Black Blood

Chapter 72

Novak's blue eyes change to their red colour for a single second. With one blink his eyes change back to blue. The colour is gone just as quickly as it came. His throat moves, revealing that he is swallowing. He doesn't speak, he just stares at me. This is clearly not the reaction I had expected to receive, let alone the one I wanted.

His stare makes me uncomfortable. I pull my knees to my stomach, sit up straight on my buttocks. I push my knees closer to my body, my breasts hidden behind my bare legs. My arms are wrapped around my legs. I want to beg him to say something, but I don't. I don't want to. I have never been in this situation before and don't know how to react.

It takes Novak a few minutes before he seems to wake up from his transgression. His arms, which have been hanging limply along his body all this time, place themselves next to me on the bed. His penetrating blue eyes look at me inquiringly. I admit it, I am afraid of what is coming next. I'm a lot less sure of myself than I was a few minutes ago.

'Fuck Cel. You should know how long I've wanted to do that.' His words make my muscles tighten. I don't know whether to be pleased or frightened by those words. His head bends slowly towards my knee. Gently he plants a kiss on my skin.

'As much as I want to, this is not the right time,' he murmurs against my skin. His eyes are closed and his tousled hair lies on his forehead, partially covering his eyes.

'Why?' is all I get out. I don't know if it's my fear, ignorance or small amount of disappointment that speaks. If I'm honest, I couldn't imagine a better time than now. He has transformed this dusty musty basement into the most romantic thing a man has ever done for me.He opens his eyes, looks at me from under his long lashes.

'You may not be a virgin physically, but you are a virgin mentally. You have been raped, more often than you care to admit. What that jerk does to you has nothing to do with sex. Maybe I won't be your first physically. I want to be the first one you choose because you want it, not because you think you have to do something in return. I want to be the first one you choose because you can't handle the tingling sensation between your legs. The first to show you how nice sex can be, that it doesn't hurt. The first one who makes you make sounds, makes you close your eyes, makes your mouth fall open in pleasure and the first one who gives you an orgasm.'

I look at him with my mouth half open. I can hardly comprehend that he just said this. It makes my blood run faster through my veins, makes me feel warm and turns my cheeks pink. He has read my intention of tonight like an open book. His words mean more to me than I can comprehend. He is right, in my mind I am a virgin. I have no idea how sex works, how it should be or feel.

Novak lifts his head from my knees. His gaze is fixed on my face, searching for a reaction.
'That doesn't mean there aren't other things I want you to feel. I want to do anything with you as long as you really want to and don't hesitate,' he adds with a small grin on his lips.

Thanks to his words, I am no longer aware that I am sitting in my lingerie in front of him. A strange feeling bubbles up in my lower abdomen, one I hardly recognise. I remember the night he gave me my first orgasm with his fingers. At least that is what he called it. Most of all, I remember that what he did was nice.
'What are you thinking about?' I look up confused, unaware that I had drifted away in my thoughts. A warmth spreads across my cheeks.

'The night you... did something... with your fingers.' I felt highly uncomfortable admitting my thoughts. It felt like something intimate and I was taught not to talk about it.

A new grin plays on Novak's lips. He puts his hand on my lower leg. Slowly his hand slides further over my skin, further and further up. He bends forward, making me lower myself backwards onto the bed. His warm fingers slide further towards my thighs. My breathing speeds up without me realising it at first. I suck in the air through my nostrils.