Chapter 18

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Chapter 18

Without a father,
My heart will not be completed.
Nor will my mom be fully
happy.

I hated hearing mommy cry in her room,
She cried every single night,
Thinking I was asleep.
But I wasn't.
I would hear her sobbing non stop,
I wanted to hug her.
To lay with her until she stopped crying.
Until she stopped feeling sad.
I wonder why she cried.
I wish she stopped crying.

I've always wanted a dad.
I hated seeing kids walking with their dads
I was jealous.
I was jealous that they had a dad and
Not me.
I wish I had a dad.
I wanted to be like the other kids
Who had a mom and dad.
My life would be much happier if I had a dad.
My mom wouldn't have been this sad
If I ever had a dad.
I wonder why I didn't have a dad like the other kids had.
I would ask my mom
"Why do other kids have dads but I don't?"
She would always respond with
"Because we are special."
I knew that wasn't true.

Did my dad not want me?
I cried sometimes.
Whenever I saw kids with their dads,
I would run away and cry.
But sometimes,
I would stare and pretend it was me and my dad.

Sometimes I would write a letter to Santa.
"I want a dad for Christmas."
But my present would never arrive,
That day.
Was the day I never believed in Santa.
I was happy for my other presents but I really wanted a dad.
More than anything.

I wanted a dad who can teach me how to ride a bicycle.
Someone who I can play with.
Someone who I can laugh with.
My mom was there but I still felt lonely without a dad.
Am I really not worthy to have a dad?



Where are you dad?

— Hope Gonzalez

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