Crazy Over You

CHAPTER 5

JENNIE'S POV

Human faces are so weird

I'm sure you've realized it before. How different people look from one another despite being of the same race. The same species. Dogs of the same breed have always looked like me. Animals of the same group always looked similar to each other, if not identical. But people? No, they look so distinct from one another, so different

Except for twins, of course

The nose, the ears, the mouth, and the eyes. They all come crafted into different shapes and sizes, molded like a pot of clay and sculpted like the marble statues of Ancient Greek. Rough, smooth, soft, and dry, just a look, just a touch, and you can tell it's real. That it's a real person you're looking at. The emotions hidden behind an expression from the subtle changes of the muscles are a fascinating thing to look upon. Anger, sadness, worry, pain, all such can be easily recognized, easily conducted, and easily faked

They've always looked so alienated to me, despite their familiarity. It's funny how strange it looks the longer I stare at it, as it morphs and twists into something I can no longer recognize despite knowing exactly whose face it belongs to

Lalisa Manoban. I've been staring at her for a couple of weeks now in my AP English class, fifth period. I sit somewhere in the middle while she sits somewhere in the front

I really can't help it. It's as if a rope is tugging at my eyeballs to look directly at her. As if an invisible hand is forcing me to turn my head in her direction and I can never resist it. I never wanted to in the first place

She'd catch me staring sometimes and she'd throw back a vicious glare as I smiled widely at her reluctance towards me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not some creepy stalker who'd practically breathe down her neck and send her creepy messages on her phone. I don't even have her number, now that I think about it

Several weeks had passed since the fighting incident in the cafeteria since she cried silently in my room that first night. She hadn't shown that side of her since always covering it up with her obscured anger. Not that I mind. I don't like seeing her sad anyways

During those weeks, Lisa's mood mellowed out a bit ever since my mother started taking her to therapy. She was reluctant at first, lashing out against my mother and storming out of the house. I mean, I guess I'd understand why'd she be upset

My mother tried to take me to therapy once, but I never liked them because they didn't allow me to therapy them, too. I even drew all over their things when they weren't looking like a gift. I thought it'd be a nice gesture for taking their time to entertain me but they didn't appreciate it. I say 'They' because I had several of them. My mother stopped making appointments for me since then. There's only one therapist I'd talk to but he's not always available since he's busy working at some sort of institution. I visit sometimes

Despite the face-to-face talk sessions Lisa had been going to, she still seems uptight, closed, and distrustful towards others, especially me. Even though Lisa doesn't lock herself in the bathroom anymore, she still tries her best to pretend I don't exist

Although, when my mother's gone, the silence between us isn't as awkward as I thought it would be. You could say we've pretty much gotten used to each other's presence. On certain occasions, I'd somehow piss her off and she'd shove me when my mother isn't home and tell me off

She doesn't punch me though, despite the threats she makes, despite what everyone at school says about her

Anyhow, I've recently found out about a new bench that had been built behind the school and I told Jisoo and Chaeyoung to go on ahead without me. I wanted to check it out and sit on it for a while as I read my book and I wasn't going to let anyone stop me. My friends seemed immediately disturbed with the idea of leaving without me...or is it leaving me by myself? I don't know