Love, is not for us

#17 - Restart

Tiara

"It's crazy!", I blurted, breaking the long deafening silence during the drive back to my apartment. James looks at me surprised, at my sudden exclamation.

"We're having twins, James! Twins! Double of everything.", I continued.

He took a quick glance back at me while maintaining good view on the road and he chuckles, "For a moment in there, I thought life is playing a joke on us. I hope this is the last surprise that we're getting."

And we both burst into laughter. "Are we the one turning crazy? Laughing over this?", he added.

"I need to get another nickname! Can we call the other one Plum?", I ask him.

He smirks at me, "Earlier I was wondering if you'll be changing from Blue to Plum. And now we have two of them for you to use both."

"Blue and Plum, it is.", I decided happily.

"That's just their nickname, right? I'm not having Blue Scott and Plum Scott."

"Course not!", I let out a big laugh and he gave me a smile.

The current mood is much better than the earlier drive. It was so awkward but I enjoyed seeing James getting all flustered when he accidentally rest his hand on my thigh. I was a little disappointed when he realised because it was comforting having his warmth on my skin.

I haven't laughed like this since the last 15 days. Ever since I suggested to end whatever we had. It was the most miserable time in my life. I threw myself into work, I went back to my old self. Work, work, work. If not for Anna, I might miss my meals.

Luke contacted me, and we talked everything out. He's excited to be Uncle Lukey. I know James begged or maybe threatened him to mend back our friendship. James probably kills him if he finds out that I know this. Someone needs to tell James that Luke is incapable of keeping any secrets.

I'm so happy to get my bestie back. But there's still a huge void in my heart that I know no one else can fill other than James. I miss him so much. I miss waking him up too early for his liking, tousle his bed hair, dealing his grumpiness, and even our little arguments.

"We're here.", he breaks my train of thought.

"Ohh okay. Thank you James", I smile at him politely. I need to get out of the car but my body doesn't move. The happy mood we had earlier is replaced with this awkward air.

Probably feeling the same as me, he speaks, "Your belly. It's much bigger, more prominent that before.".

"It is. I take a picture everyday with measuring tape. You know just for memories." I took them for him. But I haven't found the courage to send them to him. Does he wants to see.

"Oh yeah? Can I have a look?", he asks.

"YES! Er yeah sure, I'll send them all to you. If you want, I can also send them regularly. I do it every morning. It's okay if you don't want. Daily might be too many. I can send when it's significantly different?", I'm starting to babble nonsense. I hope he didn't realize my over excitement.

He reach out to play with my hair. He used to do this all the time. I feel at ease and safe when he does this.

"I'd love if you can send it to me daily ba-. Who else would you send to everyday? Please don't tell me it's Luke."

I giggle, "No! I don't even show him a single picture. It's too intimate for other people to see."

He smiles satisfiedly.