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I didn't go to school today, I'm at the airport waiting for my airplane: I come back to France, I need to be with my family for a while. I miss Marc but I don't text him because I know he is busy with MotoGP. Someone announces my airplane arrives in 5 minutes so I walk to it. I enter, I show my ticket and I go to my seat, which is next to the window. 

                                    *Hours later*

I just arrived in Paris. I miss being in France, it's my native country. I smile all alone and I take a train to Caen: my hometown, it is in Normandy. Yeah, I'm proud of being Norman. I just love being here, Normandy is my real home and I'm so happy to come back there for a while. 2 hours later, I arrive at Caen's train station and I go outside. I call my grandmother to know if she can take me, my dad is at work so he can't come for now. 

I listen to music while waiting for my grandmother. Then, I raise my head and I see my grandmother's car coming, I smile and I grab my bag. I throw it on the back seat and I sit on the passenger seat. I kiss my grandmother on her cheek and we go to her house. I missed her so much and I'm so happy to be with her. I tell her everything about my university, my new friends and also about Ruby. We arrive at her house, I help to take her stuff and we go into her house. I put my bag on the couch and I help my grandmother to clean her house. 

"Qu'est-ce que tu veux faire ?" - I ask 

"On peut aller voir mes parents." - my grandmother says

Yeah, my great-grandparents are still alive.

"Ouais, bonne idée !"

We come back to her car and this time I drive. I'm so impatient to see them, they live near the beach and I love being there. I open a bit the window because it's hot in the car. 30 minutes later, we arrive and I park the car near the house. We get out and we go into their house. I smile when I see my great-grandparents. I kiss them on their cheek saying 'hello'. I sit next to my great-grandmother, we start talking together, I love talking with them. I go in the garden and I hang out the washing, my grandmother stayed with her parents. I join them when I finished with the laundry and I tell them I'm going to the beach. I close the door before leaving and I walk to the beach. I lay on the sand and I sigh looking at the sky. I smile all alone thinking about my childhood memories here, nothing has changed. I stay some minutes lying on the sand, it's the best place in the world. Marc calls me but I don't want to talk to him, don't worry I'm not mad at him but I want to be alone. I walk coming back to my great-grandparents' house and I help them with cooking. My grandmother sets the table while I'm cooking: chicken with fries, I also do the rest of the dishes. When the chicken and the fries are done, I join my family with food. I serve everybody before sitting on my chair. We start eating and I ask my great-grandparents about their past and how they met, I'm captivated by their stories. They are amazing and I'm so proud of them and I'm so happy they are still alive. 

After having finished eating, I clean the table and I do the dishes with my grandmother. We come back to the living room and I sit next to my great-grandmother. We smile at each other and I hold her hand. We continue talking with my grandmother and my great-grandfather. I realize I didn't think about Marc since the last time I saw him, I hope everything's okay. I just know they raced for the Portuguese Grand Prix. I go in the garden and I text Marc :

"Can I call you ?" 

"No, and stop texting me."

I didn't expect that from him, I don't know how to react so I decided to not reply. I don't know what's wrong with him, I didn't do anything wrong. I sigh and I text Alex, his brother, to know what happened. He told me that Marc is feeling bad and his head hurts. I hope he will get well soon. I come back inside and I go to the bathroom. I put water on my face, I dry it and I look at myself in the mirror: why am I like this? I'm so fat, ugly. I hate myself, I try to make efforts to lose weight but it is hard. I sit on the edge of the bathtub sighing, I don't know how I feel. Mixed feelings: happy because I'm with members of my family, sad and worried about Marc. I hear my grandmother coming :

"Léanne, ça va ?" - my grandmother asks

"Oui ça va ." - I reply, grumbling a bit

" Tu viens ?" 

"Oui, j'arrive." 

I grumble again and I join them shuffling a bit. I sit on a chair and I fake a smile. I look at my great-grandmother, I love her so much. I feel sad when I see her wrinkles, I wish she could stay younger. Her hair is grey and it is also short. Fuck it!  I start overthinking again about Marc. I grimace sighing a bit. I look at my grandmother and she makes me smile. I'm close to my family, I feel so happy to be able to see them when I can. I wipe Marc from my mind and I focus on the discussion between my grandmother and her parents. I close my eyes a little bit because I feel tired. My grandmother taps on my shoulder saying we have to leave. I say goodbye to my great-grandparents hugging them a bit. 

I grab the car's key, I sit in the car and I turn it on while waiting for my grandmother. I look at the hour on my phone: 5 pm. I turn my phone off and I throw it on the back seat. I see my grandmother in the rear-view mirror. She enters the car, she sits on the passenger seat and I start driving to her place. There is this very oppressive silence, I hate it. I turn the radio on and I feel better because at least there is something which breaks that silence. 

"Je peux ouvir la fenetre? - I ask my grandmother

"Oui, tu peux." - She replies

I open it a bit and I feel the wind entering the car. We arrive at my grandmother's place and I park the car. I grab my phone which was on the back seat, I turn it on and I see I have a missed call from Alex. I will call him back later. I go out of the car and I close it before joining my grandmother in her house.

"Je dois rappeler quelqu'un. J'en ai pour pas longtemps." - I say

"Pas de soucis." - My grandmother replies

I go into her room and I call Alex.

"Cómo estás ?" I hear Alex asking

"Estoy bien y tu ?" 

"Yo tambien. Puedo hablar contigo un momento?"

"Sí."

"Quiero hablarte de Marc."

"Ok."

"No está bien y quiere verte."

"No quiero verlo, me dijo que no quiere hablar conmigo, así que no le hablo."

"Cambió de opinión."

"Yo no."

I hang up angrily and I put my phone away. Marc pisses me off and I don't know what to do.

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