Blessed Death boy (Nico di Angelo)

2: Mutha Fucka

2: Mutha Fucka

    Eris is walking back to her cabin to pack her things, but getting away from Nico was a bonus. She never thought she'd want that, to get away from Nico; not in a million years.
    "Why in Hades (sorry dad) would you accept, let alone request a quest like that?" He was following her back to her cabin, lecturing her about how stupid she was being.
    "Because I want to help, Nico. I want to contribute. I hate having to sit and watch while our friends get injured and attacked anytime anyone tries to leave."
    "But you can't stop it alone. And you've never been on a quest before. You don't know how dangerous it can get."
    "Your quest to get me wasn't that dangerous, you kicked that snake bitch's ass, no problem."
"Seriously? You left home for like an hour before you were robbed and attacked. You won't last out there, especially going against something as dangerous as this."
"Hey, I've been practicing asshole, I'll do fine out there." She'd reached her cabin.
"I'm just trying to-"
She slammed the cabin door in his face.
Her half siblings bombarded her with questions about the rumors of her quest and what she knew about it. She didn't answer any of them.
When she finished packing, she walked out, and surprisingly saw that Nico was nowhere to be found. He'd been harassing her nonstop about her decision to accept a quest, and it got old, fast.
Once she'd made it to the hill where Chiron and Dionysus waited to send her off, Eris would be prepared with a big boy epic sword, and as she was saying her goodbyes to all the friends she desperately wanted to make out with on a daily basis, she wondered where Nico was. It was hurtful; she knew he was ticked about the quest, but thought he'd at least show up for her send off.
And as she began walking down the hill towards Argus playing Clash of Clans in the driver's seat, she was told to wait. As she turned around to ask why, Nico came running up the hill with a backpack of his own.
"Oh, NOW you want to come say bye. Talk to the hand, pal," Eris said as she dramatically turned her head and held up her hand.
"That's no attitude to have towards your partner," Nico said with a smirk.
"Excuse you, bitch," she said in the same tone as that one vine.
"You weren't aware? Nico will be accompanying you on your quest," Chiron said calmly.
"EXCUSE YOU, BITCH," she said again. Mr. D would've WHOOPED her if he were still here, but he ran out of fucks to give a long ass time ago.
"Nico was very convincing in his argument to allow him to come with you. He reminded us that you are still fairly new to camp and have little experience."
"MUTHA FUCKA-"
"And besides, it sure helps to have what a mortal would call the spawn of Satan on your side," Nico said, still smirking.
She stared into his soul, and initiated another staring contest. This happened sometimes during their arguments, and everyone else had learned to ignore it. Everybody, including Chiron, walked away, knowing they'd be here for a while.
Eyes watering, suffering, Eris blinked. Son of a bitch has been practicing.
He was still smirking. "Let's get going then, shall we?"
"I hate you."
"Right back at ya."
Argus wanted to shoot himself the entire drive into the city. Eris and Nico's bickering about the pettiest bullshit was exhausting.
"At least I'm not emo."
"...What does that mean?"
"HAHA ARE YOU SERIOUS?"
"I WAS BORN IN ITALY IN 1932, YOU CAN'T HONESTLY EXPECT ME TO UNDERSTAND ALL OF YOUR STUPID POP CULTURE REFERENCES."
"Emo means your a whiny little bitch with hair over your eyes and too much eyeliner."
"What the fuck is eyeliner?"
It was a huge relief when Argus finally arrived at the 7-Eleven the monster was supposedly last spotted at. He yelled a "stay safe" and zoomed off as fast as legally possible.
The two of them decided to start their monster hunt by asking the only person present to watch the whole ordeal go down.
Nico and Eris walked into the 7-Eleven, asking the cashier if Margaret was working today. Margaret told them what she saw: a big, burly man run after a little 11-12 year old girl and try to fucking bite her. He was just as the victims at camp had described. Big, angry and gross.
