Lover Boy💔(A Changlix Story)

xx ⚠️

"FAGS..."

Felix's head snapped to face the person the voice belonged to. He was now facing an unfamiliar boy who had a disgusted look on his face. The boy slightly pushed his desk forward and he leaned towards Felix. "You're gay... aren't you." He spat.
Felix started to slowly slip his hand out of Changbin's. "Is Changbin your boyfriend or something? I thought I saw you in Bang Chan's arms in the cafeteria."

Felix didn't know how to respond. This boy who he had never met was being such a dick.
"W-why are you so cruel?" Felix muttered. The Australian's heart was in his throat and he felt like bursting into tears.
"You gay people are disgusting..." Felix immediately fully let go of Changbin's hand and he just looked at the boy dumbfounded.

Changbin suddenly felt Felix's touch was gone and he looked to his right to see Felix looking extremely pale and shocked.

"What are you gonna do? Cry to your boyfriends? Boohoo~" The boy taunted.
"Shut up..." Felix said in a low whisper whilst his voice slightly cracked from the overwhelming amount of emotion that started to build.
"Cut it out Choi..." Changbin said as he realised what was happening. "Leave him alone."
"I do what I want... I used to fear you Seo Changbin, but you're like him... you're pathetic." He spat.
"Go to Hell San."

"I'm sorry, is there something that is more important than my lessons right now? School is for what?"
The teacher exclaimed.
"Learning..." The three groaned.
"Thank you! Now, Felix turn around, San move your desk back!" San made sure to give Felix and Changbin one last nasty look before shuffling away.

"Alright thank you! Now back to the board. Chapter 5 states that..." This went on and on for the next hour until finally the bell rang. Felix collected all of his things and without even waiting for Changbin he immediately left the classroom. Weird... Changbin thought as he gathered his stationary.
The rest of the class left and the only people left were San and Changbin. The two both had bones to pick.

"What the actual fuck is wrong with you?" Changbin growled as he approached the other who was sitting at his desk, feet up. "You're one to ask when you're the homosexual." San laughed.
"You're a sad excuse of a person. There is nothing wrong with loving who you love."
"Awwww~ Seo Changbin is in love. You were once so great. You had 7 girls at your disposal and all the girls begging to be yours. You're now an outsider. What happened to you Lover Boy?"

Changbin so desperately wanted to beat the shit out of the latter, but he learned to control himself.
"You are lucky that I am civil." Changbin spat. He grabbed San by the collar and he looked into his eyes. "What are you gonna do? Kiss me?"
"If you want..." Changbin smirked. He glanced from the younger's eyes to his lips and San suddenly felt powerless and he gulped.
"Flustered?" Changbin mocked.
He let go of San and walked away whilst whistling.

~

Felix had finally reached the dorms and he groaned as he dropped his bag onto the floor. He jumped onto his soft and comfortable bed and he laid on his back, staring at the ceiling to distract himself from his dangerous thoughts.

His mind went back to when he had come out to his parents... so many months ago that it felt like it was in a completely different life time. Felix wanted the memory to leave his mind but his brain betrayed him. It kept replaying until Felix was sobbing uncontrollably, practically gasping for air. He just wanted to be with someone who loved him the way he loved them who just happens to also be a guy.

He wanted love like any other, but why did he have to be considered different, inhuman or downright disgusting. Who was he kidding, he was so desperate for Changbin to like him back even though the older didn't love him back. He loved Hyunjin.
Damn... life sucks. It's far from fair, beautiful or perfect. Felix wanted to control as much of his life as he could, but at times like this, it felt impossible.

He felt numb, all of his crying did a number on him. He felt distraught and completely exhausted. He glanced at his bathroom, the door slightly open.
He dragged himself to the room and he stared at his reflection. Red eyes. Dark circles under his eyes and his hair unruly and tangled. He spotted the razor on the bench next to the sink.

⚠️TW⚠️

He had never tried to cut himself, it seemed like a good idea at the moment. Felix had a few mental problems before moving to Korea, he thought he had gotten over the dangerous thoughts but, his interaction with San had unleashed his horrible memories, the event from earlier that day feeling too familiar.

But today, Felix was too tired, unbothered to make himself feel better or worse. He went back to his bed and drifted off to sleep, hoping he would wake up from his nightmare.

⚠️END⚠️

~

Changbin soon arrived at the dorm, restlessly packing his things away, quickly pouring a glass of water for the younger. He slowly approached the door and he could hear Felix's soft breathing and sight shuffles on his bed.
"Lix?" He asked once he heard the younger stop shifting. He slowly opened the door to see Felix now in a deep sleep.

He placed the cup on Felix's desk and he approached the younger, adjusting his position and tucking him into his soft blanket. "Today was tiring for both of us Lixie." Changbin softly muttered as he ruffled Felix's hair. "I'm so sorry about what happened with San."
As if Felix could hear the older at that moment, he voiced a little hum. "Mhm... it's kind of fun to pretend you can hear me, am I disturbing your sleep Lixie?" Changbin joked.

Once again another hum escaped Felix's lips and Changbin smiled. "I should go then mhm?" He stood up from Felix's bed and slowly tiptoed to the door.
He took one last look at the Sleeping Beauty.
Changbin suddenly remembered that one night. Their lips pressed together, Changbin caressing Felix's adorable and freckled face. He remembered feeling so complete.

"If I kissed you sober... would've you kissed me back?" Changbin whispered before leaving Felix to sleep in peace.