Ch 9 - The Day I Lost You

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ATTENTION RADISH READERS! Please don't leave any spoilers in here or you'll be getting a spanking from Alfie. Or Elliot. Or Keira. Whoever you'd prefer. 😘


TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter contains themes that some of you may find distressing.



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This was it.

A shiver of excitement ran through me and I wrapped my arms around myself. I could hear distant chattering, other designers as excited as I was as they saw their plots for the first time. Seasoned designers, award-winning designers, and I was one of them.

But I wasn't alight with easy laughter as they were, I was overwhelmed, feeling like I might choke on the lump in my throat. I was standing in the empty space that was going to hold my structure for the show. It wasn't much, far smaller than the other plots, but I didn't mind. I was a seed and the other designers were fully grown trees, it made sense that my plot was smaller.

For so many years I had wanted this but now I was here...could I really pull this off? I didn't feel ready. I clasped my mum's locket, rubbing my thumb over the glass as I had so many times. In my mind I could imagine her gentle hand guiding me as she'd taught me to sketch flowers when I was little. That's all this was. Just sketching flowers like I had a million times.

I sat down in the middle of the space and pulled out my sketch book. It was time for me to start growing my roots. I began with a brainstorm and after an hour I had a sketch book that looked like it belonged to an inpatient at a psychiatric facility.

"Hello, trouble."

I started at the familiar Irish brogue. "Riley! What are you doing here?" I asked as he took a seat next to me, handing me one of the two coffees he had brought with him.

"I wanted to check in. I tried calling you but your phone was off, so I called your office and they told me you were here." He gave me an affable smile that had me feeling suspicious.

"You just wanted to check in, huh? How's my sister?"

"Prickly. Beautiful, and an amazing mother, but yeah, prickly." He rubbed a hand over his chin where stubble was starting to grow. "She gave me some of Ryan's baby pictures, though."

"That's good." I was glad she was letting him in, even if it was at a snail's pace. Riley frowned at his coffee cup. Something was eating him. "So when you said you wanted to check in, what you actually meant was...?" I let my question trail off as Riley took a deep breath.

"I want you to tell me everything about my son."

I'd so hoped he wasn't going to ask me that.

"Riley, I can't. I'm sorry. This is all between you and my sister, I can't step over her boundaries like that." My heart sank at the crushed expression on his face. Oh hell... "He likes stories. Reading them and writing them. He's also super competitive and has a habit of burying your stuff in the garden. We're hoping he'll grow out of it soon," I said quickly, Riley chuckled to himself. "What's funny?"

"I was a mischievous little bugger too. "

"For what it's worth, as crazy as this all is, I'm really glad that Ryan has you as a dad. Just be patient with Natalie. The last ten years haven't been easy."

"Alright...thank you." He rubbed a hand over his jaw again. "I guess this makes us family, eh?"

Family. Riley was a permanent fixture in my life now.

"Riley, I just have to ask, have you told Alfie yet that you're Ryan's dad?"

"No. I didn't want to give him any ammunition." Ammunition? "I'm not an idiot, Lola. I know he's a massive manipulator. But he's a permanent part of my life and you are now too. If he knew you and I were connected he could use that as leverage to get you back."

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