A million miles [Billie Eilish]

Screams

"It's going to be fine," I said out loud to my unconvinced reflection, "they probably won't even notice me..." who am I kidding? Of course they will, "even if they do, it will be ok," I aggressively shook my head in an attempt to put a pause on the argument that my brain and mouth were having.

"Reese?" I heard a familiar voice yell. Great, now I look crazy.

I ruffled my hair, sent myself one last nod of encouragement then opened my dressing-room door, "hey Finneas."

He opened his arms wide and I took the opportunity to steal a hug from him, "are you spiralling?"

Yes.

"No, it's just- well, there's a lot of people out there..." I said, my voice shaky, giving away the fact that yes, I am spiralling.

Finneas chuckled lightly as he gave me a squeeze, "you will be ok Reese. Bil and I, we got you."

I nodded as I gulped down a nervous lump forming in my throat, "thank you, you better go," I looked toward the stage that was now blacked out ready for the siblings.

He sent me a smile, "see you soon."

I spent the next forty minutes talking to Claudia backstage. We'd never met before but talking to her, I realised she was like a comfort blanket to me- she kind of gets it. Kind of.

"Everybody to my left are you good?" Billie asked, holding her mic in their direction, of course the crowd screamed. She turned to her right, "everyone over here, are you good?" She asked, emphasising the good, and again, they screamed... "and you guys at the back, are you fucking good?" She cupped her ear and held out the mic again, thankfully for my ears, the screams were a little quieter from the back.

"Ok, ok, first of all thank you all for being here. This shit is crazy," she paused whilst the thousands of people cheered for her.

"Oh my god, stop!" She chuckled cutely, blushing as she patted the air down, motioning them to fall to silence.

A moment or so later the stadium finally quietened down, "ok, so..." she took a deep breath through the mic as she sat down onto a stool that security had brought out for her, "I wrote this song about someone. At the time we were going through some shit," she looked toward me, "she was going through some shit, and she didn't deserve any of it," she turned her gaze back to the audience, but seemed to be looking more toward the sky, she quickly cleared her throat, "and um- well, I didn't know how to get my emotions out to her, so I put them in a song..."

A very quick silence filled the air until Billie turned around, "so as well as saying hello to my brother, Finneas over there..."

Screams.

"And my drummer Andrew..."

More screams.

"Today we're also saying hello to a girl I never want to say goodbye to, ever again. Please welcome, Reese Marin..."