The Bench Warmer (Book 1)

Chapter 25: Hope They Don't Find Out

I was quite a bit lost in my head over the last few days if I was not going to lie to my self, all at the exact same time as well, none the less, as I was not all too sure as to just what it was that I had in fact been thinking as of late if I was not going to lie to my self either. I felt like I needed to talk to some one before it was that I was about to do what it was that I was about to do after school, all at the exact same time as well, never the less.
Though I knew that it was a terrible idea, as I knew that I had already made a promise with the dude that I was going to keep it a secret between me and him, all at the exact same time as well, none the less. I knew that this was in fact the only way that things like this would work out for me. I knew that if I was to go and talk to some one about all of this, all at the exact same time as well, than it would mean they would start to restrict me, and they might think of me differently.
That was already some thing that I had been feeling as of late as it was so far, all at the exact same time as well, as I really did not want to be known as the schools local drug addict, all at the exact same time too. I was already failing all of my classes this semester, and I felt like this was the only way, as he had told me that the drugs that he was going to give me were to help me with my thoughts, and help me numb out all of the pain and make me stronger and faster.
At first, I had not been taking the guy seriously what so ever, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like that was always what it was that they had told me back in school, as to the fact that they had told me it was a lie about drugs. I kind of humored the guy, and I promised to meet up with him the next day, all at the exact same time too, as I kind of felt quite a bit bad for the guy if I was not going to lie to my self, as I felt like maybe I should try to help the guy my self.
I had tried to ask him about all of the drugs, and of course, he had told me all of the symptoms that they had all treated, which I once again had told believed in at all, all at the exact same time as well, once again. That was of course until he had told me to Google all of it, which I had once again thought it as a joke, until it was that I had in fact actually Googled it, and I had found out that all of the stuff that he had told me about, was in fact all real, and it was in fact all true, all at the exact same time as well, once again.
I was actually quite a bit surprised by all that he had told me, as he had also told me that they were legal of course too, if they were in fact medically given to you, which he had told me was quite a bit hard all at the exact same time as well, as he had told me that I needed to be prescribed to them, all at the exact same time too. He had told me that he could get them a lot easier to me, and also for a lot cheaper, so I felt like I had no other choice but to believe the guy, as shady as it all sounded.
Now here I was, at the back of the school right now, and I was in fact waiting to be given the drugs that the guy was bringing to me, all at the exact same time as well, as I could not help but to be looking around, in ever which way and direction over and over again, just to make sure that we were not caught by some other kids, or some teachers at the back of the school, all at the exact same time as well, though I knew that it was not going to be the case what so ever at all, all at the exact same time as well.
I breathed in quite a bit heavily to my self all at once, as I did my best to try to calm my self down in the mean time, as I knew that every thing was going to be okay for me, and that nothing bad was going to happen in this encounter, all at the exact same time as well, as I knew that we were not going to be caught, as I knew that no one ever went to this side of the school, as a lot of the kids had made jokes about the fact that was where all of the drug deals all happened, all at the exact same time as well, once again.
How ever, it really was not actually all that much of a joke, as it was now a reality to me, as I never thought that I would have ever been put in to a situation such as the one that I was in right at this very moment in time as well, as I felt like I would have never thought that I would have had to sink this low, and I would have never gotten to the point that I was at right now, as I knew that for a fact, that if my parents knew about just what it was that was going on right now, they for sure would not be proud of me.
I did not care at all how ever, as I felt like they were not proud of me at all what so ever any more, as I was no longer a football player, and I was no longer a grade A student any more, such as it was that I had been before now, all at the exact same time as well, as it really did in fact hurt me quite a bit, all at the exact same time as well, to know that I was no longer the same kid that I had once been long before now, all at the exact same time as well, once again.
I felt like I just did not care all too much at all what so ever right at this very moment in time too, as I quickly began to start to breath in quite a bit of a soft sigh to my self all at once, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, all at the exact same time as well, none the less, as I then all of the sudden got my mind, and I got my focus on the fact that I began to start to freak out as to the fact that I saw some one coming over to just where it was that I was even standing at right at this very moment in time any ways.
I did my best to try to calm my self down how ever, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to realize that the person that was in fact coming over to just where it was that I was even at right at this very moment in time any ways, just so happened to me by drug dealer of course, which was, Thomas, as I let out quite a bit of a soft sigh of relief to my self all at once, as soon as I realized that it was in fact just him that was coming over to me right now.
