Aftermath // 5SOS Fanfic // Ashton Irwin

The Gun

Claire's POV: Reasoning with Joy is a bad idea.  Going back to Jake's house to do so is a worse idea.  And Ashton going by himself is the worst idea of them all.  That's why, despite my better jugement, I follow him up the front steps to the mansion.

With his bruised ribs and my lack of sleep, we are not ready to do this.  But neither of those thing are getting fixed any time soon, so the best option for now is to ring the doorbell and pray Joy is the one who answers.  That's the best plan either of us could come up with.

He squeezes my hand on the second stair to the top and freezes.

"Are you ready?" I ask him.

He drops my hand and grabs my waist.  He kisses me hard.  His lips pressed against mine, I almost forget where we are and why.  I don't want to pull away, but I do.  "Ashton, we should-"

"Just wait," he says, not even bothering to finish the word before pressing me to him again. Pulling away, he takes my face in his hands and kisses the tip of my nose.  "I'm so sorry, Claire."

"It's okay.  All of it.  It's all okay."

"No.  It's not.  I shouldn't have come into your life.  We should just go."

"No, Ashton.  We came here for a reason.  I love you.  Nothing you said or did or say or do could ever change that.  You have ghosts, but, you know what?  So does everyone.  They don't look the same, but everyone is the same in this: no matter what, if you've got love in your life you're doing okay."

"Do you forgive me though?" he whispers.  "For all of the messes I've made?"

"Do you need my forgiveess?"

He nods.

"Well, I disagree, but yes.  I do forgive you.  Even though, to me, you have a clean slate.  You are not a mess.  And if you are you're my mess, and all of your messes are mine."

It's dark but I still see the glimmer of a tear in his eyes.  He starts to say something, but my lips beat his this time.  With that final kiss, he reaches for the doorbell.

An eerie, sick feeling comes back to my stomach then lodges in my throat.  Trying to bring his courage up almost made me forget my own terror for a moment, but here it is again, clawing it's way through my system.  I haven't breathed in a while.  My heart is trying to escape its cavity, and everything I've ever eaten is inching its way up my body to the back of my mouth.

Messy blond hair peeks out of the door.  "Ashton, are you crazy?" Joy whispers furiously.

"I came to make peace."

She shaes her head, incredulous.  "Peace is a child's daydream now.  If Jake sees you, he'll use that gun."

"But-"

"Ashton, you need to leave now," she warns through gritted teeth.  Footsteps echo behind her.  "Please, just go."

I look at him nevously.  I know he won't leave without doing the right thing first.  He is going to try to reason with Jake.  I know it's useless, but this is where I belong.  Supporting him.  Protecting him.  I'm staying by his side until the end.

"Is that him?" I hear an angry voice growl.

"Jake, please-" Joy starts.

"Shut up!  What are you doing with him this late?"

"It's not like that!"

Ashton tries to explain, "I'm so sorry.  I just came to try to make things right."

I hear some sort of struggle behind the door and see Jake cast Joy aside.

I don't think.  The moment I see the gun, my mind shuts down.  I just shut my eyes and jump.