Single and Seeking Barson story

Chapter 43

The pain that Olivia felt seeing tears in Rafael's eyes was almost indescribable, and unbearable. "Rafa, please say something?"

"Did Dr. Taylor rape you?" He asked, his voice cracking,

"No, Rafa, no. I'm sure he didn't. I know that you wanted to be the first person to see me when I woke up in the hospital. The reason Amanda saw me first was because she picked up the rape kit."

"Just because a rape kit doesn't show anything doesn't mean an assault or a rape didn't occur ."

I'm telling you, I wasn't raped. I can't tell you that he didn't want to, but I wasn't raped."

Rafael took his cell phone out of his pocket. and dialed it. He heard the phone on the other end ring twice before it was picked up. "Barba? You Okay?" Fin asked..

"It was Dr. Brad Taylor. He got into Olivia's apartment, and attacked her." He answered.

"I'm gonna go talk to him. I've had a security detail on both of you, since Liv was released from the hospital."

"You need his address?"

"No I have it, I never liked the guy." Fin replied. Before, Barba could say another word, Fin hung up.

"I'm getting you some more hot tea, What you have is cold already." Barba said, picking up her mug, and walking out of the room. When he returned Olivia was gone. He put the hot tea on the table and called out her name. "Olivia, Olivia, Liv!"

"Rafa, I'm here. I'm right here. I'm safe. I just went to the bathroom." Rafael turned to his best friend, and quickly threw his arms around her in a hug. After a moment, he felt her squeezing him back. They held each other for 5 minutes, each feeling the energy radiating from the other. Rafael finally let go, Olivia felt his absence, and hated it.

He looked into her brown eyes. and after a few seconds he whispered. "Please, sit with me." He led her back to the bed, and they both sat down side by side. Rafaell turned to face her. "I don't want to think of a world without you."

"You don't have to."

"My life would be hell."

Tears glistened in Olivia's eyes. "I'm afraid to think about a world without you, Without Rafael Barba, it would just end."

"Why did you give Dr. Taylor the time of day?" Rafael almost whispered.

"I told you. for a while I thought that he was normal, and I wanted normal for Noah, and myself."

"I get that you wanted the white picket fence with a guy whose parents were still together. He said. louder than he intended. "But there's more to it." He was right, there was more to it. How much of it could she reveal without losing her best friend.

"I wanted to make it work." She answered, softly.

"Why? Let's just pretend for a minute that Dr. Taylor was a nice guy. You weren't comfortable with him. I've seen you comfortable."

Olivia picked up her mug, She took a long sip of tea to give herself time, and to calm her nerves. She put the mug down after a moment, and explained. "I love Noah. I love being a mom, being his mom. For years when I walked into a room, I could see heads turning, I could feel it. When I was a uni I was the one picked first if a honey-trap was required. Heads don't turn when I walk into a room anymore Rafa. I thought I was OK with that, but I've been having a difficult time with it. I'm aging, and I'm invisible now. Dr. Taylor put me up on a pedestal I didn't realize I wanted or needed. His head turned. He wanted me. He saw me as more than a mother. I'm so embarrassed that I needed that, I'm embarrassed to talk about it. I never said these things out loud."

Olivia looked into Rafael's intense green eyes, they were wide. He looked shocked." Are you kidding? He asked loudly. Olivia you're so, so beautiful."

"I'm not.. You don't have to say that. I'm shocked I feel this way, but I do, and I have for a while. I told Amanda when she started working at SVU that there were good guys out there. I always thought I had time to not only find someone, but to be with them, but I'm so busy, and it doesn't matter, people look right past me."

"I'm sick of you putting yourself down!" He walked to her, and grabbed her hand. "Come with me. He said, leading her quickly out of the room he made hers. They arrived at the bathroom. Rafael opened the door, put on the bathroom light, and rushed into the room. They stood by the vanity, and stared at each other's reflection. "Look in the mirror, and repeat after me. He instructed after a few seconds.

"Rafa, we don't have to do this."

"You have to do this! Look in the mirror, and repeat after me. I am Olivia Benson, and I am a Badass!"

Olivia did as he requested. "I am Olivia Benson, and I am a badass."

"I am Olivia Benson, and I want a man, but I don't need one!" Rafael screamed.

"I am Olivia Benson, and I want a man, but I don't need one!"

"I am Olivia Benson. I am gorgeous! "

"I am Olivia Benson, I am gorgeous!"

"My name is Olivia Benson, and I am a role model to all I come into contact with.."

"My name is Olivia Benson, and I am a role model to all I come into contact with.."

"My name is Olivia Benson. I am breathtaking. I am majestic. I am amazing." Rafael said softly. He saw tears in her eyes now.

Olivia laughed, looked deeply into the mirror, and repeated " "My name is Olivia Benson. I am breathtaking. I am majestic. I am amazing."

"My name is Olivia Benson, and I am seen." Rafael said in almost a whisper.

"My name is Olivia Benson, and I am seen." Olivia took a deep breath, and looked away from the mirror. She turned to her best friend. Within seconds her hands were clutching his shirt, and then her lips were touching his.