they parted, but he no longer ached hurfully for his love.

A/N: This one was written for itapan week.