tongue tied - jake kiszka

32.

The weekend came quickly and I found myself standing in front of the mirror, putting on my makeup for my date with Lee.

And all I could manage to think about was Jake.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror, assessing every detail down to the smallest clump of mascara on my eyelashes that I couldn't seem to separate. "Use something small like your tweezers or- Oh! What about a needle?" Dawn suggested from her seat atop the toilet lid.

"I'm not putting a needle anywhere near my eye."

She shrugged. "Probably for the best. Your hands are hella shaky." I looked down at my hands and clenched my fingers into a fist to try and get them to stop. "It's just Lee. Why are you stressing?"

"I'm not stressed about Lee." I said, letting out a sigh. Dawn raised her eyebrows and I knew she wasn't letting me get off that easy. "Jake called the other day. He's in town this weekend." I explained quietly, almost ashamed for not telling her sooner.

Her eyes widened as she stood up quickly to join me by the sink. "And?"

"And," I began, "He wanted to see me."

"You better not have said you were busy."

"I am busy. Will be busy." I checked the time on my phone, "In like thirty minutes. So please let me finish getting ready."

Dawn rolled her eyes not so discreetly and patted me on the back. "I am not happy with you for keeping this information to yourself. But I'm going to let it slide because you look hot and I do want you to enjoy yourself tonight."

I smiled to myself as she left the bathroom. I appreciated her more than I'd ever be able to tell her. I should probably work on my communication skills.

   My phone buzzed and I picked it up quickly, expecting it to be Lee. It wasn't.

   Jake: Still hoping to see you this weekend.

I stared down at the message. I wasn't expecting him to text me after our phone call a couple days ago. I honestly wouldn't have blamed him if he had chosen to never speak to me again. But it was Jake and I knew better.

My fingers hovered over the keyboard, hoping that I could find the words, any words at all to type back. A message from Lee popped up suddenly, letting me know he was on his way and I snapped back to reality.

I was supposed to be getting ready for my date with Lee and I was wondering what to say back to Jake instead. My growth as a person seemed to be at a standstill.

I glanced back up at my reflection, my phone still in hand with Jake's message on the screen. "Do you wanna wear one of my dresses?" Dawn called out from her bedroom, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah." I answered as I set my phone down on the counter and headed over to her room. I would worry about Jake later. It would do me no good to worry tonight.

Dawn ended up letting me wear a cute green dress of hers that she said her boobs were too big for her to fit into it anymore. Luckily mine fit. She told me my makeup looked great and my hair looked great and I wished I felt as great as I apparently looked.

Lee sent me a message saying he was in the parking lot so I told Dawn goodbye quickly and agreed to update her before heading out the door. When I got to his car he scurried out of the drivers side to open my door for me, complimenting me as he did.

He looked very nice and I told him so which earned me a few more compliments. "I thought I'd take you to this nice restaurant downtown. They're fairly new and I can't ever remember the name but I think you'll like it." He was rambling but I found it sweet.

I smiled at him, assuring him that I'd like whatever restaurant we went to. "Do you wanna listen to something on the way there?" Lee asked, offering me the aux cord. I felt shy with my music all of a sudden, knowing it wasn't everyone's taste.

"You can play something, I don't mind." I said, motioning for him to take the aux back. I wasn't sure what I expected him to play but the boys band definitely wasn't what I had in mind.

"This is from their album. It's so fucking good." Lee explained giddily. He reminded me of a little kid sometimes. I would've found it cute if he wasn't playing Jake and them's music during my existential crisis.

I forgot that I had literally met him at one of their shows.

"Isn't it good?" He asked, turning his head slightly to look at me with a cockeyed grin. A guitar riff spilled out from his speakers and all I could think about was the way Jake played, eyes closed, his fingers moving quickly-

"Yeah, it's really good."

We listened to the bands music the whole way to the restaurant and when he finally turned it off I felt my body loosen. "We're here." Lee smiled, turning off his car and hurrying over to my side to open the door for me again.

I knew I should be enjoying myself but I felt unnerved from the ride. "I made us reservations." He said as he reached for my hand. I took it without thinking and let him hold it as we walked into the restaurant.

I stood a little ways away as Lee went up to the hostess to give her his name and time for the reservation. "I'm so sorry, I don't know how this happened." I could hear her saying and I moved closer to him to hear.

"What happened?" I asked Lee quietly. "They have our reservation but there's no open tables for us." He explained, throwing the hostess an understanding look. "We do have space at the bar if you'd like to go over there until a table opens up." She said, motioning towards the bar area.

"That would be fine, thank you." Lee nodded and she let out a relieved smile, probably glad that we weren't the type to make a scene. We followed her over to the bar and Lee pulled out one of the stools for me to sit on.

I sat down, accidentally bumping elbows with the person on my left. "Oh sorry." I apologized quickly. He smiled back at me, letting me know it was okay. Suddenly from the other side of him, another head popped into view.

"Holy shit."

It was Josh.

"Hey." I managed a weak smile, looking around quickly for any signs of Jake. "What are you doing here?"

"We are in a meeting and Henry is buying drinks." Josh patted the man on the back and pulled him in close. The older man let out a laugh, a sound that came deep from his belly. "That's how I like to do my business."

I grinned at them, trying to ignore the knots that were twisting in my stomach. "I like to laugh. What's funny?" Another voice spoke from behind us. We turned only to see Jake, smiling widely.

He noticed me quickly, his large grin turning into a smaller, more intimate feeling one at the sight of me. Lee turned in his seat to look in the direction we were all facing.

And I watched as Jake's smile dropped from his face entirely.