Reincarnated As The Heroine's Twin Brother. {Hiatus}

A Look Into Lily's POV [14]

I like to think this is how Lily felt all through out her journey, whether it be her past life or now. Time going too fast for her, will she catch up?..


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Events Before the kidnapping~


It was the time where the sun shown the best, it was where the sun could rest from it chase of the moon as it rested before looking for it again. It was noon. The warm blanket of the sun was resting upon every area it reached.

A library with decoration made from dark oak shinned as the blinding golden light of the sun shinned in through the windows. It created a warm aesthetic making anyone who laid their eyes to sit inside and read or take a nap.

There a lone girl stood beside the window, she a beautiful short blue hair, they reached up to her neck. Her eyes of a similar colour to her hair. She excluded a natural aura of innocence making anyone at aw and on their knees.

However, her eyes were cold and emotionless making one question if what they were looking at was really a child. This child was none other than the famed Lily.

Lily was deep in thought, she was thinking of the plot. Her fifth birthday would come soon and it was the fated day where she would be hated by her family. Lily was hoping she would be able to avoid whatever the world had planned. Yet, she couldn't help but feel uneasy.

There was a feeling in her gut telling runaway, to not deal with her family. The feeling was eating her up inside, her heart would hurt as if it was being squished every time she thought of her family faces full of hatred.

'I don't want that.. not again.. no, no, no, no..' Her mind kept repeating similar sentences like a broken record. She looked out the window, maybe if she jumped no one would have to die? Her family wouldn't hate her but love her and miss her?

Her heart started stinging again. She pressed her shirt around the area where her heart lay. Her throat felt croaked, it hurt. It felt like she wanted to let something out but couldn't.

The corner of her eyes turned redder every second and just like a throat, her nose started to sting.

"Sniff.." Before she could control her emotions, drops of tears started to fall down her face. For every knew tear came she whipped it off like it never existed however, her face was a giveaway she was crying, it was all red.

"I don't.. hic.. want.. hic.. h-hate.." She muttered through her sobs. instead of using both her hands to wipe her hands, she used only one as the other was busy trying to cover mouth, afraid of leaking out any voices.

Lily didn't want others to hear her, she didn't want them to see her being weak. Her sobs leaked out, muffled, they were however not loud enough to warn someone of her presence.

Lily had been preparing for this day, unlike Neo, she had been practising her magic early on so she could avoid having Neo killed. But, no matter how hard she tried she could never get as good as the games heroin, her powers would freeze a small object for a few minutes.

This was an amazing feet for a child not even 5, if she was known she would be declared a genius. But she didn't care, she didn't care about anything if it didn't help her avoid it. What was the point of these powers when she couldn't even protect her and her brother?

"hic.. s-so.. use-hic-les..." She muttered in anger. Her head hurt, it was ringing again and again making her dizzy. She used the shelf as a support to herself.

Laying down on the floor, Lily stared at the ceiling with emotionless eyes. Her eyes were still puffy however, her eyes and nose were red. Her cheeks hurt from constantly whipping tears. She was tired, she didn't want to deal with this.

'Why did it have to me? I'm so useless. I should have just died. If it was someone else..' Tears once again plagiarised her eyes. Her heart, her head, her throat, they all ached with pain.

Taking deep breathes, she tried calming herself, once again. Her cheeks hurt from the constant whipping but she couldn't help it since the tears poured without her consent.

When Lily first found out about who she was in this world she had a really bad panic attack. It was bad enough to danger her life and put the whole duke household into an uproar. Because of that she tried to keep her feeling inside and never letting them out, she felt bad and didn't to bother others with them.

She had tried her best to keep her distance from the family but still, no matter how hard she tried to keep her distance, the family had warmed her way into her heart. Therefore, she was really weak to having panic attacks.

The day getting closer just made it worse. Even her mother could tell something was up, she had been skipping family outings, even avoiding eating because she didn't want to see them. She was afraid she would cry in front of them.

Her mother had asked Lily what was wrong on multiple occasion but Lily would just runaway. Therefore, the duchess told the the servants to send food to her room and not to bother Lily too much until she felt better. The duchess didn't understand what was wrong, she already had a doctor check up on her health and everything was fine with it.

She wanted her daughter to at least be comfortable therefore she tried her best to make an environment for her daughter where she could think go herself and came out when she was ready.

Lily appreciated that allot, still, she wished that the duchess wouldn't have done and had just screamed at her. Then she would have a reason to hate her mother when her mother would start hating her but now she would feel worse than before.

Lily wasn't strong, at least that's what she believed. If she could she would have jumped off the window already but she didn't want her family to be sad over her. She couldn't make her mind, she wished she could be put into an eternal sleep.

There were chances that her family wouldn't hate her but, Lily's self-esteem was too in the dump to think about that. 'I can't save him even if I tried.. if I could only stop it before-.. I'd probably fail that too... damn.. I don't.. want.. here..' She thought.

Tears once again dripped down her face clouding her vision of the oak-y roof.


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The day of the birthday~

Since today was the day that the kidnapping would take place Lily had decided to meet her family. She cried allot the few days before so she wouldn't have to cry today. She tried her best to act like her normal self..

She acted strong, cold, she wouldn't show any weaknesses. Luckily, she managed to pull it off. Her mother was happy but for Lily's sake didn't over-react and instead gifted Lily with allot of head-pats. Lily tried her best to avoid them since she was about to cry and they were not helping, at all.

Luckily for her, he brother had made up a plane to cry to runaway from their father and sister. Though she wouldn't admit it, she used that chance to let out some of her real feelings. This made her more stable in interacting with her family, she was very happy for that.

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Time-skip to Lanai and Anne(demon girl) flirting~

Lily and Neo were left alone, though she was afraid she kept her cool.

*Ruffle, ruffle*

Suddenly she heard the bush behind them ruffling, because she was already alarmed, she thought it was the kidnapper, instantly.

She looked around and noticed guards watching her and her brother, if she used this chance she would be able to catch the kidnapper and not be hated by family. 'Fuck 'hated' they'll be so proud of me hearing I saved both me and the dumb-ass.' Lily thought.

Because of her delusions and over-confident thoughts, the forget that she was no longer of earth but a world filled with magic and mystery.

She neared the bush, ready to scream at any given moment and alarm the guards to catch the kidnapper. However, what she didn't expect was her legs to be the one caught.

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Time-skip to Neo and Lily being kidnapped~

'Its all my fault.' Lily was having a panic attack. Her over-confidence had shadowed her logic and she couldn't think straight of the situation therefore doing what she did.

She couldn't blame herself as she had stayed up for three entire days from anxiety and was in no shape or form to think logically. However, did she consider this? No, she blamed this all on herself.

Even though she was directing the blame from her and fighting with Neo right now, she blamed herself more than anything. Fighting with was he only escape form her feelings, if Neo wasn't there she worried she'd have a similar panic attack to when she was a child and might end up either killing herself or hurting Neo because of her powers going pandemonium.

She regretted learning her powers before she reached the age of five. If she couldn't even protect her bitch-ass of a brother now she had to worry about hurting him too?

'I make all the wrong decisions.. Ugh, why am I like this.' Lily grumbled, she was no better than her past life, she was as useless as ever.

The only she could do was try to freeze the ropes into breaking but they wouldn't budge. If anything it just hurt Lily as she was not used to the cold temperature of iced ropes. Her ego was at an all-time-low and was taking an even deeper hit.

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A/N: I tried my hand at emotional writing, how was it? Did it make you cry? Did it make you feel sorry for her? Well you'll feel even sadder knowing her past.

Anyways, commentttt.