WATERCOLOR || Complete

Fourty Eight

Jisung fell asleep in Changbins arms while waiting for Minho to be released. Chan was kicked out of the room after 10 minutes but Jisung was out like a light. His subtle snores against the olders chest made Changbin relax too, even if he was sore. Sitting in a wooden chair wasn't the most comfortable position, but he didn't want to disturb the youngers rest.

Changbin thought long n hard of what to say to Chan since that last time ended in being nearly choked out after abandoning Jisung, or rather breaking him.

He didn't know where to start as he looked down at the sleeping male in his arms, brushing his slightly tear stained cheeks, kissing Jisung on the forehead which he had done plently of times now. Jisung curling in closer to Changbins warmth. He rested his cheek on top of the youngers crown rocking gently.

"I'm sorry..." He mumbled against his head. "You always kept saying sorry, when I should have. I was a coward. I'm sorry."

Chan listened to the younger who admired sadly at the sleeping male. His cousin has gone through so much and he was mad at Changbin. But he couldn't just be mad at Changbin. Jisung too broke Changbin who became robotic and din't let his emotions sway. It was a two way street that the two of them had to meet halfway. One feeling more guiltier than the other.

"Changbin..."

"Mhmm?" Changbin swallowed thickly. He didn't know what Chan would say or do.

"As much as I despise you right now for leaving him alone he is attached to you. He never once stopped thinking of you. When I visited him in Malaysia he was dull, no emotion Changbin. He was like in highschool before meeting you all over again. He got into bad things, bad habits. It was so damn hard Changbin, you have no idea."

"Bad habits, you mean... Self harm right?" Changbin subtly said holding Jisung tighter, remembering the raded scars he saw on the youngers thighs while earning a small nodd from Chan. Guilt washing over him like the ocean rolling over the rocks. He couldn't imagine why the younger did this. Changbin knew himself he hated the life he lived but not once did he think of harming himself with blades. He harmed himself by other means. Segregating himself from everyone, in near isolation except for when he actually had no choice but to talk to someone.

"Accoding to Minho. He started just weeks after leaving."

"Thats why he feels guilty right now. Minho helped him out of that slump of cutting himself. I didn't know about it till maybe 5 months later. So Changbin please... Please, i'm begging you."

Changbin swallowed thickly. He was hearing one of two things. One- Leave Jisung alone or two-

"Don't let him fall apart again. If you genuinely care for him you'll either accept him or rip the bandaid off and stop confusing him."

"Chan-Hyung... I always fuck up. If I had just answered my phone today or didn't leave him in that dorm, Kim-joon wouldn't have made a move. I just always screw up. When I want to kerp him by my side something bad always happens."

"He never once hated you Changbin."

"I know..."

Changbin carefully stood up keeping Jisung in his arms tightly. Jisung groaning shoving his head closer into Changbins chest. Holdibg tightly to the olders sweater.

"I"ll take Jisung back to the dorms."

"Okay. Just make sure you choose wisely. If you break his heart again... I won't forgive you."

☆ミ　☆彡

Changbin managed to get Jisung back to the dorms safely and slipped him into the safety of his own bed throwing the comforter over him. He didn't want to set Jisung in his own room yet not knowing if the younger would wake up in a panic. If Jisung woke up startled he wanted to be able to be by his side as soon as possible. Jisungs body instantly curled into the sheets into the fetal postition. Smiling weakly at the sleeping male, he brushed the midnight blue hair before heading for the main area of the dorm.

His weak smile faltered seeing how trashed the dorm room was. It was a mess. The coffee table was flipped, a lamp from the end table fell side ways. A few things of glass shards by the bathroom as he walked there. There was dried dark blood on the floor and sink. It made Changbin feel sick seeing the scene in front of him. Breathing in before trying to clean the washroom, fixing up the living room seeing a utility knife slid not overly far from the coffee tablr. Changbins assumption was Jisung was going to try and use it for self defense. It was already 6AM now, class started in 3 hours, but himself nore Jisung were ready for classes in any form.

Pulling his shirt off from the sweat build up while he sat down on the couch tired and sore letting his eyes shut for a few moments. His muscles ached because he didn't strech them well since he had been nonstop since the gym. He could feel them pulsing, a dull like pain in his arms and back.

Sighing before perking up hearing Jisung shuffle and then whimpers becoming increasingly loud quickly running to his aid.

Jisung tossing and thrashing around in the bed letting out whimpers and mumbling tearful words. Changbin quickly grasping the younger.

"Sung Sung... Its okay... Hush hush hush... I'm hear love... I'm right here love. You're safe Sung." Jisung gripped rightly to Changbin. Feeling the youngers nails dig into his bicep, biting his lip.

"Sung wake up love. I'm right here." Jisung coming to his senses seeing Changbin holding him.

"Please! Stop! stop! Let go!" Jisung squirmed in his dream, Changbin shaking him gently trying to wake him.

"Shhhh.... I'm here Jisung. Just breathe." The younger slowly but surely relaxing in the olders arms catching his breath, and opening his eyes seeing Changbin with him.

"Bin... You're here." Jisung mumbled.

"You had a nightmare Sung. You're okay." Changbin carefully explained seeing the younger taking in his surroundings.

"When did? Minho?"

"Maybe 45 minutes ago. Chan texted that Minho and him are home. He was released. Everything is okay."

Jisungs when he calmed down and sorted his emotions out, his face heated up realising Changbin was shirtless revealing his healthy toned build. Changbins eyes laced with worry. His mind fogging up with thoughts. He couldn't think clearly after his nightmare. He dreamed Kim-Joon was back in this room, Jisung was tied up, bruised and limp. He hated this. He hated feeling like this. He knew nightmares would become frequent and wouldn't dare try sleeping alone right now.

"Can you stay with me Hyung?" Jisung mumbled out letting his eyes fall downwards. He felt cowardly asking him to stay, but he just didn't feel safe anymore.

"Okay. I should chan-"

"No... Please don't change. I- I just want to be close." Jisung shyly spoke. Changbin hummed. He was overly warm anyways, so not changing was a blessing.

He laid down in the bed, Jisung shuffling closer letting his head rest against Changbins chest trying to get comfortable. Changbin slung his arm around Jisungs waist pulling him closer.

Lulling the younger to sleep.

Changbin too slowly fell asleep with the younger at his side. His hand slowly falling to each for Jisungs letting it rest on his rising chest.