Babe For The Weekend

Chapter 8 - lost in translation

"Joss? Honey? Are you awake?"
The incessant knock had woken him. He propped up on the bed scratching his eyes.
"Mom?"
"You have a visitor downstairs."
"Who is it?"
"I think you should go down and see for yourself."
"I'll be down in a bit." He answered back towards the door.

The past seven days have been a blur for Joss. He runs in the morning, eat then sleep all day, wake up to have dinner and then sleep again only to repeat it the next day. The funny thing is he can't even remember what he ate the day before. Sometimes he reads, or at least tries to. But the focus escapes him before he could digest the words. There were a few nights when he would wake up from his sleep without any apparent reason. And when he does his hand itches to reach out and open his phone. Bugged with a massive curiosity to check if there were messages from Luke. It takes everything in him to control himself. He made sure to lock the drawer in his old study table to help him restrain the urge. When he catches himself on a free time, he would watch football or a basketball game to keep himself occupied.

He often asked if given the chance to go back to how it was before, how they were before, would he take it? Before the injury, before the weekends of pretending, would he want it back? Joss couldn't find the answer to say a simple yes. It was always riddled with justifications looped in hazy excuses on why he would or wouldn't take it all back. Never a simple yes.

Joss knew he would see him again. They work for the same entertainment company and it would be foolish to think that he'd be free of him once he gets back. He knew if he goes back like this he might not be able to control himself around him. Better to do the work of moving on now while he still has the time.

But fate has an interesting sense of humor.

Joss took a cold shower to wake his body up. It didn't help. He took his time preparing that he had forgotten why he was asked to go down the first place. He wanted to stay in bed. Sighing, he dragged himself downstairs.

"Here he is now, I'm sorry to keep you waiting."
Joss hears his mother as he comes in the living room.
"Mom? Do we have oatmil-" He froze.

Luke was sitting in their couch. He stood up as soon as he saw Joss, wiping his cold hands in his jeans.

"H-hi.." Luke raised his hand in a wave but immediately stopped himself, putting it down. He smiles nervously at Joss, swallowing the lump in his throat which he could have sworn was his own beating heart.
"Alright, Joss, Luke, I'll leave you be. I'll be in the garden. Just call me is you need me."
Luke nodded politely and watched her leave. Before she left, she gave Joss a knowing look, one that he did not understand.

They stood apart in the room with a coffee table in between. But Luke could have mistaken it as a wall. The silence was deafening with only the hands of an old clock to disturb it.

"Hi.." Luke scratched the back of his head. "I said that already."
"Hi.." Joss uttered, looking anywhere but Luke.
"You look.. good." Luke smiled sheepishly.
Joss faced him. He couldn't say the same. Luke looked exhausted. His clothes were disheveled and there were noticeable dark circles around his eyes.
"I.. uhh.. I was working for a commercial when I got back from the resort." Luke added.
"G-good." Joss replied after clearing his throat.
"Did you get my texts? You didn't replied to any of them." Luke's eyes widen in panic as he'd just realized what he just said. "Sorry, that sounds wrong- I mean- Uhh- It's okay if you don't want to reply- No- I'm not saying you didn't want to- It's just- Well.." 
If they were in a different circumstances right now, Joss would have laughed. He'd never seen Luke like this. He was always so calm and collected when he's not being funny. 
"I don't use my phone these days." He responded briefly.
"Oh.." Was all Luke could say. He bit his lip, unable to think of anything to keep their conversation going.
"Have you had breakfast yet?" Joss asked as he stared at the floor.
"Uhhm.. No, not yet." Luke shook his head, his eyes glimmer.
Joss finally looks up at him.
"Would you want to eat with me?"
Luke was rendered mindless by the unexpected question. He couldn't find the right words to say or what to say to that at all.
"If.. if that's okay. I would really want to. Yes." He blurted out in one go, perhaps evidently too eager.
Joss heads to the dining room and Luke followed behind calculating the distance in his steps.
"I hope you like chicken noodle soup." Joss fixed him a bowl.
Luke nodded as he watched Joss closely.
"I went to the building quarters," Luke had said between eating. "I thought you were there."
"Ahh.." Joss answered, waiting for him to continue.
"I asked around and when no one knew where you were I figured you'd have gone home."
Joss wanted to ask him why he was looking for him when he clearly made his point that he wanted nothing to do with him.

They ate in silence after Luke got the hint that Joss didn't want to talk to him. He hadn't had sleep for the past four days when he was looking for him. He had wracked his brain thinking where Joss went. He hadn't seen him for so many days and there was so much he wanted to tell him.

"Thanks for the meal. I s-should go." Luke headed for the door.
"That's it?" Joss asked instinctively.
"You went all the way here after looking for me to tell me you were looking for me?"
Luke could feel his heart climbing in his throat again, screaming to get out.
"I just wanted to make sure you're okay. T-that's why I went here."
"If you say so." Joss turns his back to climb up the stairs when he felt a hand grab his wrist. Luke eyes were stained in red. He was about to shake his hold when Luke spoke.
"Joss.. That night, when I said I wished you never told me.. I only said that because I was the one who was supposed to tell you first."
Joss looked at him dumbfounded.
"I know I might have given you the wrong impression, I shouldn't have left it at that. I'm stupid, I know that now but I was supposed to tell you first, Joss."  Luke was trying to catch his breath.
"I don't understand. Are you saying w-what I think you're saying?"
Luke slipped his hand in between his.
"I'm sorry it took so long.. If you read my text you'd have known it already." Luke chuckled nervously and he could hear his own voice shaking.
Joss was lost for words.
"I'm really really really scared right now so please.. please say something.. anything.." 

Luke pressed their clasped hands and while waiting for Joss to answer he could feel the seconds extend to infinity..