A Trees Life

The Stupidest Inventions... Ever.

Okay so my buddy @anonymous_ninja was NAGGING AT ME THIS MORNING TO WRITE SOMETHING ON HERE, SO I WAS LIKE FINNNNNEEEEE! (Actually she only asked me if I updated but... ONCE SOMETHING LIKE THAT GETS IN MY HEAD I FEEL BAD UNTIL I CARRY THROUGH!! D:) So anywho enjoy moi rant-eo! ;P

SPORKS.

Probably the most stupid invention ever.

Is it a fork!? Is it a spoon?! PSH NEITHER ITS JUST A JELLY WANNABE, WHO NEEDS TO BE TAKEN BACK TO CHINA!! WHY CHINA!? BECAUSE EVERY STINKING THING I TOUCH AT STORES SEEMS TO HAVE "MADE IN CHINA" ETCHED INTO ITS SKIN.. I GET I GET EVERY MUMFFIN THING IS MADE IN CHINA!!! -.-

THE POKEY FORK-ISH PART ISNT STRONG ENOUGH TO BE A FORK (And usually breaks in half! D:) AND IF YOU USE A SPORK AS A SPOON THE SOUP/LIQUID USUALLY SPILLS OUT THE POKES!!! THEREFORE SPORKS ARE DYSFUNCTIONAL AND STUPID!!!

ANOTHER THING, -AS I HAVE STATED BEFORE- I AM QUITE OCD AND I LIKE THINGS TO BE NEAT AND ORDERLY AND PROPER. (Most days! ;P)

PROPER EDDICIT SUGGESTS THAT FORKS GO ON THE LEFT, SPOONS GO ON THE RIGHT; SO WHERE DOES A SPORK GO!? THE MIDDLE!? AWWW H*LLLZZZ NAW!!! THATS WHERE MY FOOD GOES, AND IM NOT PUTTING A SPORK NO WHERE NEAR MOI FOOD!! -.- THERE IS A REASON WHY THEY DONT HAVE A "SPECIAL SPOT" IN PROPER EDDICIT; BECAUSE THEY ARE LIKE MISFIT MUPPETS OR SOMETHING!!! AND NOT THE GOOD KIND OF MISFITS... (Like the ISLAND OF MISFIT TOYS!!! C: and I guess the band is pretty cool too... :3)

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RATS.

Now Im not talking about the little adorable rodents with chewing problems. No. I am talking about those stupid tangles in your hair that serve no purpose but to waste your time TRYING TO GET THEM OUT!!! NOT TO MENTION HOW TERRIBLY PAINFUL IT IS WHEN YOUR FRIEND WITH THIN STRAIGHT HAIR (meaning she has less rats and doesnt know that with thicker hair you must be gentle or else you end up taking out more hair than undoing rats) ASKS TO DO YOUR HAIR; YANKING AND PULLING AND DESTROYING YOUR POOR HAIR!!

 Now most people would tell them to stop, but if they never know they'll never learn. So I was sitting there near tears, trying to explain how to ACTUALLY BRUSH MY HAIR!! D': Im such a good friend... lol...

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FOUNDATION.

Okay so Im a girl. Yeah, occasionally I wear makeup. But I wear makeup that "enhances" my beauty not something that covers me up. Therefore foundation pisses me off.

 LIKE I AM BEAUTIFUL; HECK EVERYONE IS BEAUTIFUL! GIRLS, STOP CACKING YOURSELF IN MAKEUP; THAT COVERS YOU UP!!

I MEAN GUYS DONT FIND IT ATTRACTIVE -I'VE HEARD IT STRAIGHT FROM THE HORSES MOUTH (Ahaha love that idiom... ;3)-!

PLUS, IT IS SOOOOO UNCOMFORTABLE AND GROSS!!! WOULD YOU WALK AROUND WITH SYRUP OR POWDERY FLOUR ON YOUR FACE!? NOOOOO. THEN WHY WEAR FOUNDATION.

IF YOU WEAR FOUNDATION TO COVER ACNE IT JUST MAKES THE ACNE WORSE. SO JUST TAKE CARE OF YOUR FACE, AND DEAL WITH IT FOR A DAY OR SOMETHING...

PERSONALLY I only wear mascara and eyeliner; if I have acne I deal with it; use all the tricks in the book (besides foundation).  People respect that. When you dont try to hide or cover yourself.

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SCHOOL.

According to Ralph Waldo Emerson (One of my Dead Future Husbands C:) we already know everything and we just have to remember. so yeahI enjoy learning new things -Im a nerdy bird ;P- but when they spend forever on the dumbest things that we all understand or explain it wrong than move on, IT PISSES ME OFFF YO!!!

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HOMEWORK.

 DA FUQ WAS THIS CREATED!? AFTER A LONG OBNOXIOUS DAY OF SCHOOL -WHICH CONSISTS OF ANNOYING TEACHERS, BORING WORK, AND CRAZY DRAMA-  WE WANT TO SLEEP OR GO ON SOCIAL NETWORKING OR PARTAYYYYY!!! NOT DO MORE WORK!!!

THATS WHAT I CALL A BRAIN OVERLOAD!! D:

TEACHER USE EXCUSES LIKE  "OH BUT WE GIVE YOU HOMEWORK TO KEEP YOU OFF THE STREETS"

UMMMM HELLLUUURRR IF WE GO OUT WE WILL GO SOMEWHERE LIKE LASERTAGGING OR A SUPER AMAZING PARTAY... WE ARENT GUNNA SIT ON THE STREETS PRETENDING TO BE POOR OR SOMETHING... 0.O Besides IM NOT GUNNA KILL MY PARENTS ON A WEEKDAY! -.- 

TEACHERS ALSO SAY ITS GOOD "PRACTICE"...

WHAT DO YOU CALL WHAT WE ARE DOING IN CLASS?! STUFF TO WASTE THE TIME!? NO THATS JUST WRONG!!! LEAVE US CHILDREN ALONE, WE ARE YOUNG AND NEED SPACE AND FREE TIME OR ELSE WE WILL GIVE UP AND BE LIKE "F DIS SHIZZ YO!" AND THEN THE WHOLE WORLD WILL END UP WORKING AT MCDONALDS... IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT FOR YOUR FUTURE!? HUH?!

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OKayyyy so THATS ALL BYE BYE!!! If you think of any other stupid stuff invention, tell me and we can discuss whether or not it is worthy of bringing to the attention of moi readers! ;P