911 and 911 Lone Star One Shots

Buddie/Eddie Diaz-But Still I rise

Know one truly knew what Eddie was going through, his struggles were always well hidden. His pain was something that was never talked about as Shanon refused to acknowledge his struggles always hers and Christopher's. No amount of convincing would tell him otherwise. Maybe Chris was better off with someone else, maybe Eddie wasn't the right person to raise such an amazing child. These were the things he was constantly being reminded of. It had been almost a year now of hiding self harm. It wasn't as if he was hiding it, just no one noticed. The fight club allowed him to bury the ones that he couldn't hide before.

Carla had brought Chris to the firehouse for lunch one Saturday with Maddie, Athena, May and Harry tagging along as well, Chris was asking people about there scars and now he was onto Jeremy and his old self harm scars, "How did you get them?" "Well when I was a teenager I had a rough time and I resulted to hurting myself to cope," "Daddy has the same marks, only his still bleed, he thinks I don't see them but I do," all eyes were on Eddie who was now twiddling his sleeves, "Christopher not everyone are willing to show the world there struggles okay?" "But they hurt you dad," that was enough, "Chris, Harry, why don't we go and get ice cream?" May asked, "I'll supervise," Carla added escorting the under 18's out.

All eyes were now on Eddie, Hen and Chimney had disappeared to reappear with medical supplies from the storage. "Eddie you know we aren't going to judge you," Bobby declared in a comforting way, "I just can't do it any longer," Eddie whispered choking back the tears by leaning back on his chair, "Eddie your safe here, we are not going to judge you," "But you do, you never make it verbal but I see the looks. I know I am not good enough to be a dad to someone as wonderful as Chris, but I sure as hell am trying. I just know my best effort isn't enough, so many people tell me that Chris is better off in foster care or with my parents back in El Paso. I should have listened to them instead of dragging him away from the only home he has ever known. Nobody ever cared, I was constantly being perceived as the 'man' of the house. So I've buried it for so long," "Buried what?" "The pain, the spiteful comments, the tears. All of it." Something broke down inside of him and the tears streamed down his face, they wouldn't stop no matter how hard he tried.

Buck put a comforting arm around him and Eddie practically melted into his grip. Buck always knew how to make Eddie feel better and a good hug was one of them.