The two of them spent weeks hunting down the monster terrorizing Camp Half-Blood, and ran into a bunch of monsters on the way. The first one, a (ill decide what kind later) had gotten a hold of Nico, and because he was saving his powers to fight Mr. Big Boy monster, he was defenseless other than his sword. At the last minute, Eris swooped in and cut the creature's head off, and as she walked away, she turned around and said "you owe me one."
"No I don't, I saved you first."
"The fuck? When?"
"When we first met, remember?"
"Bruh I was doing fine."
"The hell you were."
"Okay, new challenge. Every time one of us kills a monster, we'll keep score, fair? Then we can find out who owes who at the end of the quest."
"Sounds good to me."
They picked a page in Eris's notebook and made two columns with their names at the top, and they each started with one tally. Whenever one killed a monster, she made sure to be the one that wrote it down.
Once Nico asked about it, saying, "Why don't I ever mark it down, it was my kill this time, I should do it."
"You're never getting your hands on this notebook, Death Breath." The inside was full of sketches of Nico and herself (holding hands, making out, you name it) and yes, they'd all been drawn after she'd officially met him.
"Whatever you say, your Royal Bitchiness."
    "Shit-for-Brains."
    "Ratchet-Ass Skank."
    "Ass hat-"
    She was cut pat a voice yelling "CAN YOU GUYS PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP AND HAVE SEX ALREADY." They'd rented a room while they hunted for Mr. Big Boy monster, and the walls were rather thin.
    "WE'RE FIFTEEN YA CUNT," Eris yelled in a British accent.
    Nico adopted a Scottish accent and yelled "YEAH, PUT EM UP YA PACE O' SHET."
    The voice let out an exaggerated groan.
    When they weren't fighting monsters, insulting each other or irritating the shit out of their neighbor, Eris and Nico got surprisingly deep. One night, he even got to talking about his sister Bianca and started crying. It caught her off guard, but soon she was crying too.
    But with this closeness came an issue: the sexual tension. They agreed to have a one-bed room to save what little money they had for rent, no matter how opposed to it they were, and the bed was only a twin-size mattress. Every night, so matter how fucking stupid he'd been the whole day, Eris REALLY wanted to fuck him.
    And when they'd completed their quest and killed the monster that had been attacking half-bloods, Nico just couldn't shut the fuck up about his score, which was one point over Eris's. He just HAD to be the one to finish him off. His competitiveness was annoying, but she had no right to complain. She was self-aware about how intense she got.
    "I wiiiiiiin."
    "I heard you the first time, you melanin-deficient asshole."
"Ahhh it's fine, I know you're just jealous."
"I am not, I could've had that."
"But you didn't."
"I remember."
"Because I'm better than you."
"You are so not."
    "Then why did I get more kills?"
    "Cause you're a try-hard."
    "So, what are you gonna get me? I win, you owe me, that was the deal."
Shit, what am I gonna get him. She didn't actually expect him to win.
"Erisssssssssssss."
No response.
"ERISSSSSSSS."
Now she was deliberately ignoring him.
"ErisErisErisErisErisErisEr-"
"WHAT, WHAT THE FUCK?"
"...What are you gonna get me? Lunch won't be enough."
"I don't know."
"Better figure it out."
"I will."
"You should."
One more second of this and Jules-Albert thought he might die. Again.
Back at camp, when their friends were done celebrating their return, Eris sat by the lake and just watched the fish and ignored the slutty water-nymphs waving at her. They were hot, but annoying.
"Sup, fucker."
She didn't need to turn around, all too familiar with his voice by now. "Hey, Nico."
"So," He sat down next to her. "Have you decided what you're gonna get me?"
"Nope."
"C'mon, I'm tired of waiting. Just hand me a stick and call it a sword, something."
"Well just wait a little longer."
"What if I don't want-"
He was cut off when she suddenly turned away from the water, grabbed his shirt and kissed him innocently, unlike those water whores.
Nico sat in shock for a second, before he leaned forward and kissed her back. Eris pulled away first.
"Do I still owe you?"
"Nope, you're good."
They kissed again. This time, he leaned forward and initiated it.

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