XXIII

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I leave the library first, my legs shaking slightly. I stop in a mirror in the hallway to make sure I look like I didn't just get fucked on the library table two minutes ago. Everything seems to be intact, so I make my way back out to the party.

I stare down at my feet, but I sense a presence staring at me, so I look up. About twenty feet away from me, Ace stands in a dark grey tux with a white shirt and maroon bowtie. I stop in my tracks, and we stare at each other.

As if out of a goddamn movie, Aella comes walking out behind me, her heels clicking on the tile floors. I turn, and she's staring down at her jacket buttons, correcting them in their place. When I turn back to Ace, there's something on his face that seems to click. Then his face darkens in anger. "Wow," I hear him say. "You're a fucking d¥ke now."

"Ace", I gasp. "What the fuck. You're an asshole."

Ace scoffs, then turns around and walks away.

Emotion that I can't explain starts to stir inside of me. I loved Ace for so long, it's weird for something so negative to come from him towards me. I feel sad, and angry, and frustrated, and scared.

"Penelope", I hear Aella say quietly behind me. I turn quickly around, and I can feel the tears burning my eyes. I stare at her, and she starts to open her mouth, but I turn to run up the stairs instead.

Tears run down my face as I run up the huge staircase, my heels clacking with every step. "Penelope, wait" Aella's heels clack behind me. I run straight to my room and slam my door shut. I lean my body against my door and slide down to my butt. Aella bangs on the door from the other side. "Penelope, please open the door."

"No", I cry. "Go away."

"Come on, Penelope", she says softly. I can barely hear her over my sobs. "He's not worth it."

"He hates me", I all but scream. I cover my face with my hands and let out a scream of anger. I'm angry that I let myself do that to him. He caught me, no more than a month after we broke up, with a woman.

I sob and cry into my dress, so mixed with emotions. A moment later, I hear Aella again. "Penelope". She's crouched down on the ground on the other side of the door. "Please let me in."

I move myself a couple inches from the door and turn the doorknob. Aella pushes the door open just enough for her slide in and closes it again. I stare up at her. My makeup must be running down my face, making me look like a complete mess. As soon as we make eye contact, her face goes soft, giving me an empathetic look.

I shove my face back into my hands and let out another sob. Aella sits down next to me and wraps her arms around me, pulling me into her. One of her hands runs through my hair, consoling me the best she can. "Shhh", she consoles me. "It's okay, Baby".

After a few minutes, I stop sobbing, and just let the tears run out. I cry on Aella's shoulder, and I feel bad for her, too. She's stuck her trying to make me feel better as I'm wailing over my ex boyfriend. Even though we aren't officially dating, her and I have enough of a connection to be considered that way.

A few more minutes, and I just sort of sit there. I'm not crying. I'm just sitting there blankly. I stare at the floor in front of me, and Aella continues to run her fingers through my hair softly.

"I'm sorry", I whisper. She seems to pull me tighter to her. I squeeze my eyes shut as another couple tears make their way out.

"You have nothing to apologize for", she whispers, planting a kiss into my hair. "You have a lot of history with him. You have every right to be upset."

"I'm not... I don't know what I am", I say, sniffing back snot in my nose. "I don't love him, I love-. I shouldn't be crying over him. If he hates me, that's his problem."

"He doesn't hate you." She says calmly. "He's still trying to get over you. And you're trying to do the same."

I sit up away from her, and look over at her. "I'm over him." I say, almost offended. She gives me a "no, Hun, you're not" look. I blink at her. "I'm with you, I broke it off with Ace to be with you. I'm over him."

"You don't have to be over someone to be with someone new, Penelope." She tries he hardest to reason with me. "I'm not mad that you're not completely over him. It takes time for everyone. And you and I are not anything official. You can take as much time as you need to be ready"

"But I want to be over him.", I start to tear up again. She just stares at me, and then I start to rant. "I want to move on, and my the next chapter of my life with you. I want to go on dates with you, and have sex with you, and make love to you, and someday take another step with you. You are perfect, and I know practically nothing about you, other than that you're really good in bed. You make me feel free, and liberated, and cared for. I want to love you. I need you. I-"

I stop myself before I dig myself into an even bigger emotional hole than what I'm already in. I can't love her yet. I can't, I can't, I can't. But I do. Aella is the most beautiful person I've ever met, inside and out. She does make me feel loved, and I feel free around her to be myself.

"It takes time to get over someone you loved, Topolina", she pulls me back to her body again. Aella is warm, and comfortable to be around. 

In just the past few days, since the date, she's gone from a $exy, dominant fuck buddy, to a woman who loves me for you and who wants to care for me. She's sitting here on my bedroom floor consoling me while I cry. Someone who wants you just for sex doesn't do that.

"I need you", I repeat.

Aella places a kiss in my hair again. "I'll always be here."

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