Find me in the Ocean

Chapter 12

I lock myself into the bathroom and my head's all over the place.

I kissed Aidan...

I... I actually just did that. I mean it was a dare, I know, but...

There's a loud knocking on the bathroom door.

"Hey, Ethan, it's me." Sophia says. "You okay?"

I don't respond. I don't even know how to respond.

"Oh yeah Sophia, I'm all good. Just in here having a crisis over the fact that I enjoyed kissing Aidan more than I enjoy kissing you, my girlfriend"

Yeah, like I'd say that. What is wrong with me? UGHH...

"I told Brad off for it. He's already apologized to Aidan about it and asked me to apologize to you for him." She says, followed by a faint giggle. "Ofcourse I told him to fuck off. Like hell I'll apologize for him, why won't he just apologize to you himself?"

It honestly was a very big dick move of him, but... I don't regret it. Is that weird?

I let out a sigh as I stare at my own reflection and my green eyes are staring back at me.

What's so interesting about me anyway?

I move my hand up to my face and my thumb brush over my lower lip. I can still remember Aidans lips pressed against mine, as if they've left an imprint on me.

I sigh out loud. What am I even doing?

I take off my glasses and place them next to the sink, and I just stare at my reflection.

"Do you want me to come in?" I hear Sophia ask after a long minute of silence. But I don't say anything. I don't want her seeing me like this. I need to get back to my senses...

I turn the faucet on cold and place my hands under the running water. I let it fill up my hands for a moment as I just stare at it, before splashing it in my face.

...

I open the door to the bathroom and Sophia is sitting on the ground just outside the door, but she quickly gets on her feet as she sees me come out.

She gently grabs my face and kisses my cheek before grabbing my hand.

"You know, we could leave if you'd like." She says. "My place is empty all weekend, so we could go back there."

"No, it's okay, I don't mind staying if you want to stay." I quickly reply, barely even registering what she said. "Where's Cal and Jamie?"

And where's Aidan? I don't know if I want to see him or ignore him at this point, but... God, another drink sounds so good right about now.

"Oh... Well last time I saw them, Jamie was out back and I left Cal on the sofa."

"Let's get another drink!"

I start marching towards the kitchen, still holding Sophia's hand.

"Hey, Ethan!" I hear someone say as we entered the kitchen. Of course it's Brad. He's leaning over the drinks table, chatting with Sarah.

God, please just leave me alone for one minute!

Brad stands up and grabs a cup from the table before walking over to us.

"Sorry, bro. Didn't mean to mess with you and Aidan that much." He holds out his hand towards me and hands me the drink. "Are we good?"

I stare at the drink with a blank expression before taking it. The drink is a kind of dirty purple color and doesn't look that great, but I could go for anything right about now.

"I mixed a few things together. I can go grab something else for you if you'd like instead" he adds as to break the silence a bit.

Ah, fuck it... And I drink it all at once. It honestly tastes horrible, but I don't react. I just walk past Brad and place the empty cup on the table.

"We're good" I say.

...

Everything's spinning right now. After finding Cal on the sofa in the living room, we sat down next to him. I lean myself back over the edge of the sofa and stare at the ceiling. The music's loud and the roof is spinning around and I close my eyes for a second.

"You okay there Dunn?" I hear a voice ask. I open my eyes and Aidan is leaning over me.

"Never felt better!" I slur out as I throw my hand up onto his head and ruffle his hair. "Your hair is so soft!"

Even his hair is perfect. Why is he so beautiful?

I keep on ruffling his hair and without realizing it, our faces were getting closer together. I never noticed before, but his eyes almost looked like they're a bit green...

I stop and stare at his lips once again, slowly moving my face closer to his.

"What did you even drink to get this wasted?" He ask and I snap back to reality, letting go of his hair.

What am I even doing?

I finally sit back up straight, before grabbing a hold of Sophia's wrist and draging her off the sofa.

"Come on! Let's dance!" I yell out.

...

After a few songs, the floor is full of people dancing and having fun. A slow song comes on and I pull Sophia closer to me. We're swaying back and forth and she pulls me even closer and hugs me tight. I noticed it a few minutes ago, but Aidan's been looking at me for a while, following all of my moves. Not Sophias, MY moves.

I hug Sophia back, giving me a better view of Aidan, who's sitting not that far away from us. My eyes immediately land on Aidan and we make eye contact for a brief second before I close my eyes.

If I close my eyes, it's almost as if I'm dancing with Aidan. A shorter version of him, but I don't really think of it that much. All I can think of is that I'm dancing with Aidan and that's nice.

I feel her pull away from me before a pair of lips press against mine. Her lips are soft and nice, but it's a lot different from kissing Aidan. His lips are softer and a lot wider than Sophia's lips, but if I concentrate hard enough, I can hardly tell the difference. I could still feel his small stubble brush against my upper lip.

I feel my chest tighten and my heart starts to beat faster the more I think back to that kiss and I completely forget Sophia is even there. Right now, all that's on my mind is I'm kissing Aidan while slow dancing with him.

It's so nice.

I slowly open my eyes, my lips still touching hers, but I'm not looking at her. All I see is Aidan. He's sitting on the floor against the windows facing the patio and chatting with people around him. He laughs at something, and the room lights up around him. Then his face turns towards me and we lock eyes. I quickly close my eyes again.

Did he catch me staring at him!

I don't dare open my eyes again. What if we actually just locked eyes while I'm kissing Sophia. But all I can think of is kissing Aidan... And how he might still be looking at me. Maybe he's imagining himself kissing me?

I slowly open my eyes one more time, and Aidan's looking right at me. It's not like he's staring at me, just more glancing at me secretly. And as we lock eyes once more, I can't bring myself to look away from him, and it feels like he is thinking the same thing, and I'm no longer kissing Sophia, but Aidan once again.