Take Your Time

Chapter 3

Caitlin's POV

***flashback***

My eyes flicker open, and I look around. The surroundings look familiar but I'm aware I'm not where I should be.

I look to my left and see Peyton snuggled into me as she was before I fell asleep. I scan the room quickly and see everyone's still asleep. If I can get out without waking everyone up, that would be great.

I start to scoot towards the edge of the bed. Peyton's hand clenched on my shirt as I started to slide away. I pull the pillow from behind my head and use it to replace my body. I watch as she nuzzles her head to it. She is so adorable.

I hopped off the bed quietly and made a mad dash to the door. I get out and run to my cabin. Like the one I was in, this one looks like everyone is sleeping. I open the door and take a quiet step in. When the door shuts and no one seems to be awake, I walk to my bed. I take a seat and lay back sighing in relief.

I go to close my eyes as I try to sleep the rest of the time before we are all awake.

"Where the hell were you last night?" A booming voice asks, causing me to jump. I look outside my bunk and Kara is kneeling staring at me. "Where were you?"

Who does she think she is my mom? "I was with a friend."

"Girlfriend?"

"I said friend." I sat up in my bed knowing sleeping again wasn't going to be an option. "But what if I did say girlfriend? Would you tease me and start icing me out?"

It's not like me and this girl hangout but I felt a pinch of confidence and I feel like calling her out.

"Why would I tease you if you were with your girlfriend?" She asks with an innocent tone.

"Because you all assume I'm gay because I have gay parents." I practically shout. "Don't act like you wouldn't start making comments like the comments from the table on how my moms probably forced the lifestyle on me and I must be making them proud."

I get out of the bed to go outside and sit. I need fresh air. I feel so angry and worked up and I hate it.

"Can I sit?" Kara asks but does anyway. "I wasn't going to say anything like that. People joke around all the time. I understand jokes can be taken too far but we are teenagers, and it happens."

I take a deep breath. "You don't understand though. I get it's a joke, trust me I do but it's just..."

"You are confused so it's harder to see that we aren't being serious." Kara speaks for me. "Am I close?"

I look down at the ground. Should I confide in this girl? I barely know her. Hell, I barely know the girl who is confusing me. "I think you are right. I don't know what to do and I don't know how to feel. This isn't my element. I don't want to act on what I might be feeling, and it would be wrong."

"What if you aren't wrong? What if this is the only time you will see the girl who is causing your brain to go crazy?" Kara shoots back. "Do you want to risk going back to your hometown without missing an opportunity?"

I shrug my shoulders. "I don't but then I do. It's not like I'm going to see Peyton again so why does any of this really matter? If I try to sort out how I feel and let's say she feels the same way, I'll leave camp heart broken and sad. If I keep this to myself and block out the feelings, I will leave here completely fine."

"You know that is a lie. Why are you so scared to feel?"

"I'm not!" I quickly defend. "Protecting my heart from sadness isn't me being afraid to feel. It would be different if I knew Peyton after this."