Bad Sanses x Reader: Parody Version

Parody Nine - The Jealousy Cliché

Nightmare sans found a book he thought Y/N would like to read. It took him a lot of time just to steal it in an AU he dislikes. When he got back, he just witnessed Y/N getting tickled by Cross sans. How dare he touch the body of his partner, right? Pfft.

"Stop it, Cross." Y/N glared at him and was rather annoyed by what he was doing to them. "This is considered sexual harassment if you keep on insisting. And this is not funny. Why would fanfictions make me blush and stutter at this kind of thing? This shit ain't a joke."

"Ah, sorry..." Cross said quietly for a second and added "senpai."

Y/N can't help but let out a chuckle. "Ew, that's gross." They said.

"I knew you'd hate it." Cross said.

Nightmare pouted and stormed his way in the throne room. Killer was there staring at the ceiling because he was bored. He teased Nightmare for a bit and stopped when Nightmare mentioned Y/N. "Cross tickled them as if they're fucking dating! That's not possible, right?"

Killer laughed and asked why he was throwing a huge fit out of something so trivial, then was lost for words when he thought about it for a moment. Y/N getting tickled by him and laughing together just like that? Oh hell no. It was obvious: the guys were jealous.

Killer left the room to find the both of them. He only found Cross instead, but that was fair enough. "Hey, Cross!" Killer said to him passive aggressively. He placed his arm around Cross's shoulder. "How was your time with Y/N? Had fun?"

"Why? Are you jealous?" Cross jeered and shrugged Killer's arm off. "While you have the time to be jealous, make sure to spend that on watching us quietly, all right? I think this is my moment to shine. Too bad I'm cooler than you in terms of production quality."

Killer snorted and laughed hard enough to grab him by the collar and threaten him. He admitted he was pissed off. He also admitted he was jealous. "Why? Do you like Y/N?" Cross asked.

"Yeah I do! And what's more annoying is that I don't know why. It's probably some stupid plot idea, but whatever. Thing is, you're annoying me. Stay away from them."

Cross pushed him aside and readjusted his uniform. "You know my answer as always. No."

Y/N was eavesdropping just beside a wall. They sighed in pity because they expected this to happen. "I didn't even do anything to make them fall in love but the shit happened anyway. Ah, why is my life so terrible?"

They left and went inside the library. Murder was there by chance, or he waited for them on purpose. He talked to them but Y/N ignored him most of the time. "So... I heard you were with Cross. What happened?" Murder asked. Y/N finally looked at him but sternly. "Nothing at all. I assume Killer told you about it. The guy was jealous. Are you?" Y/N said.

"Well, yeah. But why?" Dust groaned in frustration. Y/N patted his shoulder in pity. "I feel a little bit bad for you, but well, illogical shit gets us all. I'll find a way to break this, so worry all you want."

Dust was hurt when they said that. What can he feel? I'm the one controlling his thoughts after all. He hugged Y/N and said "That hurts a bit. Don't you care about my feelings for you?"

Horror witnessed the whole thing and walked away angrily. Y/N pushed Dust and glanced at the open door. "Someone saw us. I assume it's Horror because of the smell of food occupying this room right now."

"Wait, he was there?" Dust said. Y/N sighed in pity and stated it should be obvious. "Don't do that again." They added and left the library to check on Horror. They saw him eating like a glutton. He was frustrated. Error came in and Y/N figured out he'd share it with the glitch. "Why *BEEP* why the fuck did you empty the fridge?"

"I..." Horror munched a chicken leg. "I am trying to eat my frustration whole. I saw Dust hugging Y/N, it was the worst!"

"...Wwwwwhhaa *BEEP* what??"

Y/N sighed in pity and went in the training area to prepare for an imminent rain of cliches. They waited for a while to hear the screams of "They're mine!"

"They're mine to begin with. I met Y/N first, so back off." Dust said pointing fingers at everyone.

"No, they're obviously mine." Killer said. "We have more moments together."

"No no, they're my cupcake!" Horror pouted like a baby.

"I'm sorry, but in terms of production quality, I'm better off with them." Cross said.

"Who *BEEP* who the fuck cares about production *BEEP* quality? Stop acting like *BEEP* kkkkidss crying ovverr candy." Error said.

"Everyone, don't forget who the one in command is." Nightmare smiled in an innocently dark way. "I suggest all of you to stay away from them."

Y/N threw a knife in the middle of the argument. They had a bow and arrows, sword, daggers, and of course the umbrella. "All right, idiots. I suppose I have to wake you all up from your dreams. Get back to reality."

"Woah, hold up!" Cross said. "You're not gonna attack us with those, are you? Why would you?"

"If it means ending the cliche once and for all."

"Before that," Murder intervened. "Can you guess what we were about to do the moment we saw you here?"

Y/N cooled down a bit. "You were having these impulsive desires of kissing me to declare your ownership, or maybe considered harassing me. This is why I have these weapons ready, to help you all escape this shit."

"How do they know everything?" Murder asked the others. They all shrugged. "Whatever. You can't fight us all anyway. It's you versus this badass villain group-"

Y/N shot Cross with an arrow and ran towards him faster than they expected. They kicked his jaw and he rendered unconscious. "One thing you should know about me." Y/N said, "Is that I have great physicality. It's going to take a lot more than just magic to beat me. You need to stop being stupidly predictable. Besides, the heavens are on my side. I can't lose because of plot."

"Wha-" Dust was startled when Y/N almost hit him with a dagger and was pushed back with blue magic. "Okay, that almost got me-"

An arrow shot his right rib and everyone was on their guard after Y/N made Dust unconscious. They beat the shit out of everyone already. When Nightmare was the only one remaining, he waved a white cloth. "I surrender."

Y/N bowed slightly and wore their earphones that appeared out of nowhere. Cue Sherlock Holmes's theme song with a dramatic walk out.