I had been a bit scared that he had in fact bailed on me, all at the exact same time too, but it was clear that was not the case what so ever, luckily enough for me, as I felt the tension that was in the air a bit before now go away, all at the exact same time as well, as I just shook my head quite a bit to my self all at once, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden saw him nod to me, as soon as it was that he did in fact begin to start to get closer over to me.
I blinked my eyes a few times all at once, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, all at the exact same time as well, once again, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to breath in quite a bit heavily to my self all at once, as I then all of the sudden began to start to nod back to Thomas, to let him know at the very least, that I was in fact paying attention to him, all at the exact same time too.
I could tell that thankfully at the very least, that it had in fact made him feel quite a bit better, and quite a bit more comfortable, all at the exact same time as well, as I let out another quick and soft sigh of some relief to my self, as he then all of the sudden stopped my self all at the exact same time too, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, all at the exact same time as well, never the less.
As I breathed in quite a bit to my self all at once, once again, I then all of the sudden began to start to hear him begin to start to speak to me, as soon as it was that we were now staring at one another right in to each others eyes, as I then all of the sudden began to start to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to me in the very first place any ways, as soon as it was that he began to start to continue to speak to me, once again.
"Alright... So most drug deals will lie to you, and not tell you this, but I'm just going to let you know that these are drugs, and they will kill you if you take too many... You need to start with a lower dosage, and you will be okay with that from there..." He said to me, as he looked at me right in to my eyes as soon as it was that he had in fact said it to me, all at the exact same time as well, as it was clear that he was trying to make sure that I was in fact taking all of this seriously, all at the exact same time as well.
I really did not have any plans of doing as such thing like that if I was not going to lie to my self, as I knew that these were in fact legal drugs that he was handing me, but at the exact same time too, I also knew that these were hard drugs as well, as I let out quite a bit of a heavy sigh to my self, all at the exact same time too, as I did my best to try to calm my self down once again, as I knew that Thomas did not think of me as some kind of idiot what so ever, all at the exact same time as well.
I knew that he was just trying to help me, and he was just trying to warn me, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, all at the exact same time as well, once again, as I breathed in quite a bit heavily to my self, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like, as smart of a guy that I was, I also knew that I was quite a bit desperate, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like if I was to feel immediate results as to just what it was that was going on.
If that was in fact the case, than I felt like I very well might take a bunch of extra ones, if it did in fact make me feel a lot better, all at the exact same time as well. I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could, all at the exact same time too, as I just shook my head quite a bit to my self, all at once, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now.
I breathed in a bit of another soft sigh to my self once again, as I did my best to try to get my mind, and to get my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, as I then all of the sudden began to start to lift my head up to Thomas once again, as I did my best to try to calm my self down in the mean time, all at the exact same time as well, as I saw that Thomas was staring at me right in to my eyes, with his eyes squinted at me all at the exact same time too, as it was clear that he was trying to make sure that I was in fact taking this all seriously.
I was in fact taking this quite a bit seriously all at the exact same time as well, though I just knew that I was simply just quite a bit lost in my head right at this very moment in time any ways, as that was simply just due to the fact that I was thinking of all of the side affects that this drug might have on me, all at the exact same time as well, never the less, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact had my mind on long before now, all at the exact same time too, once again, as I just began to start to calm my self down all of the sudden.
I stared at Thomas right in to his eyes for just a little while longer, until I then all of the sudden did in fact go right on ahead and nod back to him as a bit of a response all of the sudden, to let him know that I had in fact heard as to just what it was that he had said, and I was in fact taking all of this quite a bit seriously, all at the exact same time as well, none the less. I also did it for as well, to the fact that I wanted to let him know that I was about to speak to him, all at the exact same time too.
Thomas blinked his eyes at me a few times this time, as it seemed like he was now the one that seemed to be quite a bit lost in his own head right at this very moment in time any ways, all at the exact same time as well. How ever, in the end, Thomas did in fact seem to get his focus back on to the present, as he then all of the sudden began to start to go right on ahead and nod back to me, all at the exact same time as well, to let me know that he was in fact paying attention as to just what it was that I was in fact about to go on ahead and say to him.
I let out another soft sigh to my self once again, as I did in fact feel quite a bit better if I was not going to lie to my self either, now that it was that I did in fact know that it was in fact the case once again. I did my best to try to keep my self as calm as I felt like I possibly could, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden did in fact begin to start to speak back to Thomas, all at the exact same time as well, now that it was that I did in fact realize that he was in fact beginning to start to listen as to just what it was that I was even about to say to him in the very first place any ways, once again.
