"911, what's your emergency?"
"My sister is evil!"
"The fu- I mean, are you okay?"
"No"
***
A harmless little phone call made to 911 leads to life-changing (not really), majestic (bruh no), and glorious (enough with the cliches) happenings in Lily S...
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Him|Her|His boss
Hola
Dude! We're not friends!
Dudezoned and unfriended in the same day? I'll go cry myself to sleep now.
Thank God.
...
You're mean
Aww thanks!
*sniffles* so you don't want to be my friend?
Nope.
...
...
What about boyfriend?
Stay within your limits.
But- I wanted you to be the Peggy to my Steve.
Okay wait. Let me get this straight.
You know who Steve is but don't know who Bucky is?
...
I do now.
Really? Who is he?
Well...during our "name reveal" talk, you thought I was Bucky because of my name. And Bucky is the Winter Soldier from what I saw during yesterday's movie night. He's played by Sebastian Stan who you want to be your boyfriend. But you thought Bucky was me, so you want me to be your boyfriend. Wink wink.
...
Did you just say "wink wink"?
Maaaaayyyyybbbbbeeeee
Just piss off dude. Like, go get a life.
No. Doing the impossible is Tom Cruise's job, not mine.
Okay...
Anyways bye!
Wait what? Why?
I gotta go work.
And that's supposed to be better than talking to yours truly?
Far better
Please don't go
No
Pleeeaaassseee
Dude, don't you have friends?
...
Yes...you
Hell no.
Okay can we just talk?
About what?
Anything you want
What if I say I want to talk about boys?
Sure
How bored are you?
Very
Okay then let's talk about boys I'm interested in
Yes yes. Number 1: Me
Eww no, this just went from somehow amusing to disgusting.
I'm gonna ignore that statement.
Okay this is going nowhere. Reminds me of when I'm talking to one of my friends and we run out of topics so we just type small boring sentences until the conversation dies.
...
So I'm your friend?
You're pathetic
...
How did you know?
It was an easy guess
Well, I-
Mr. Barnes, can we talk?
...
Shit
Dude are you at work?!
Um...of course Sir.
I'll be right there.
You are at work and instead of working you're talking to me?
Dude one of these days you're getting fired.
Something tells me that day is today. Gotta go. Pray for my job babe!
