lust, sanzu haruchiyo.

chapter eleven: use me

YOU CAN USE ALL OF ME, it was clear I wanted more, so when the Haitani brothers faced me when I opened the door, I wanted to pull the trigger.

"Ice cream?" Ran raised the plastic bag that contained the sweet treat. "Where's (Name)?"

The siblings entered our place, inviting themselves in, Ran immediately placing the bag on the counter before walking over to our bedroom door. "(Name)?"

"Holy shit!" Ran looked back at me, the bedroom door now open, his scream leaving his brother in confusion. "So y'all were having sex?" he raised an eyebrow, laughing before shaking his head, "expected."

Smiling, I replied, "yeah, wanna watch? Cause we were kind of in the middle of it."

Rindou whistled, "sounds amazing, (Name), come out," he called for you, already aching for ice cream.

The brothers made themselves comfortable, grabbing their own spoons and distributing them. You walked out the room, legs still sensitive as you looked around in confusion, "had fun?" Ran asked, taking a spoonful of green tea ice cream and placing it in his mouth. 

"Yes, now what are the flavours we have?"

"We got chocolate, strawberry, mint chocolate, pistachio, and coffee," Ran placed all the ice cream containers on the counter, giving me a spoon as you walked closer after asking the question. "Which one do you want?"

Walking over to me, you wrapped your fingers around my arm, "coffee please," you leaned over, grabbing the ice cream and opening it. "What brings you two here?" you asked out of curiosity.

I looked at you, noticing how you still wore the black shirt, your shorts now on you. "Planning," Ran smiled, placing the folder on the kitchen counter, "so what's the plan, boss?"

"We don't know how many Black Molasses members there are," the brothers listened, having their cold treat in their mouths. You pulled me down, placing the spoon in my mouth to give me a taste of what you had, "thank you, darling," I mumbled, opening the folder to reveal a piece of paper with missing information about the gang. "The place where their leader was last seen," I pointed at the words printed on the paper.

It's times like this where I realize my sanity could break, "we'll attack before they can," I spoke. Looking at Rindou, I smiled, "I'll have you and your team focus on snipers," placing the folder down, "you'll be on my team, we're gonna need to talk this out with Kokonoi and Kakucho."

No matter how much I crave danger, I still want you. I want you safe, and to do so, I had to stay sane. "Finish up, I'll be swallowing pills in the bedroom," I waved my hand, walking towards the bedroom before being called by your voice.

"Haruchiyo," your sweet tone was replaced with an annoyed one, "what did I say about doing that shit in the bedroom, get your fucking ass in here."

Your hand wrapped around my arm, pulling me back into place. Rindou pressed his lips together, swallowing his laugh, not wanting to disrespect his boss – Ran on the other hand, laughed and looked away, "c'mon Sanzu, you got a wifey now, she's the boss here."

You stayed in the kitchen, hand holding a spoon while you fed yourself. It was like we weren't just in the middle of having oral sex before we were disturbed by other Bonten executives. "We should do something together," you said, putting the spoon in the sink and throwing the container in the trash, "what should we do?"

"You should start cooking dinner, I'm starving."

"We just had ice cream."

"That's not a meal, Rindou."

Pouting, I looked at you, "we should have sex," I playfully suggested, only to receive a spatula that I had to catch as you threw it at me.

"Haruchiyo!"

"Yes, dinner it is."

The brothers vowed to help. Fucking liars, all they did was fuck around while you made pasta, "Sanzu, your turn," Ran passed the whisk to me. Balancing it on my palm with its end, "one… two… three… four…"

I felt a push, making me drop the whisk, "hey!"

"All of you, you're all going to starve," you declared, finishing up the pasta and placing it on a huge plate. Placing it on the table, you only took one plate, leaving us out, "you can start by placing all those kitchen tools back into place," the carbonara's scent made me hungry, and the way you slurped it into your mouth didn't help.

Kitchen tools were everywhere, we had the ladle, whisk, rolling pins, knives, and almost anything you could name. "When the fuck did this happen," I squinted my eyes, shaking my head and kicking the rolling pin that was close to my foot, "as your boss, I order you two to fix this."

The Haitani's looked at me in disbelief, "what the fuck?"

Smiling, I walked away, taking out two pills from a ziplock bag. "Grab a plate, let's go to the balcony," you said, taking your plate and moving away from the kitchen and into the balcony.

Maybe this is what I wanted. Years of living and I never had one thing that I desperately wanted, this it is – what I'm desperately fighting for, the process of creating memories with you was what I wanted. Maybe life isn't that bad without danger. I found peace in you and now I'm desperate for more.

Which one was it? Which part of you had me begging for your peace? Was it your confidence whenever you challenged me? Or your hunger for action? It was more than your body to begin with, you had me drunk on your lust and touch.

"Hey Ran," I whispered, still having the plate on my hand as I twirled my fork to get some pasta. "We're going ring shopping tomorrow," I said those words exactly when you went back into the kitchen to place yours and Rindou's plates in the sink. 

He nodded, swallowing the pasta he was chewing, "alright."

Who knew my loyalty would lie on you. A woman who was nothing but a stripper, who chased thrill and someone ended with me. You didn't fear me, not even with the signs I had of losing myself, not even when I had sick scars on the corner of my lips. 

"This is some good carbonara," Ran mumbled.

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