confessions -gawsten

Fuck.

Geoff loved music.

Awsten knew Geoff loves music.

He listened to Geoff's records on his record player. His parents haven't even thought about leaving the hospital and Geoff was still there. He didn't know if this counted as a break in, but he'd been in there for a few days now. His parents texted and called and hadn't even tried to look here. Awsten stopped looking at his phone. He didn't wanna go home. Awsten wanted to stay here with Geoff's smell, his vibe. He got up, he needed to. Awsten laid in Geoff's bed all the time over the covers thinking. He slept maybe a little, even with the loud music. Awsten wanted to know more about Geoff. Yes, he probably already knew everything. But he wanted to see what else was in there, Geoff must've had something personal.

Awsten got up and went to his closet. He felt guilty. Geoff wasn't dead and he was snooping in Geoff's room without anyone having a clue he was there. But Awsten wanted to see what was in there. If Geoff died, he wanted to know more about him. Maybe something personal- okay not this personal. Awsten pulled out a fleshlight that was obviously very very used and it had an odor.

"Oh my.." Awsten threw it to the side, he was gonna clean it later. If Geoff was alive, at-least he could come home to a fresh... thing. He continued digging through the very odd things like handcuffs? Ropes? Other weird items Awsten would rather not talk about.

Finally, Awsten found a box. A big brown box. He smiled and opened it. It was a lot of things. It had to do with a lot of Awsten's things. First thing he took out was a bear, from build-a-bear.

"C'mon Geoff! Please!" Awsten begged, his hands clasped together in the praying motion.

"Fine." Geoff gave in after the sixth attempt to drag Geoff into the yellow store.

They were looking at the bear's bodies, they were so freaky. They looked like corpses.

"Oh my goodness! Geoffrey!" Awsten cheered, smiling as he ran over to Geoff, "I found the perfect ones for us!" He held up two bears, one was a pink it was definitely an imitation of something from the Care Bears and one was black with red spotting around it.

"You take this one to remind you of me, I take this one to remind myself of you." Awsten handed him the pink one, while he held the black and red.

"Let's do the voice things! I put my voice in yours and your voice in mine." Awsten smiled, grabbing one of the buttons, Geoff following after. He inserted the key and pressed the button then spoke,

"You wanna kiss me so bad! Mwah-"

"Shut up Aws! I don't!" Geoff laughed. Awsten pressed the button again and again and again and again. Waiting for at one point that Geoff's voice would just appear next to him. He missed Geoff. Awsten couldn't force himself to put it down. He wrapped his arms around it and cried, laying on the ground. Awsten pressed it again and again, pushing his face into the bear. Awsten laid with it the rest of his night.

—-

The next morning, he kept the bear on him. Awsten acted like a fucking child holding that thing to his chest, occasionally squeezing its hand. He wanted to continue looking, he wanted to explore. Awsten got up again sitting in-front of the box, finding a bunch of vinyls at the bottom.

No.

Fucking.

Way. He sworn Geoff had thrown these out! He begged Geoff too, he did not like the violence or the words. The words were so mean. He hated this music so bad, it wa the only music he refused to even be near when with Geoff.

"Awsten you won't believe what I found!" Geoff smiled as soon as they walked into his room. It was so bright.

"What is it?" Awsten smiled sitting on his bed, he was wearing a short white dress, his socks went a little above his shins.

"Just listen!" Geoff smiled, "just listen." He set the needle in somewhere specific on the black circular circle. This would be Awsten's first time listening to something like this, it sounded almost bubbly at first. The man's voice sounded happy, until it changed? Awsten was really relaxing with it at first before all hell broke lose. He couldn't hear what they were saying, it may have been the scratching, maybe a thump messed something up, but something he heard was,

"YOU AIN'T SHIT YOU ASS MOTHER FUCKING SLUT YOU FUCKIN' WHORE! I FUCKIN HATE YOU!" Awsten's face mouth was formed in a circle his eyebrows furrowed. No way. This was disgusting. The next first continued on talking about chests and liquid drugs, then finally the screaming started again and that's when Awsten lost it.

"SUCK MY FUCKIN' DICK, FU-" Awsten lifted the needle gentle, crossing his arms and looking at Geoff.

"Neat?" Geoff smiled, but Awsten just stared.

"Are you kidding Geoff? Neat? That's disgusting! You can't use those words especially with a woman around! No girl will ever like you if you spoke like that y'know." Awsten yelled back. Obviously, this took place when he didn't know himself too well.

"You mean YOU will never like me if I spoke like that? Some chicks are into it!" Geoff yelled back.

"Oh shut up Geoff! It's nasty talk!" Awsten groaned, "I hate it."

"But it's rare."

"But I hate it and I'm not coming back unless it's gone."Awsten pouted.

"What?! That's not fair, it's just music." Geoff was mad now, he couldn't believe this.

"It's stupid!" Awsten began to walk out of the room, but Geoff stopped him.

"Fine, I'll do it later." Geoff groaned

He never did it. What a loser.

—

if u know the band 😳😏