Descend - Wolfstar + Marauders

Stay With Me

When Remus came back, he was different. There was no doubt about it.

Sirius knew it was hard for him to see his father sick, but he hadn’t anticipated it would hit him quite so hard. He’d never seen his partner so agitated. It usually took quite a lot to get Remus riled up. The rest of them, not so much. Sirius in particular got heated over the smallest things, a fact that he was well aware of and that had only grown worse over the past months.

Remus had always been a calming force in all of his friends lives. He was sensible. Not necessarily sensible in the way people outside of his friends often assumed. He wasn’t stuffy or above breaking rules, and in actuality was often the first one to suggest it, but he always had a reason. He broke rules because he wanted something from it, or because he found them oppressive or unfair, or out of loyalty to his friends. Remus did not do rebellion for rebellions sake. He did not do unnecessary conflict. In fact, he was a master at diffusing conflict in others. The kind of person you wanted around in a crisis.

That Remus, the one person who was always capable of keeping Sirius grounded, was not the person who came home after those three weeks away. The person who came home was tense. He was twitchy, wound tight. Snapping at Sirius over unwashed dishes in one breath and begging him to stay home from work in the next. Sirius could see that he was in pain and did the very best he could to be patient. He knew he could be a temperamental person to live with, especially lately, so it only seemed fair that he return the kindness that was so often shown to him.

Sirius had tried just asking him to talk about it, but Remus seemed pretty adamant that he didn’t want to do that. Not that he ever outright refused to talk. He would just strategically find ways to maneuver out of the conversation. One way in particular.

Sirius wasn’t going to whine about having an active sex life. If that’s how Remus wanted to work through his issues, then who was he to complain. Sometimes he felt it, the desperation that lingered on the edge of every touch. Sometimes he was afraid of what he would hear if he said no, if he pushed Remus into actually talking. He didn’t start to grow truly concerned, though, until he got home after a particularly long workday only to find a light haze and the smell of smoke wafting out from under the front door.

He had his wand out in an instant.

Sirius’ training kicked in. He blasted the front door open. He stepped into the flat. Pressed his back against the wall. He was ready.

“Show yourself!” he called into the smoke.

All he could hear was the blood rushing through his ears.

Sirius was a split second away from firing off a curse as his eyes landed on a very alarmed looking Remus standing in the kitchen, hands raised in a defensive stance.

“Fuck Moony!” he yelled as he dropped his wand arm down. “I almost stunned you!”

Remus was breathing fast and heavy. Sirius noticed a slight shake in his hands, mirroring the tremor in his own.

He looked around, taking stock of the scene before him. There was a blackened pot sitting in the sink. The smoke alarm had been knocked off the roof, left dangling by a couple of wires. There was a smashed glass on the floor in a puddle of amber liquid.

“Been cooking, have you?” asked Sirius with a raised eyebrow. An edge of panic lingered in his voice.

Remus slowly lowered his hands, breathing still shallow. He nodded.

“Thought I’d give it a go,” he said slowly.

“Looks like it went well.”

“It’s ready if you want a plate,” Remus responded, gesturing to the burnt mess in the sink.