𝚍𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚢 ❀ 𝚍𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜, d.m.

₀₇. 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎

(draco's pov)

i tried to convince myself that i hated her. but i knew i didn't. she was annoying but in a sexy type of way. she flustered me so bad and she didn't even know it. i've got to be honest and say that i was slowly falling for her. i hated to admit it, though. but i would be lying if i said she didn't make me want to just grab her face and press my lips onto hers.

after my classes, i had detention with slughorn since i had messed with some hufflepuff's sleeping draught potion. i began walking over to the classroom but my dad suddenly appeared in front of me, nearly giving me a heart attack.

"what are you doing here in the middle of the day?" i whispered angrily, "if someone catches you, i'll be expelled."

"i'll be brief," my father paused, coolly scanning the area for any students or teachers, "go to the library today. in the restricted section, you'll find a book on curses and counter-curses. you must start studying it in case anyone catches on to our association with the dark lord..."

"but father– i– i–"

"silence," he snapped then whispered, "you are going to know those curses like the back of your hand. i want not another word out of you."

then he disappeared and i was left there in the hallway, alone.

i didn't want anything to do with voldemort. i just wanted to live my life. but my stupid father wouldn't leave me alone. on the first day back at hogwarts, he had met with me and informed me that i should "be prepared to get the dark mark." i tried arguing with him about it and i wish i had the guts to tell him how absurd he was for following lord voldemort, but i didn't. he was just as stubborn as my mother.

i took a deep breath and walked over to the classroom. surprisingly, i saw ivy and her friend leo already sitting down. i hadn't expected anyone else to get detention and i was even more shocked to see ivy there. i nervously ran my hand through my hair and sat behind her and leo.

slughorn had given us potions to write and as always, i dreaded doing the work. but halfway into my work, i managed to find my wand and with a help of magic, i charmed my quill to write for me. ivy and i had some intimate sort of moments during the detention but i didn't pay much mind to it. i figured out she was going to see aiden at the library. so i assumed she was way more into him than she was into me.

after detention, i headed to the library to go searching for the stupid book. i walked over to the restricted section. it took some time but i finally found the book and started to head toward to door until...

"draco–" i heard aiden say from behind me.

i turned around to see him sitting in one of the chairs.

"what book did you find?" he nosily asked.

i couldn't snap at him. if he was talking to ivy, i couldn't risk him telling her that i had harassed him.

"it's nothing, really– just some rubbish about curses and counter-curses–" i quavered.

"that doesn't really seem like nothing." he responded.

i tried finding a way out of the conversation. i knew he was there to meet ivy but i asked him anyways.

"what are you doing here at 10 at night, aiden?" i asked, "waiting for someone?"

"yes, in fact, i am," he paused, "ivy diggory. heard of her?"

"no, not really." i lied.

"she's breathtaking, really," he smirked and paused, "looks even hotter with less clothes on."

i clenched my fist, wishing i could punch his dumb face so bad.

"you've hooked up with her?" i asked him, hoping to understand exactly what was going on between the two of them.

he sighed, "i almost did. her friend almost caught us messing around."

i stared at him, holding back every part of me that wanted to just beat him up.

"oh," i paused, "well– i must leave. i need to get some sleep. i suppose i'll see you tomorrow."

"i suppose." aiden responded.

i took a deep breath and walked out of the library, to the common room. once i got to my dorm, i sat on my bed and stared at the ground. there was only one thing i felt. lonely. the word left a chill down my spine. loneliness had been haunting me my entire life.

maybe it was because i felt like no one understood me. my problems were different from everyone else's. my thoughts drifted back to my dad telling me to prepare to get the dark mark. but what if i didn't want to? why was my father dragging me into this mess?

i fell on my bed and sighed, playing with the silver snake ring on my finger. i stared at the ceiling and wondered if i should just run away. if i ran away, i wouldn't have to worry about my father, or voldemort, or anything of that sort. but if i did, eventually, my father would find me.

i knew i was an overthinker, but i couldn't help it. the next set of thoughts included ivy. she was beautiful. far too beautiful for somebody as evil as me, i thought. i felt pathetic in every way. and i came to the conclusion that i was lonely and in love.