chapter 20: my feelings

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Yuuji was at home, in his room, lying on top of his bed. He was supposed to be sleeping but he found himself just looking at the ceiling and lying awake, thinking about what just happened a few hours ago. 

Megumi kissed him.

'Happy Birthday Yuuji,' Megumi had said. 

Yuuji touched his lip. He remembered the warm sensation of Megumi's lips against his. It was a sweet kiss. It didn't last very long, but it was sweet nonetheless. The memory of it kept replaying in Yuuji's mind.

It was best birthday gift. It didn't matter that the only other people who had got him something were his dad and one other friend of his, and pretty much everyone else forgot about him. Because this was enough for him.

But the real question was, what next? 

After they had kissed, the air become a bit awkward because Yuuji didn't know how to respond, so he ended up walking Megumi home. 

And then he met Megumi's guardian Gojo, who encouraged him to confess to Megumi. But truthfully Yuuji still had some self doubts. Did Gojo really want Yuuji to confess to Megumi because they were good for each other, or just because he didn't like Sukuna? Maybe both, but who knows. 

"Maybe I'm thinking too much about it," Yuuji said out loud. "I just want to date him. I should just tell him." He resolved.

As he said it, doubts formed in his mind again because of all his confidence issues from always coming in second to Sukuna. What if Megumi rejects him? And what if Sukuna ends up ridiculing him for being rejected? It would hurt too much.

And what did that kiss mean? Yuuji thought. Was it an 'I like you' kiss, or just a 'Happy Birthday' kiss and it didn't mean anything besides that. But you don't really kiss people you only think of as a friend right? Especially when you are technically dating someone else.

Steal Megumi's heart away, Gojo had told him. Could he really do that? Yuuji couldn't win against him in anything. If Megumi had the choice between Sukuna and me, would Megumi really choose me? Yuuji thought. 

Yuuji felt like his brain was overheating from thinking too much about it. But he was also tired of doubting himself for so long. He closed his eyes, and thought about the kiss again. He wanted to kiss Megumi again. Everyday, in fact.

No matter what happens, he wanted to say it.

"I'm doing it. The next time I see Megumi, I'm going to confess."

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