Self Inflicted

9

After seeing the baby, Andrea decides to leave so we found an extra car for her to take. We all stand outside in the courtyard with our weapons on hand in case things go south again. Glenn drives the car up to Andrea and the rest of us and she turns to Rick. "Can you spare it?"

"Yeah," Rick grumbles. Andrea swings her blonde head around and looks at all of us, Michonne and I for the longest amount of time.

"Well take care," and with that she climbs into the car. I scoff and shake my head, Michonne just glares at her.

"Andrea," Rick calls and walks up to the window of the car, handing her her gun and bag. "Be careful."

"You too," she breathes and starts the car, pulling away. Merle opens and shuts the gate quickly with a load screeching and we watch her drive away past the yard full of walkers. We all hurry back inside afraid of what's lurking behind the trees outside.

-

It's dark now, we started a small fire inside the cell block and I'm sitting beside Michonne on a bucket cleaning my gun. Daryl and Hershel stand beside each other about 15 feet away and Rick walks down the stairs holding his babygirl. Maggie sits on the stairs and Beth is sitting by the fire with Glenn and carol. Then, Beth begins to sing.

"They hung up a sign in our town, if you live it up you won't live it down. So she left Monte Rio son, just like a bullet leaves a gun." I know it and I used to dabble in singing from time to time, so from my spot I join in.

"With charcoal eyes and Monroe hips, she went and took that California trip," a few people snap their heads in my direction out of shock and Beth gives me a small smile. "And the moon was gone and her hair like wind, she said don't look back now just come on Jim. You gotta hold on, hold on, you gotta hold on. Take my hand, stand right here you gotta hold on. Well he gave her a dime store watch, and a ring made from a spoon. Everyone is looking for someone to blame, if you share my bed you share my name. Go ahead and call the cops, you don't meet nice girls in coffee shops."

With that I stop singing, letting Beth take it away with her beautiful light voice. "I didn't know you had that in you," whispers Michonne below the singing.

"There's a lot you don't know about me," I don't meet her eye contact and keep looking at the dancing flames.

-

At some point I fell asleep last night in my cell with Michonne. When daylight breaks it's time to get up and Rick tells Michonne he wants to take her on a run with him and Carl. "Hey, you be careful out there," I say to her.

"I'll be fine." I nod my head and watch her climb into the car with Rick and Carl.

-

I'm going to try to find Hershel. Hopefully, my arm is good enough to take this makeshift sling off. I find the old man sitting on one of the tables in the cafeteria of our cell block and I sit beside him.

"How's it feeling today?" He asks. His voice is soothing, he just sounds like a father no matter who he is talking to, never like a stranger.

"It's alright, just hoping I can take this off today and try to strengthen it back up." He unties my sling and my arm is sore so I move it around slightly. It's pulling at the stitches but they honestly don't hurt too much. Hershel pulls down the collar of my shirt and examines my stitches.

"I think the stitches can come out," Hershel says, grabbing a pair of tweezers and getting to work pulling them out. I can feel them coming out but they don't hurt. Once he has them all out, he sets down the tweezers and looks at me. "What was it like when you were there?"

"He is a bad man, the governor," I start and clench my jaw. "I watched him kill a soldier, we all did. And the more Michonne and I looked into things, the more we found out about him. He had all of those people fooled, including Andrea. We tried to tell her but she wouldn't listen, so when we left she chose to stay. Then he sent Merle to kill us," as if on cue Merle strolls in the room.

"Don't worry sweetheart, it was nothin' personal," his rough voice chuckles. "I actually wanted to pull some moves on you but the governor called dibs. If you would've stayed, you would've been in Andrea's spot."

"I never would've stayed and I never would've shacked up with that asshole," I spit.

"So you're telling me you would've shacked up with me, we can make that happen," he walks forward casually. Before I have the chance to reply Daryl walks in from the court yard and walks in front of Merle.

"Stop being a pig," he grunts as he passes. Merle shoots him a look but retreats and walks back into the cellblock.

-

All day I've been stretching and doing small exercises for my shoulder so I can get it stronger. It feels pretty good, I can hold up a gun with both of my arms which means I'm useful again. It's starting to get dark when they get back and they come back with a lot of guns, bags full of guns and ammo. They gave me an AR-15 with a couple extra clips that I keep on me at all times now, plus my pistol.

Daryl and I are left at the tables with the leftover guns and ammo to pack it into the bags. We're going to keep them in a safe spot in case of an emergency so we can get to them quickly. I'm packing ammo and slice the somewhat comfortable tension. "Is he with us? Your brother?" Daryl shoots me a look with icy blue eyes.

"Are you? You the stranger," he grumbles.

"Maybe, but I was never with the governor. Your brother was," I shake my head and continue packing.

"Well now he ain't. He's with me, with us," Daryl growls and storms out of the room with the bag of guns. Once I'm finished, I dropped the ammo off of the same spot Daryl dropped the guns stashed away by the door and go into my cell. Michonne is sitting on the edge of the bottom bed and taking her boots off.

"How was it?" I ask, sitting on the bed and leaning against the wall.

"We found a man, some guy that saved Rick's life at the start. He tried to kill us at first," she exhales. "He had all of those guns and more, for just him. He had lost it."

"Jesus."

"I think they're getting used to us," she looks at me and speaks quietly. "I like that boy, he reminds me of Andre."

"Andre would've loved it here," I give her a pitiful smile. She lost her son when he was a only toddler and in the most horrific way, it was horrible. She lets out a small whimper of a breath and climbs up to the top bunk to sleep. I get under the thin blanket and fall asleep staring at the cement wall.