Sam and Deena B.S.F (Before Sarah Fier)

Sam Fraser Part 12

 January

The group and I celebrated New Years at Deena's, a night fueled by apple cider and card games. What a feeling entering the new year with the people I cherish most in the world. It felt good starting anew, leaving all the bullshit in the past with Deena and being able to breathe in a fresh start with her. After Simon and Kate left Deena's at around 2:00 in the morning, Deena and I were cleaning up the mess we'd all made in the living room, before Deena's dad got home.

"Are you staying over or do I need to drop you off?" Deena asked me while stuffing a trash bag of empty cups.

"I told my parents I'd be coming home late because it's New Years, you know. They're probably gonna expect me in the morning and if they don't..." I look at Deena and her eyes trail to me and she understands.

"Nah, I get it, it's fine. We have other nights." She drops the bag and wraps her arms around my waist and leans in to kiss me. Our noses collide and we laugh and smile. I pull myself away because we're getting distracted.

"I should actually get home soon."

"Right, of course." She says with a sort of monotone, sarcastic tone.

"I had fun tonight, I did." I say, in a lighter gust. "And I'll call you tomorrow, I promise, okay?"

Deena nods while looking down and I tilt my head a little to see her eyes.

"Hey," I say with a giggle. "I love you." And she looks up to me with the brightest eyes ever.

"I love you." She mumbles all gritty. "I'll take you home now, I guess." She rolls her eyes and grabs the keys.

...

Deena kissed me goodbye and I ran to the house. The kitchen light was still on, which was unusual. Dad's so conservative with the electricity bill and never kept it on at night.

I went inside and walked to the kitchen to see what the deal was. Obviously, there was something wrong. I could feel it then. Crawling up the walls and up my spine like it was a spider I couldn't shake off, yeah, I could feel it. I thought maybe they were waiting for me to get home. Maybe they'd scold me for being out so late and then ground me and tell me to go to my room. 

As I walked I got closer to the kitchen, I hoped that that's all that was to happen. That I'd be the one in trouble and that it was nothing more. I poked my head around the corner before entering the kitchen and I saw Mom and Dad sitting at the table like normal, civil human beings.

"Hey... Sorry I got home so late. I won't do it again, I swear." They both look up to me after a few seconds of nothing, the two of them with faces of pure defeat.

"Sit down, honey." Mom said in a worrisome way. She hasn't called me 'honey' in years. I willingly sat down, given I was so unclear on what exactly was going on. Dad couldn't even look at me when I sat down. Like he was ashamed.

"W-What's wrong? Did someone die?" Mom shakes her head and looks to Dad who's stayed silent. She urges him with her eyes and he finally looks at me, his eyes strained.

"We need to talk, Samantha." He said.

"About what?" I asked back. I look at them both, getting more anxious to what this could possibly be about. But I knew then, deep down, I knew what this was about. I just didn't want to admit to myself that it was finally happening.

"Your father and I are separating. Legally." Mom said.

"Well, not legally, yet, but for now we're going to be living in separate households." Dad corrected. I'm not surprised. Genuinely, I'm not. I was just waiting for them to come face me and tell me that they were leaving each other, and to be honest, it's the fact that I was counting the days, waiting for them to come to me. That's by far the saddest part about this. I just didn't think it'd be today. It was January 1st, and this was how they wanted to finish off New Years Eve? It's like this year isn't in my cards, just when I thought it was going to be alright. My face goes cold and I feel my eyebrows naturally frowning.