Aftermath // 5SOS Fanfic // Ashton Irwin

I'm a Big Girl, Ashton

Ashton's POV: I wake up shaking. Luke, Michael, Calum, and Claire stand in the doorway. "Are you okay?" Calum asks.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You were screaming. A lot," Michael says.

"Yeah. Bad dream."

"Must've been more like a nightmare," Calum replies.

I nod. "Go back to bed. It's okay."

Everyone leaves hesitantly, glancing back at me nervously. Claire doesn't make it out the door. She just stands there looking at me. She doesn't say anything. Maybe she wants to, but she doesn't.

I look back at her. I almost ask her to stay, but I can't. There's no way she'll sleep if I ask her to. I want to protect her,but she's trying to protect me too. "Go to sleep, Claire."

"But-"

"Go," I insist, desperately wishing I had the strength to get up and kiss her before she leaves. But I can't. So I just watch her leave. Then I lie alone in the dark again, staring at the empty doorway. After what must've been hours, I slip out of bed, grab my half-packed bag, and creep out the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" Claire's voice sounds through the darkness.

"Claire? Why aren't you asleep?"

Her face becomes clearer as she walks toward me. "You really think I could sleep when you're like this?" I shift me weight from foot to foot. "Now answer me. Where are you going?"

"I just... I just don't want anyone to get hurt. I'm going to reason with Joy. Maybe she'll convince Peter to leave me alone."

"No," she says plainly.

"What do you mean 'no'?"

"I mean I'm not letting you go. Not alone at least."

I sigh impatiently. "Claire-"

"Ashton. You. Aren't. Going. Alone."

"And you aren't getting hurt!"

"I'm a big girl, Ashton. I know the risks I'm taking. I love you, okay? That's all that matters. I'm not going to get hurt."

"You don't know that," I whisper.

She takes my face in her hands and kisses me hard. I try to pull away, but I can't. I need her kiss. I need the feel of her arms wrapping around me and my hands on her waist. When she pulls away, I need her breath on my skin as she speaks softly with her lips close to my face. "Let me stay with you."

I know I should insist she stay with Michael, but I'm afraid of not being with her. I nod slowly. She smiles into one last kiss then laces her fingers in mine, and together we walk into the night.