girl singing in the wreckage ✰ dave grohl

nine

the first time cherry shot up it was backstage of a nirvana show. the band was in the final stages of recording nevermind, and this was the final show they were playing before embarking on their tour. max was the one with the smack, and she was also the one who reassured cherry that everything would be fine. and it was. it was more than fine-- it was fucking heaven. she felt as thought she was floating outside of her body, observing as the world floated around her. and that was the first time she kissed max.

it was like kissing a cloud, and she was soaring through the skies, gripping onto max's hand like she was the one thing anchoring her down. it could have been her smacked out state, and chances are it was-- but it was then that cherry realized she loved max. she never told her, and she never would, but in that moment, the felt more love for max than she had felt for anyone else. and she decided, second to max, her next favorite thing was heroin. because she wanted to feel this way forever. 

the thing was, max was able to regulate her intake of most substances (besides her nasty smoking habit that most of the friends possessed as well) but cherry couldn't. she had an addictive personality, and had max known this prior to injecting the needle in her vein, she wouldn't have even thought about giving cherry smack. but she didn't know. the second the drug hit her, cherry knew there was no going back. this was the feeling she had been looking for her whole life. 

the lay together, curled up on a couch backstage when dave and april walked in. they exchanged a glance at their two friends, who had passed out on the couch, and shrugged, too drunk on their own love to worry about anyone else around them.

dave and april had slowly been picking up the pieces of their... complicated relationship, and had been taking the time to figure out what they wanted to be for each other. for the time being, they weren't exclusive-- it was an open relationship. but that didn't mean they weren't both falling for each other. 

as people began filing in backstage, drinks were passed around, and dave's arm was fastened comfortably around aprils waist. whenever her attention would stray, or she would space out, he would take her hand in his and place a kiss on her neck. it seemed too good to be true, too calm, no chaos. she leaned her head against his chest as they stood, conversing with the people who were hanging out backstage. she jumped, however, when a loud bang sounded, and confetti poured into the room.

there kurt stood, with a cheeky grin on his face and pure happiness in his eyes.

"nirvana's going on tour!"

aprils eyes and mouth widened, and she turned to face dave, who wore a wide grin. she flung her arms around him, peppering his face with kisses.

"oh my god, why didn't you tell me?!" he exclaimed, squeezing him tight.

"because i wanted it to be the right time to ask you." he replied. she tilted her head to the side in confusion.

"ask me what?"

"if you want to come on tour with me and the band-- cherry and max are gonna join too, cuz we got our label to have them as our opening act." april's eyes opened even wider than before, and she broke into a grin.

"of course i'll come! dave, this is amazing!" april flung her arms around his neck, and dave leaned down to hoist her up, her legs wrapping around his waist. he pulled him in for a long kiss, and when they pulled apart, she smiled. 

she loosened her grip on him, and he let her down. she grabbed him by the hand and led him over to the couch, where she plopped down beside him. as she conversed with people, she could feel daves stare on her face, and when she was finished speaking with someone, she turned her head to face him.

"what are you staring at me for?" she teased, elbowing him.

"i can't help it. you're beautiful." he replied, tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. she rolled her eyes.

"oh, romeo. i bet you say that to all the girls." she spoke with a cheeky smile, placing a kiss on his lips.

"no..." he began, pulling her in for another kiss. "just you." he wrapped his arms around her waist and hoisted her on to his lap, where she rested her head on his chest. after resting there for a while, the party backstage started to mellow out a little bit. "i know you probably don't want to talk about it... or hear this... but if you need to talk about anything--"

"i know, dave. but... i don't want to spoil the first good thing that's happened to me in years by dumping my shit on you and scaring you off." she whispered back from where her head rested on his shoulder.

"what would make you think that sharing your feelings would spoil what we have?" he replied, sounding almost hurt.

"dave. i don't want to talk about it. please." she spoke firmly, and he didn't reply. they stayed there for a while longer, listening to each other's breaths. april combed her fingers through dave's hair, and dave ran his hand up and down her thigh.

it was these small forms of affection that were what april cherished the most. and she knew they were what she would miss the most, when dave had inevitably decided he didn't have the capacity to be with the mess of the girl what she was. and she wouldn't be mad, she supposed. she wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone like her. maybe that made her selfish.