Anguish Love [ Vhope ]

[I don't want to remember you]

Hoseok woke up the next day with a painful headache, he looked around for his phone:" ohh shit! I'm gonna be late."

He got up quickly did his morning routine as usual but at a speed, he was wearing his shoes, when he heard his roommate coming out of his room, Hoseok asked:" yoongi, how did I get home??"

Yoongi stared at him with sleepy eyes and still yawning:" he said he is your coworker he is so good-looking *yawns* you don't remember?"

Hoseok took his bag:" I guess I forget that part, I left you some breakfast I'm leaving." He stormed running to the station.

He luckily got there on time, he made coffee for himself and went to his desk then began working.
He noticed Taehyung walking after he greeted everyone with a smile and went to his desk as well, invariably  when it reaches 11 am every section do a small meeting about the work and reports any issues or suggest ideas, Hoseok was turn to speak about his recent project so he stands there and started explaining in a very professional way, however, Taehyung kept interrupting him every instant with questions, which annoyed Hoseok, he hates being interrupted, everyone noticed it and also kinda got annoyed, no one does the perfect job like Hoseok, he rarely makes mistakes and very logical before anything, so he didn't stay quiet," excuse me but, would you please let me finish first and write down all your questions and ask me when I'm done ?" He said.

Taehyung gave him a cold glance: "But I'm just doing my job." Hoseok smirked:" We are all doing our job, and usually we keep questions at the end so please consider it."

Taehyung sighed:" sure, my bad continue Hyung."
Hoseok inhaled again and proceeded with his presentation.

At the lunch, Hoseok went to the cafeteria with his colleagues, as usual, they started gossiping about Taehyung's kinda rude behaviorr earlier at the meeting, Hoseok heard them but didn't chatter with them about him, he was talking with two of his coworkers about some other things while eating.

Hoseok peeked around, seems like Taehyung doesn't eat at the company cafeteria, anyway it's none of my business he said to himself.

After lunch, he went to his desk earlier than the others cause he had a lot work to do, he saw Taehyung still on his desk working, he was wearing glasses... How can someone get hotter while wearing glasses?? Hoseok wondered to himself.

Taehyung looked up and caught Hoseok looking at him, the other panicked and switched his vision to his computer:" Hyung." The younger said:" did I annoyed this morning?" Hoseok looked up at him again:" you did." Said honestly, cause he doesn't like to hide something that bothered him, Taehyung stood up and walked toward Hoseok's desk, he took the chair next to Hoseok and sat beside him:" I'm sorry, Hyung." Hoseok's heart flustered he felt his ears burning...

He cleared his throat:" it's fine! You don't need to worry." Taehyung gazed at Hoseok's neck, which made Hoseok quiver a little:" what are you looking at??" Taehyung extended his hand and  caressed Hoseok's neck and Hoseok slapped his hand:" what do you think are you doing??"

Taehyung:" the scar...on your neck is fading.." Hoseok's eyes widened, hands trembling, he stutters:" H-how...D-do y..you-

Their coworkers started returning to their desks and got crowded again, so Taehyung stood and left to his desk, leaving Hoseok traumatized, he wasn't feeling good the whole evening, when they finished working he exited from there as quickly as he could, when he finally got to the subway, he sat there and closed his eyes the whole time until he reached home, he walked in and went directly to his room and opened his drawer and started swallowing his antidepressant medications, he took off his clothes and lay on his chest, he felt the medications kicking as he started feeling the fatigue and weakness, his hands getting cold and mouth dry, breathing heavily, just trying to sleep...

Meanwhile, Taehyung was in his very luxurious apartment, sitting on his sofa while reading documents he mumbled:" PTSD... I see so this is why he doesn't remember me..." He took off his glasses and closed his eyes with the palm of his hands:" Hyung...ahhh I thought you were pretending that you didn't know me." He whispered in a soft, painful voice..." I miss you..."

The next day, Hoseok woke up with weak legs, he hardly can walk, he took a sip of water, and until now he noticed the note on the fridge from yoongi saying:" I have a trip for 3 days, call me when it's urgent... Jk call me anytime." He smiled a little, he wanted to call him and tell him about yesterday but he didn't wanna worry him...

After an hour and a half he got to work, he sat on his desk, looking pale, he didn't eat from  yesterday lunch, his vision was blurry but forced himself to work, at the usual meeting he berely spoke and when it was his turn to present:" i- pass, I still didn't finish I'm sorry." One of his coworkers leaned at him:" Are you okay? You are looking sick..." She said, Taehyung eyes were fixated on him since the morning he said:" you can leave if you are feeling sick, I will let the director know."

Taehyung's voice made Hoseok shiver that everyone noticed, he held himself with his hands trying to heat himself, they started calling his name but all he heard was his heartbeats slowed....its hurt...stop it please he told himself.

Hoseok finally opened his eyes and he was laying on a bed, he knows this smell... He hates it, he hates how bright it is... The hospital, I don't wanna be here... He looked on his side and saw Taehyung on a chair slicing apples, he look sad...:" Did I faint?"

Taehyung looked up at him so rapidly and went to him:" yes...the doctor said you overdosed and had no energy to fight the side effects of your medications."

Hoseok looked the younger:" I must have interrupted the work I apologize you can go back-
Taehyung:" fuck the work... I don't care about it as much as about you." He blurted out

Hoseok's heart skipped fast:" I don't remember who you are... And I don't wanna remember you... Remembering you will hurt me... I might lose my life like today... So please don't try to remind me of who you are...that what my mind wants...so I'm begging you..." Taehyung huffed as tears were falling from his eyes...:" I- I understand... I'm sorry."

Hoseok found himself unintentionally wiping the younger tears with his palm hand... He felt sorry... For him and for himself...Taehyung nuzzled his nose on Hoseok's hand with droopy eyes:" Can I take you home at least."

Hoseok smiled:" sure.."

He drove him back home and carried him all the way to his apartment's door, while the older wrapping his hands around Taehyung's neck, he felt warm...

He put him down, and stepped back:" try to eat something, Take tomorrow's day off, I already submit it to the director." However, Hoseok was still grabbing on Taehyung's shirt... Legs trembling... He looked up at The younger and hugged him:" My roommate isn't home, I can't cook, can you make me something?" He mumbled... Taehyung's heart started beating so fast, blushing from ears to cheeks ....:" of course..." He responded.

Hoseok was laying on his bed, meanwhile Taehyung was at the kitchen, trying to make something with the ingredients they have.

Hoseok sniffed... Stomach growling... He is starving.
Few minutes, Taehyung brought a plate with food:" I'm not that good cook but it's edible I swear." Hoseok chuckled, and started digging and God how can a such handsome man make the best-fried kimchi rice and also added eggs!!! Oh, he must be perfect at everything... Hoseok admired to himself.

He finished it all in a short time while the younger gazing at him, he then took the dishes to the kitchen and came back to half sleepy Hoseok:" I'm leaving Hyung.." Hoseok hummed:" mmh okay... Thank you for the food..."

Taehyung got near and brushed the hair off Hoseok's face with his large yet soft hand... Hoseok half sleepy reacted to Taehyung's touch and gleamed softly and fell asleep... Taehyung turn off the light and left.

He sat on his car, hands on the wheel and cried for an hour, before driving to his home... I don't know what to do anymore, he doesn't wanna remember me, I will only cause him pain... But what about me I have been in misery for 5 years... I sacrificed everything just to meet him... To be with him ... I wish I was dead.

[To be continued ]

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