LOVE AND LIES || Kth

Part twenty

I miss her. So much.

Like you'd expect, the nights for me are brutal. I'm sat in the corner of my room, after an emotional enough evening with my family, staring with a blank face. My mind was too busy dealing with the emotions I just couldn't be bothered to express them.

I cant get her face out of my mind. And the question I knew I would ask, was screaming in my thoughts.

Why.

Why? Why Lucas? Why Aria?

I was so confused, and it can't end like this. I don't want it to end at all. I have this feeling inside that I know something isn't quite right, and I am so painfully aware of my ignorance.

I know people may have two sides to them, but the moments I spent with her just felt so genuine, so true. I'm battling with myself at this point.

My family were in states of tears all evening, I'd finally seen them all today. My mother, father. My younger sister. We didn't talk about it much, and they didn't tell me anything that happened on their side. I'm not angry at them, but I still feel as if I'm not allowed to know any details- about the murder of my own best friend, the murder everyone blamed me for.

But I know that Aria wants to tell me. And I know Leo does too.

-

I fell asleep after that, on the mattress I have bare on the floor in my room. I'll get a bed at some point. Hopefully.

I had no plans, apart from one.

The sun was shining, beaming down carefree onto the busy city. I was driving, away from it that is. The countryside looked even better in the sunlight than the buildings.

I pulled up, and walked towards the gate.

It would be my first time visiting him in about 2 months, and it was at the top of my to do list.

I knelt at his grave.

"Hey, man," I whispered, sitting down and adding to the already large pile of flowers. My breath began shaking.

"It's been a while,"

I sighed, my head looking up at the sunny sky. It wasn't long after I looked back down so I wouldn't blind myself.

"I hope you know how sorry I am, and that I would give anything to have you back here with us,"

I paused.

"I'm okay. Leo is okay, and so is your family, I'm making sure it's going to stay that way," I continued,

"I'm also making sure that the people that did this to you get what they deserve, I'm going to find out everything, Lucas,"

I left about 20 mins after, getting into my car and driving on the empty roads. I took a different way home, however. I just needed to see it one last time, although I know I've said this before.

She sold it. The cafe, our place.

It was torn down from the inside, everything from it was gone. Concrete walls were replacing the original brown ones, and dust was embedded on the floorboards. It was unrecognisable. Part of me was hoping she was going to be in there, and the other wanted to run in have her in my arms again.

It hit me again. Those racing thoughts, but I made sense of these ones.

I know that day that I heard three people. That means two other people aside Aria, two other people to blame. There's no way she could've done this on her own, and it infuriates me how I am only considering this now.

There's a million stories that could explain her situation, and I was too stubborn to listen. She made so many exceptions for me, she took so many risks.

I took out my phone, finding her number and quickly unblocking it. I told her I needed to see her, I needed to know why.

Because when it comes down to it,

She really did love me, but in order to do that she had to lie.