Bloodline ✦ Nomin

39

⊱ ─── { Jeno } ─── ⊰

Though there is a light knock on Yeeun's door, there isn't much time between it and the door opening for Jeno to invite the person in. Not that he would do so anyhow.

"Hey, sweetie," Yeeun's mother speaks ever so softly to him as she he gets the room, "Yeeun told me Jaemin left...She wouldn't tell me why, but based on the fact you haven't left this room all day, I can't imagine it's good." She sits down on the side of the bed where Jaemin had been earlier that day. The thought was like pouring lemon juice on a deep gash. The memories that keep replaying over and over in his head won't cease, and it was killing him slowly but surely. "Would you like to talk about it?"

"No," Jeno lies as he pulls the blankets up to his chin.

Yeeun's mother sighs deeply and lies down beside him. She reaches out and brushes his hair out of his face, revealing just how puffy and red they are.

"I don't know what happened or how serious this whole thing is, but...believe me when I tell you: true love always finds a way," she tries to assure him, but it doesn't work.

"Not this time...He's gone for good," Jeno's voice comes out in barely a whisper, "I messed up really bad this time...He's not coming back."

The woman frowns deeply as her brows turn upward in sympathy.

"You know...people say a lot of things they don't necessarily mean when they're upset or angry. Sometimes when people are wounded, they'll say things with the intent to make the other person feel the way they do, regardless of if they really mean it," she murmurs, "I think that, with a little time and a bit of effort showing Jaemin how much you love him and miss him and are willing to work things out, he might just come around...Give it some time, sweetie. Things will be okay. I promise."

But she can't truly guarantee that. Jeno knew better. He knew the extent of the things he's done, and he knew better than to believe that time would heal the wounds he's inflicted. Nor will it heal the ones inflicted on him. Only Jaemin could aid those. Still, he wanted to think maybe she wasn't completely wrong. Maybe a false sense of hope could help him pull through, even if it was nothing short of a delusion.

"What if things don't get better? What if you've done something so unforgivable that there's no hope of things being okay again?" Jeno asks earnestly.

"I don't understand. What do you mean by 'unforgivable'?" she asks with genuine confusion in her voice.

Jeno lies in silence for a moment, considering whether he wanted to tell her about what he'd done. He didn't want her to view him in a terrible light, but everyone else does. What difference would it make if she hated him too? It wasn't as if he hadn't been in practically the same situation before, back at home. He spent years after his mother died being either feared and hated by everyone around him. Everyone except his father. Though Jeno knows now that he was only using him as a puppet for his own agenda, at least he had that comfort of feeling like he belonged...like he was needed.

The isolation was devastating, though he formed a callous exterior to make it seem as if he didn't care. The bitterness and hatred of the world around him made it so easy to want to destroy. Jaemin had shown him love and acceptance and inclusion. Jaemin was the reason he even had people he could call friends or allies. Perhaps that's what makes this whole thing so much more painful than before. He was given a taste of the life he desired beneath all the resentment and anger he had, but he allowed his impulses and insecurities get in the way and destroy all of it. Jeno was a destructive being at heart, and this whole thing proved it.

Maybe Jaemin was right. Maybe it would be a cold day in Hell before he could ever change.

"I lied to Jaemin about the severity of my headaches for months. I hid it from him so he wouldn't worry...but he ended up finding out," Jeno explains, "He was pissed, and I thought I was going to lose him. I thought I ruined everything. I panicked and uttered out the incantation for a love spell. I was going to remove it, but things kept getting worse. By the time I had the chance to, I knew that if I did, he'd leave me for sure."