Night Shifts | Billie Eilish

Chapter Seven

REALIZATIONS AND CLARIFICATIONS

"Bye billie, hope you feel better soon," I farewelled to the girl as she walked off down the hall with her older brother. She looked back at me sadly with almost a betrayed look on her face, before turning back and walking into the elevator. 

I hoped that feeling wouldn't last.

I knew I couldn't talk about us, it was wrong. So I couldn't really explain myself without one, making her uncomfortable, and two, going against the law.

I shouldn't of said it.

Why am I such a fuck up?

 ʚїɞ

I slumped in the plastic chair in the cold staff room on my break. It had been almost a week and a half since I last saw Billie, and she was constantly on my mind. I'd been holding off on checking in, hoping she would come around herself, but that wasn't going so well.

I picked up my phone with a sigh and glanced at my empty lock screen. It had just hit 8 pm, so I knew Billie would be awake. I opened it up and clicked on her contact. My fingers hovered above the keyboard as I chewed my lip.

"Just text her."

I jumped in my seat and looked around to see Elle walking in, clicking her pen. "What? How long have you been standing there?" I asked. "Long enough. I'm not that dumb. There's something going on between you two," she spoke. "Who?" I asked, puzzled.

"Billie."

"No, there's not, I swear," I defended, putting my phone down. "Then why does her name have a heart next to it?" Elle said, pointing to her contact name. "Fuck you," I rolled my eyes and shut off my phone.

"Nothing's happened," I said, adjusting my seat. "Uh huh..." she nodded. "Come onnn, just tell me. I'm not gonna tell Kerrie. I promise," Elle said, taking a seat opposite me. I let out a small huff. "I gave her my number to text me if she needed help instead of coming here every night. Last week, shit happened, and she ended up staying the night at my house. The next morning, I pried, and obviously, she was very sensitive to the topic, and I freaked her out. I also said something stupid as well. She hasn't checked in since," I told Elle, mostly all in one breath, my cheeks turning a bit red.

"Damn girl, you know this is so against every law ever, right?" she said. I nodded. "I know, I know, but fuck, dude, there's just something about her that draws me in. I'm fucking attached to someone I barely know. It's so weird," I groaned, throwing my head back.

"I get it. Us queers, we fall in so deep so quickly," she joked, nudging me, making me laugh. "Tell me about it," I said, picking up my phone. "I just want to know if she's okay," I sighed again. "Just do it. I know it's gnawing at you," Elle encouraged before getting up and going back to whatever she was doing.

I typed out my sentence about five times until it didn't sound cringy, clingy, or too emotional.

+1 213 854 5881

hey billie
you doin okay?

Immediately read popped up below and my stomach turned anxiously. I chewed my bottom lip waiting for a reply, only for it to be short and dry.

i'm fine.

please be honest with me

i am being honest

 im fine harley.

i'm finding it hard to believe you
why are you being so blunt?

im not.
if your just here to pick on the way i text you can leave now

are you upset with me?

maybe

was it last week?

maybe

i'm taking that as a yes

please talk to me, what's been going though your head since then?

nothing

billie cmon

please

i want to help

it wasn't you
i mean kinda
but mostly in my head
i got sad

sad about what sweetheart?

you shouldn't be calling me sweetheart

why not?

because you have a little.

oh

did you think i had a little?

well you did say so...

no i said technically
i was meaning you silly goose
it just went over your head
im sorry about that
it was too soon anyway, i thought it would lighten the mood
i didnt mean to make you feel sad

oh
im so dumb 

no you aren't shhhh

it was inappropriately timed and i shouldnt of thought you wouldve inferred that

it's my fault
you aren't dumb
you're cute.

you think i am?

of course i do

Billie took longer to respond than usual, leading me to believe my comment had some type of effect on her.

billie?
you good there love?

SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

hehe
i've gotta go now back to work
ill talk to you after though?

yes please
byeeeeeee

👋

I shut my phone off with a small grin on my face. I shoved it into my pocket and headed back out into the ward. 

I found Elle with Mara and decided to help her out. He's a bit of a handful sometimes.

"So how did it go? You seem happy," Elle whispered as I grabbed a new line to change out mara's ng tube. "It was a miscommunication, it was pretty cute actually." I whispered back. She smiled, "That's good."

I nodded, "There's just a feeling I have that I think this is going to end very badly."

900 words.