Breaking

Chapter 34.

I would never disrespect Arabella by saying her relationship is just young love or it means nothing or it won't last long. I hate when adults say that, talking shit like they were never that age. They talk like young people's feelings don't matter. It  pisses  me  the  fuck  off.

Arabella and I went to our soon-to-be home. Most of the furniture is up and against the wall and there are boxes scattered across the floor. We had some leftover Chinese food from the day before, so we sat on the floor in the living and ate cold food.

"We're going to get sick," I tell her, finishing the last of my food.

"If only, if only," she mutters, her voice low and rough. It's the first she's spoken since the airport. She stops playing with her food and puts down the container.

I sigh deeply. "Look, Arabella-"

"I just need the morning," she says, looking at the space between us. "I need the morning to sulk then I'll be fine. I promise."

I shake my head. "Arabella, I don't want you to force yourself to be happy. It's okay to be upset. Take all the time you need."

She lifts her head until her gaze meets mine. "But I'm doing the right thing, aren't I? He wanted to turn down his scholarship. He wanted to take a year off. He wanted to take two. But I didn't let him because he's smart and the best player on the team, any team. He's doing what he loves; playing football, and I'm happy for him. I'm happy for him."

He loves you, I want to tell her but decide against it. Instead, I pull out the gift he gave me to give to her from my back pocket, place it on the floor, and push it so it slides across the floor to her. I sit up straight and crack my knuckles as she opens the box. There's a long pause where she's frozen, peering down into the box, then she sighs, her eyelids fluttering shut. I bite my tongue. What the hell did he give her? What if it's not a necklace? What if he got her a ring and he only got the long box to throw me off?

What if it's a parting gift?

Arabella nor Alex never mentioned what will happen when Alex left for school.

I want to ask her, but if they agreed to separate for the next two years, I don't want to remind her of it.

"It's a necklace...and inside it says I love you in every language," she whispers. "I didn't even mention it to him, I mentioned it to Patrick only once, but, of course, Alex knew."

Patrick told Alex. He felt sorry for Alex for the way I treated him sometimes, but can he truly blame me? I'm a father, I was only being protective.

"Do you want me to put it on?" I whisper.

She shudders. And I feel it before it happens. I slide across the floor in a heartbeat, knocking over containers of food, and hold her as she breaks down, full-on crying. She's sitting between my legs, clinging to my arm for dear life, trembling and crying. I press my lips to the back of her head and rub her arm reassuringly. "It's okay," I say into her hair.

She cries until her she can't anymore. "I want today to end already. It hasn't even fully started yet and I want it to end."

"What is it?" I demand to know. I know her cries, I know there's another meaning behind her words, I know there's more upsetting her.

"I've been dreading it for months but I could never accept that someone from our family will leave."

"He's doing what he loves, remember?"

She squeezes my arm. "I don't think I can go to college, papa."

I peer down at her. "What? Why not?"