𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐌

𝙃𝙊𝙉𝙀𝙔 𝙊𝙑𝙀𝙍 𝙎𝙐𝙂𝘼𝙍

An old scraped idea of mine from awhile ago.

𝐇𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲 𝐎𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫 𝐈

Please vote & comment your
genuine feedback 🫶🏽
Enjoy!

Ⓒ thefinestprincess
————————————————————————-

Onika released a shaky sigh, wiping her run on tears with her ice cold finger tips, as she read the negative amount of -302.72 reflecting her checking account in her online banking app.

She had officially begun hitting the one area every human commonly goes through at least once in their life time, rock bottom. A girl who once had it all, aimlessly witnessing herself lose everything, slipping easily through the creases of her reality, one by one.

2022 BMW? Revoked.
Platinum credit cards? Closed.
Loans? Passed due.

The only proud accomplishment she had still in her possession was her high rise condo, landing on the twenty-seventh floor in her building. Which was soon whaling at the palm of her hands, due to the thirty day notice placed outside her door for all of her soon to be ex-neighbors to see, holding on by the infamous yellow tape that emphasized, late on rent.

"What am I going to do?" She petite woman continually uttered to herself through her loud sobs. She wasn't the one to cry often, even in the mist of being by her lonesome. Emotional intelligence was not her strong suit.

So when Onika did breakdown, it was usually due to bottled up emotions she's had suppressed over time. This specific time was different. Her world came crashing down like a lumpy pile of bricks, that were once perfectly aligned and stacked. A wrecking ball, caused the chaos to her world and she wasn't understanding the meaning behind it all.

She felt as though she did everything right. Onika understood she wasn't perfect by far, but then again, who is? She tried her absolute best knowing this world wasn't for the weak, and it for damn sure, rarely went in the favor of black women, on top of already being queer.

Adulting as a whole, wasn't for the weak. You have to push through regardless of what came knocking and shoving at life's door.

"Please God. Please. I need a miracle, I need your strength and guidance more than anything right now. Please. My ancestors if you're listening, my guardian angles, please wrap your arms around me and keep me afloat. I need a reminder that everything will be more than okay." She cried, repenting on her knees.

Heading towards her bathroom, she avoided any eye contact to the large mirror before her. She didn't need reality reminding her of a mess she's obtained, due to her lack of beauty care. She knew she didn't look identical to the photo she recently posted on Instagram three days ago, flaunting a 3,000 dollar Chanel bag, she ended up returning the following day.

The lifestyle she tried keeping up with, was catching up to her. Life was beating her ass, as they say—and she wasn't winning the battle by a long shot.

Yet.

Suicidal Thoughts rang through cranium often, but she knew that wasn't an actual choice for her. She only wished it was that easy to just end it all, yet, her pride was a lot of things, but it did stop her from taking the route she couldn't come back from.