𝐀𝐩𝐨𝐝𝐲𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ; 𝗠𝗲 & 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗮𝗱 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝗳𝗮𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗰

𝐶ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑋𝐼 - 𝐴𝑙𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑛𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡

⚠️TRIGGER WARNING : mentions of s*icidal thoughts further into the chapter.⚠️

𝗟𝗲𝗼'𝘀 𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄

What do i do? Fuck. This is overwhelming. I think that the best thing to do is to be honest. I don't want to ruin our friendship. He was always there for me, in my times of need. And i've rarely been there for him.

Honest.

I should be honest.

I wanna keep our friendship.

Honesty is important.

"Matthew...I...I'm sorry. I don't feel the same. I'm so sorry. But i wanna stay friends. I'm sorry."

𝗠𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘄'𝘀 𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄

My heart feels lighter. It felt better to tell him. At least we can still be friends. I'm happy that i managed to tell him.
"It's- it's fine, at least i managed to get it out and not stay stuck with it," i answered with a raspy voice, sitting up.

He smiled at me. I smiled at him. He opens his arms again, and with no hesitation, i embrace him tightly, as we're now in a comfortable hugging position. I could feel him rubbing circles on my back, as he whispered sweet nothings into my ear. After a few minutes, i finally sat up again.

Leo looks at me, and then asks, softly, "You wanna watch a movie together? We can do it at your house, since your tv is better!"

I agree to the fact that my tv is better than his.

We stand up, pack everything back up in the bags and make our way towards my house. As we arrive there, i realized that i forgot my key. Great. But wait, Alexis is home, he could open it up!

I rang on the doorbell. Took around two minutes for the door to creak open. Alexis' face had lighten up at the sight of Leo, as he skipped through me and jumped into his arms. He must've been happy.

We stepped in, as the two others immediately sat on the couch to talk about everything. I made my way towards the kitchen to make some pasta. As it was finished, i called them to the dining table.

Alexis helped me set the table, as Leo brought the bowl of pasta and the bowl of sauce towards said table.

We ate in silence. But it was a comfortable silence, and no one really minded it.

𝗧𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗱 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄

They all had finished. Everyone was still as quiet as before. Leo helped Matthew put the dishes in the sink as Alexis went up to his room. It was just the two of them now. Leo couldn't help but notice Matthew's somber expression. He was still a bit sad.

The blue-eyed male decided to embrace his Canadian friend once again, trying to comfort him, at least a bit. It worked. Matthew felt himself heat up at the touch, enjoying it to the fullest.

"Matthew...You look down, is there something else bothering you?" Leo whispered softly. Matthew always loved the way his voice sounded. So firm, yet so soft and gentle. He could listen to it all day.

"I'm fine- don't worry," he answered, quite nervously, as much as he tried to hide it.

But Leo didn't buy that. Instead, he firmly stated, "Matthew, i know when you're lying. You're my best friend, you can tell me anything, you know that."

Matthew was stuck now.

He didn't want to bother Leo with his problems, he would come off as overly dramatic.

Felt like crying.

In the end, it all ended up getting out in between sobs and sniffles.

TW: mentions of s*icidal thoughts

"I don't know- I've been feeling like shit lately, every time i look in the fucking mirror i realize that I'm so fucking ugly, fat and i don't even want to approach it anymore, I always mess everything up and i feel like everybody either hates me or pities me and it's so fucking overwhelming with the school work adding onto it and i just feel like giving everything up and just hang onto a fucking tree i-"

Leo hugged him tighter, as he listen to every word that was spilled out in between sobs and sniffles. He let Matthew slowly calm down in his arms, whispering small sweet nothings to him from time to time.

It was all quiet again.

They went to sit down on the couch. Matthew couldn't even look up at his friend, out of pure shame.

"Matthew."

"What?"

"You're not ugly. You're one of the prettiest people i've ever met. Who ever told you that?"

"A lot of people. Throughout the entirety of my life. And they're right."

"No they're not."

"..."

Another tight hug. This time it was Leo's turn to shed some tears.

Why hadn't Matthew told him sooner?

He felt powerless. Useless. He couldn't do anything but listen. He didn't know how to handle this type of situation. Besides trying to comfort the person.

Powerless.

"Mattie, it's gonna be okay. I promise. I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you. No matter what."

...