"Thanks man... Can't tell you how much I appreciate this..." I said to him at first, as I did in fact want to let him know that I was in fact quite a bit grateful for just what it was that he was even doing for me right at this very moment in time any ways, once again. As I stared at him for just a bit more time, I then let out another bit of a soft sigh of relief to my self, as I saw that Thomas did in fact crack quite a bit of a happy smile on his face, all at the exact same time as well, as it was clear that he was in fact glad to help. I would not say that we were friends just yet, but he sure as hell was helping me out quite a bit, all at the exact same time too. I did my best to try to calm my self down in the mean time, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now once again, as I got my mind, and I got my focus instead on the fact that I still had a few more questions before it was that I did in fact buy the drugs from him, all at the exact same time as well. I nodded back to him once again, to let him know that I was not done just yet. He did in fact nod back to me, to let me know that he was still paying attention to me, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to go right on ahead and begin to start to speak to him once again, now that it was that I still knew that he was listening to me. "What are the drugs that you are giving me?"
I did my best to try to keep quite a bit of a serious look on my face, all at the exact same time as well, as I kind of felt like I could not help but to be a little bit skeptical of all this, once again. I knew that drugs were still not good for you, and I felt like if there was some thing bad about these drugs, than I wanted to look it up first, as to see what it was that was even in the drugs the very first place any ways, never the less.
Thomas seemed to be keeping quiet calm look on his face all these exact same time as well, as it was clear that he was not lying to me what so ever it just what it was that was going on right now, unless it was that he was some sort of master scammer, which did not make any sort of sense to me as to just why it was that he would be, and just why it was that he would lie to me in the very first place any ways, once again, none the less.
I knew that there were some dark people in the world that did some dark things, so that was why I kind of felt like I could not help but to be a little bit hesitant as to just what it who was that he was about to give me the very first place any ways, all at the exact same time as well, once again. Luckily enough once again, as well, he did not seem to be all too bothered by it what so ever, all at the exact same time too, as I let out quite a bit of a soft sigh of relief to my self, as soon as it was that I had even asked him, and the fact that he had a calm and nonchalant looking on his face.
I felt quite a bit better, as I did in fact kind of feel like at this point, that things were going to be fine for me, and that nothing bad was going to come out of just what it was that was even going on right at this very moment in time too, as I blinked my eyes a few times, and I then all of the sudden began to start to nod to my self, all at the exact same time too, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts that I had in fact been thinking on long before now, all at the exact same time as well, once again, never the less.
As I stared at him for just a little bit longer, as Thomas kept the same calm and cool look on his face that he had long before now, all at the same time as well, once again, Thomas not all too much longer after that was in fact said and done, then all of the sudden nodded to me, all at the exact same time too, to let me know that he was in fact about to go right on ahead and begin to start speak to me, all the exact same time as well.
I felt quite a bit better as well, now that it was that I had in fact seen him do as such a thing like that, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden began to start to get my mind, and get my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to go right on ahead and nod back to Thomas, to let him know that I was in fact paying attention to him right at this very moment in time any ways.
Thomas once again seemed to feel quite a bit better once it was that I had in fact done as such a thing like that, as in the end, he did in fact go right on ahead and begin to start to speak to me, all at the exact same time too, as soon as it was that he had in fact seen me do as such a thing, all at the exact same time as well, never the less, once again, as I then all of the sudden began or start to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to me all at the exact same time as well, at that.
"I've got gabapentin to help with the injury to your legs, that way you do not feel any pain... The Adderall is to help you keep your mind and your focus on your thoughts..." He said to me, as he stared at me right in to my eyes, all at the exact same time as well, to make sure that he did in fact have my full attention on to just what it was that he had even said to me in the very first place any ways. I had in fact heard as to just what it was that he had said if I was not going to lie to my self, as I knew that I had never taken any of those meds at all before, but for some reason they seemed to be awfully familiar to me, all at the exact same time as well, once again. Perhaps that was just due to the fact that I knew that they were in fact drugs that people used. I just let out quite a bit of a soft sigh to my self all at the exact same time too, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, as I then all of the sudden began to start to nod back to Thomas, to let him know I had not only heard what he said, but I was for sure okay with all of that as well, as I knew that it was exactly what it was that I needed. Thomas seemed to have a bit of a worried look on his face right at this very moment in time any ways, but in the end, he did in fact go right on ahead and begin to start to begin to continue to speak to me, to once again make sure that I had heard him, all at once, as I tilted my head over towards him a little bit, all at the exact same time as well, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, as I did in fact once again begin to start to continue to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to me in the very first place any ways, once again. "If you have any sort of side effects, just let me know, and I will give you some thing else, okay?"